gJZMv2iJ

1Username: yourhostandpatron
2
3Album: Golden: Honestly, i think Golden may be a response God gave to gays who thought Joanne was a boring and mediocre album. There's a funny and slightly incredulous trend of inserting country elements into pop music that can work surprisingly well, and there's trying to go along those lines but failing to exhibit the entire point of such an idea so disappointingly that your new release feels like no more than a funny footnote in your career. Golden is not a bad album, but for an innovator like Kylie Minouge who could have done so much more with the cowboy aesthetic she tried to pull off this era, it sure is a sad sight. There are good tracks here, but I find them hard to treat as anything more than echoes of what could have been. Even Golden's highlights, such as Dancing and Raining Glitter, are merely incomplete forms of something greater that never came into existence. I fear that I've been a bit too mean to the record, but it's just too painfully standard for my preferences. If Kylie's found a way in the past to combine creativity and effort whilst simply having fun, I don't see why she couldn't have done so on Golden.
4
5Dancing: 8.5 Golden may have disappointed me as an entire album, but I have to admit that it begins on a high note, even if the songs I'd include under that category are still just a little too generic for my taste. Dancing is a great, or, if you'll excuse me, a golden example of what I'm talking about. I'm not going to make a point about how it shows Kylie aging gracefully, because that'd potentially fall into troublesome territory, but as mildly surprising as it might be to hear a pop music titan like her sing the phrase 'when I go out, I wanna go dancing', I don't think I've ever seen a lyric as satisfactory as such a simple yet revealing statement. These are the words of a legend who's done everything under the sun just going out and having fun with her freshly crafted music, dancing all the while, and that as an aesthetic can be reassuring on its own. Dancing might not be particularly innovative or even much of a country song, but even if it's nothing compared to what Kylie can make herself capable of, it sure is fun. 
6
7Stop Me From Falling: 8.5 Stop Me From Falling is more of the same fare from Dancing, but though the two songs don't deviate much, I have to admit that this second track is incredibly enjoyable. It's still not country enough to live into the hype, but this exhibits a sort of nostalgic glamour in this fun, incredibly youthful way that makes me happily surprised. Kylie showing that she can do songs like this despite how long she's been around is just proof to me that she still knows have to a good time. That may have hindered some other aspects of Golden, but ultimately, this is a triumph.
8
9Golden: 7 You know what I find interesting? Golden's credits list one Liz Rose as a cowriter for the song, and that same Liz Rose used to be Taylor Swift's partner in songwriting about a decade prior to Golden's release. Rose seems to be focused on helping make country pop come to life, which makes sense, since Golden's title track is the closest the record actually comes to country. Golden isn't as exciting as the previous two songs on this album's tracklist, but it's sweet enough to make a minor impact, and I enjoy it simply for seeing a link between Kylie and Taylor. I have no quarrel with it. 
10
11A Lifetime To Repair: 8 This song is the closet Golden ever gets to blending in with some genuinely moody country at least lyrically, although sonically it may leave yet to be desired. It's essentially an edgier and more depressing clone of Stop Me From Falling, though at the very least, A Lifetime To Repair is by no means bad. (And speaking of which, neither is Stop Me From Falling.) In conclusion, as a track, it may be entirely fine, though I will say that at this point Golden sounds so homogeneous that it becomes easy to worry for what the rest of the record is going to bring. 
12
13Sincerely Yours: 8.5  Theoretically, I get what Sicerely Yours is trying to do. It's supposed to be the wise, grand ballad in the middle of this record where Kylie's supposed to get more personal than ever and get ready to kick ass at the same time, and it's designed to be a fan favourite deep cut, although, to be fair, I do not actually know if this got released as a single or not. To be fair, Sincerely Yours does more or less achieve these goals if you're a dedicated Kylie fan, and it's not even too bad if you happen to be the opposite. There's some actual creative motivation here that I appreciate, and Kylie pulls off the image she tries to construct here without any sense of effort. I have my doubts over the simplistic production and the extent of Kylie's vocals, but this is still a favourite off Golden. 
14
15One Last Kiss: 7.5 One Last Kiss is a bit grating, if I'm being honest. It's an above average song, but that chorus Kylie delivers...is not it. There should be nothing wrong with it theoretically, but it sounds like Kylie is trying to lead a choir that's not actually present in the studio by raising her voice up to dangerously accommodating pitches. I don't find much to come back to here, but I also don't find it forgettable as much of Golden's second half. In a way, its decent yet slightly unattractive execution makes it the perfect track to come after Yours Sincerely; that's a song along the same vein.
16
17Live A Little: 5
18
19Shelby '68: Shelby '68 fits a lyrical and literary trope I've been observing for awhile now that I can see in a lot of media I consume. The trope I'm talking about involves mentioning a specific object in a specific category, like a car, and makes sure to mention what commercial brand this object belongs to. A nice example of this is, of course, the legendary lyric 'so baby pull me closer in the backseat of your Rover', which Shelby '68, quite honestly, doesn't even come close to topping. The realistic side of my mind wants to see this as a method of creating nostalgia, but my cynical side also thinks that it's all a grand scheme capitalism's deviced. I am going on this pretentious rant because Shelby '68, is, frankly, very dull. It's not too bad, but it tries to go for that feeling I mentioned in my first hypothesis whilst falling to produce any kind of similar effect on listeners. And when pop falls into this kind of tepidness, we all start disliking it, don't we? 
20
21Radio On: 6 "The War of the Worlds" is an episode of the American radio drama anthology series The Mercury Theatre on the Air directed and narrated by actor and future filmmaker Orson Welles as an adaptation of H. G. Wells's novel The War of the Worlds (1898). It was performed and broadcast live as a Halloween episode at 8 p.m. on Sunday, October 30, 1938, over the Columbia Broadcasting System radio network. The program has become famous for supposedly tricking some of its listeners into believing that a Martian invasion was actually taking place. The illusion of realism was furthered because the Mercury Theatre on the Air was a sustaining show without commercial interruptions, and the first break in the program came almost 30 minutes after the introduction. Popular legend holds that some of the radio audience may have been listening to The Chase and Sanborn Hour with Edgar Bergen and tuned in to "The War of the Worlds" during a musical interlude, thereby missing the clear introduction that the show was a drama.
22
23Love: 0 Okay, look, I know that Golden fans exists, but for the life of me I can't see why anybody would possibly like this. It's not even three damn minutes long (not necessarily a factor in evaluating whether a song's good or not, but clearly no effort was put in to this one) it features the blandest sounds and lyrics imaginable, and the chorus here is not only unoriginal, but also poorly constructed and quite painful to get through. I've heard LOVE in other artists' music about a billion times before, and I like it even less when Kylie does her take on this tired melody. It's glaringly obvious that this was written to be filler, and I doubt it was filler created for the intent of enjoyment between Kylie and her fans.
24
25Raining Glitter: 8.5 Raining Glitter is the closest Golden ever gets to inspiration past its glorious opening track, and thankfully it deserves all the acclaim it gets. Combining elements of disco with country in the vein of Kacey Musgraves songs such as  Lonely Weekend and High Horse, Raining Glitter is glorious yet painful in the sense that it represents what Golden should have been; a fun, campy record mixing a bit of country magic with Kylie's magnificent presence as a cultural icon, carrying an aura of uniqueness to it whilst still attracting even the most basic homosexuals on Earth. I'm sad the rest of the album wasn't like this, but, thankfully, the song is too much of a bop for me to dwell on my frustration about this.
26
27Music's Too Sad Without You with Jack Savoretti: 7 Of course, the only way to end an album like Golden is to end it with the kind of ballad that appeals best to sad Asian mothers who have a stiffled amount of nostalgia for the 90s. Heck, Music's Too Sad Without You even has an unknown white dude attached to it; I'm trying not to make this comment too mean, but come on, Kylie. Thankfully, I'm not really the best person to consult whenever people want displays of rage against this kind of kitzch, and, yes, even if I acknowledge this song could be considered bland, I at least respect the fact that it pays some amount of debt to the traditional archetype it ultimately stems from, unlike most of Golden's mild forays into a shaky boundary between regular pop and more country tinged music. 
28
29Album: Caution: What does the phrase 'return to form' mean for you? What do you feel when you see it in music reviews? If an artist's new release gets called such a phrase after a series of particularly disappointing bumps in the road, do you feel relief? Or do you worry about the lack of exploration and experimentation that the description may entail? There's a delicate balance worth talking about in our answers to those questions. The fog of confusion you may experience from trying to navigate how you respond to these kinds of comments,  however, is lifted completely by records that are as good as Caution. Yes, this really is Mariah's return to form. This really is her artistic comeback, if not her commercial one. Yes, this really is Mariah's best since Scary Monsters. No, wait, I meant that this is her best since Butterfly. Eh. Gay icons are gay icons. I mix legends up sometimes! If you didn't think Mariah still had it in here, Caution is set to correct that. Not since the mid 90s has she combined the concepts of RnB and pop, old and new, accessible yet thoughtful, and sleek yet infectious in her music as acutely as she can so expertly be. As much as Caution owes to the lady's prior innovations, it also owes just as much towards Mimi's capability of staying in touch with her favourite genres and their place in whatever the current state of popular music tends to be. Whether you're in the mood for some 90s nostalgia or you're a fan of modern acts who's trying to get in the old stuff that's been thrown in your face by salty aging folks hidden in a cloud of anonymity for far too long, Caution will, nine times out of ten, succeed in getting your attention. And to the people who missed the mark: I think your opinion is valuable, I really do, but I'm just so sad you can't understand that Giving Me Life is actual proof that God is a being that exists and cares for all of us. Maybe you'll see the light someday. Someday. I'm sorry, this is patronizing (ha, ha, ha!) and I'm being so delusional in this comment that I'm about to choke, but all I want to say is that Mariah did THAT, and I for one, am going to proudly proclaim Caution the best album in this rate. I'm not being serious, by the way. I can see why you'd prefer Honey or even Liberation. I just want to be a drama queen. I'm really sorry. This is why people hate lambs. I'm going to cry. Stream Giving Me Life before I go. Honey won, didn't it? 
30
31GTFO: 8.5 GTFO was, in some twisted way, chosen to be the lead single for Caution, even if it was originally intended to be shelved in favor of...who knows? Maybe Runaway was intended to be a part of Caution's tracklist until Mariah decided to include GTFO for some reason. The thing is, as much as we may lament the loss of whatever disappeared from the standard edition of this record, you can't deny that GTFO still has a cool, sleek, mellow yet paradoxically impatient vibe to it that really just shows the best of Mimi's skill. A song that's perhaps most adequately described as a grower rather than an immediate standout, you'll never really learn to love GTFO until you understand just how powerful Mariah's sass is in this track. Her words and lyricism elevate the already promising atmosphere of GTFO into a new level of pleasantly cruel, and, overall, the song can be called something of a mid-tempo slapper. Thanks for the music, Mimi!
32
33With You: 9 Some music fans unfamiliar with Mariah often dismiss her work by assuming that her albums are full of nothing but ballads, a sad generalization that's argubaly a leftover from her troublesome Sony days. Though that description only applies to Music Box and maybe her first two records, an occasional song or cut from her latter day canon can fall into the habit of justifying that stereotype. For that reason, I've no doubt that some will see With You as 'boring', merely due to the fact that it's an RnB ballad near the very start of Caution that doesn't have as much oomph to it as, say, Portrait does. These people have the right to express their thoughts on it, but I am sorry to report that they are wrong. With You may be a slow burner, but that's why it's so special: communicating an atmosphere of snowy delicacy as it calls back to thoughts of the past, even referencing Breakdown, a highly personal single from 1997's Butterfly that failed to succeed on the charts despite critical acclaim, With You is a subtle yet chilling journey into a relationship that reveals the totality of Mariah's emotions. It's melancholy, it's intimate, it carries a touch of regret, and it's yet another great display of Mimi's stunning talent. The song always stood out to me as one likely to be unfairly judged, and seeing as my love for it has grown, I can only help that Popheads will take the smart road and be kind. Otherwise, the subreddit will see the extent of my fury. 
34
35Caution: 9 I'm not sure there are even adequate words to describe how much of a pop masterpiece Caution's title track is, but I guess I can try my best by typing all these useless words again like the salty journalist homo I happen to be. If I have to pinpoint something about Caution that just elevates i t into the pantheons of a perfect pop song, at least in the realm of my perspectives and opinions, then, in all likelihood, I'd probably mention how its sound almost seamlessly matches its themes. Slow to the hype meter yet seductive in its anxiousness, Caution strikes the light that made most of Butterfly sound so special by appealing to that particular sphere of emotions Mariah and her listeners share where fear is rightfully frightening, yet exciting. Mariah might warn her new lover about bridges they shouldn't burn yet again, but it's in songs like this where she's in her catchiest yet in her frankest. And isn't that quality in Mimi's music we all love? No wonder Caution is compared to her best albums.
36
37A No No: 11 What I like about Caution is that it brings back Mimi's propensity for combining her excellent ear for refreshing melodies with a sort of hip hop wit in her lyricism that ultimately stems from her mixed heritage, all of which tends to be in her best moments topped by some incredible production. There are many times when Mariah reaches these zeniths on this record again, but A No No is arguably the best display of the sheer, effortless talent that I'm talking about. A snappy, sassy rejection of a target that may either be a creepy man or a certain annoying secretary, the song, while not the hit we hoped it to be for, is a perfect example of why Caution and Mariah's music as a whole can still hold up in 2018. The only thing I dislike about it is that I used to think she sings 'I won't be like Kendrick/you won't deal  with an I' in the second verse, but she actually wrote in a lame Gilligan Island reference instead. Oh, well. I love Mimi too much to hold grudges against her.
38
39The Distance ft. Ty Dolla Sign: 8 The Distance was originally planned to be Caution's 'true' lead single, although the addition of GTFO onto the album may have screwed that label up. Either way, whether we're still going to call it our first formal introduction to Caution or not, its purpose is more than a little obvious. References to publicity and reputation, the usual celebrity gossip we have to deal with as either a devotee or as the leader of cult, and a guest bridge from none other than a paragon of apathy like Ty Dolla $ign makes its hidden intent more apparent if the genre-savy listener already knows where to look. On a record that's as suprisingly tight as it is, the Distance's placement in Caution's smack middle may be glaringly obvious, but what's forgivable about that is that the song is genuinely a good herald for Mimi's current era. No, it's not the best from this album by a longshot, but despite all the flair the Distance presents that you may be slightly bothered by, it also present a graciously satisfying sense of triumph. Arriving at the scene after yet another troublesome moment in Mariah's life, its gratifying yet worldly flavor is one that makes one thing clear: no matter what she's gone through, and no matter how rough the last couple of album cycles have been, Mariah is still thriving. That's what matters in the end. Also, Ty's appearance is weirdly attuned to a fantastic release of escasty, so maybe you can forgive him for this one. 
40
41Giving Me Life feat. Slick Rick and Blood Orange: 10 It's always a moment of joy when Mariah takes the high road and collaborates with hip hop artists and producers who are worth the coin that she's built instead of picking the sort of absolute nobodies her 00s work tended to be infiltrated with. Giving Me Life, which I'd go as far as to call the twenty-first century's answer to Killing Me Softly, is a perfect example of just how brilliant Mariah's music can be when she decides to both make use of the connections she's capable of taking advantage of along with her vast knowledge of what makes rhythm and blue in order to produce a track that succeeds in what it reaches for to the greatest degree imaginable. Seductive, playful, passionate and nostalgic, with just a hint of infatuation in its amorous tone, Mariah comes back better than ever with such gravitas in Giving Me Life in a way that we haven't really seen since she made The Roof that every note making up the song's composition that the glory of how good it all is will come down crashing on your mind like a tidal wave and leave you craving for more. Filled with the beautiful spell of reminiscence previously seen in the aforementioned cut, the similarly sensual production that makes both tracks so unbelievably gorgeous is aided by the ace contributions of such splendid fellows as Blood Orange and Dev Hynes. And to top it all off is that guest rap, which is simply so effortlessly flawless that the final verse at the end of the song might as well haunt your mind forever. And I use to dread that ending crescendo of chaos, but you know what? It gives such a sharply damning atmosphere to everything else that that extra minute is just  unquestionably the space it's given. Yes, I'm not making Giving Me Life my 11 because it isn't likely to win (knowing my luck, it's gonna place first after this) and because my duty as a stan makes me determined to defeat the Swedish Lady, but make no mistake; this is, in my opinion, the best song in this rate. And, heck, it may be one of the best things Mariah has ever released. I think I may have sold my soul to the devil by not giving it the score it should properly receive, and that's alright. I deserve it. Let me be the new Faustus, then. The tea is that Mariah is the new Queen of Heaven, the new Mother of God, and I am her humble yet shamefully disobedient servant. I should be struck by a lightning bolt any time now, and I'm going to accept my fate. Folks, don't follow my example. Please recognize how much of a crowning achievement is for your own damn safety. I don't want to see you where I'm going. 
42
43One Mo' Gen: 7.5 'One More Gen stands out a little annoyingly compared to the rest of Caution as a whole, if I do so say so myself. It's often referred to as the one track that people don't exactly hate, but more or less to fail understand the purpose of. And, yeah, I can see how that's true: 'One More Gen is mostly a generic sex box above all else, which isn't really out of place for Mimi (she put Honey on her most raw and honest record, after all, and we all know what that one's about) but this song is also kind of awkwardly put together and a little less reliant on the sleek sound that we've all came to expect from Mariah, treading the edge between sounding just as cool as Caution's other gold mines, and sounding a little poorly thought out. It is my least favorite song from Caution, sometimes switching places with Stay Long Love You, but the sad truth is that both of those still bop.
44
458th Grade: 9 8th Grade is a great relief, a role which I'm more or less assigning it because of how it's in between my two least favourite tracks on Caution (fair warning, though: if you give those tracks I just mentioned less than a 7, you will burn!) It's extra proof to the pile of evidence that Mariah is one of pop's most magnificent songwriters in both musical and lyrical skill, but it's also unique in the sense that it's a glimpse into Mariah's adolescence. As a survivor of what could be called a tragic childhood, Mimi's explored all the doubt she's experienced growing up prior to becoming famous and wealthy ever since she's began making music, but her teen years have always been a gap in how fans have perceived her backstory from her art alone. 8th Grade adds a missing episode to the canon by putting into detail just how complex her feelings of attachment as well as insecurity may have developed as a result of such an upbringing, perhaps shedding light into why she may have gone into a toxic relationship with her executive manager in the early 90s. I don't mean to psychoanalyze Mimi from this song alone, but art as simple yet as revealing as 8th Grade does intend to make its audience wonder. Either way, it's a genius stroke of pop perfection from Mariah. If you've had a straight crush, you can definitely relate! 
46
47Stay Long Love You ft. Gunna: 8 I used to see Stay Long Love You as the only song from Caution that I didn't love, or even like. There's the fact that Gunna is in it, for one. The strange thing about him being here is that he isn't among the very depths of the rappers Marah's chosen to collaborate with that would either get a 'who' or a 'lol' nearly all the time their name is brought up, but I still didn't know who the hell he was when I saw him here, and I'm still not a big fan of his voice. What ultimately saves Stay Long Love You, though, is its production. While the song is much simpler than many of its fellow tracks off Caution, what prevents it from being plausibly described as low-effort is its production, full of a series of RnB clicks and synths that make Mariah sound like she's hit the sweet mark more than she realistically should. This is not the best trophy you take home from Caution, but Stay Long Love You is, fundamentally, still a more than decent example of Mariah's talent.
48
49Portrait: 9 Portrait reminds me incredibly well of all those heart-wrenching ballads that Mariah used to end her albums with back in the 90s, when she was at the height of her popularity. Heck, the lady admitted that her first five albums all had a depressing finale until she released Rainbow, which I, coincidentally, also see as one of her worst releases. Portrait is a return to the melancholy depths of that tradition, and it's no less the better, acting as a sort of spiritual sibling to Looking In from 1995's Fantasy. Though Mariah is in a better place in her life now, Portrait shows that she's still struggling, and that she's willing to acknowledge her dark past; in a way, such a method of release makes me less worried for her than I should be.
50
51Album: Liberation: In a year full of mediocre drops, Liberation was one of my biggest surprises of 2018. Before it was released, I had a general dislike of Christina thanks to misconceptions of her stemming from how much I used to love Britney (and I still do adore her, though she's not the type of act I stan anymore). But when Liberation was released, I decided to take a chance and listen to what she had to offer, and I'm very happy that I chose to do so before this rate even came up on the table. Full of pop hooks that explore their sounds without straying too far from the iconic image Christina's made for herself, Liberation is a very pleasing reminder as to how pop icons can have a wide appeal and remain incredibly creative at the same time. It's a record that has more depth to it than you think it would have, and it's made me hope that Christina will still be remembered in the years to come. I can't say that I've found the time to check out her older music, but Liberation has definitely improved my opinion of her, and more listens to it will always boost that opinion further.
52
53Liberation: 7 I think instrumentals in pop music have historically been a bit of a mix bagged (my suspicion is that the ones from Low and Heroes made everybody else pack up and go home) but there's hope for the idea if you look at Liberation. Fulfilling the idea of a beautiful and haunting overture much more than, say, Hayley Kiyoko's introduction to Expectations did, Liberation should be an exciting indicator to skeptical listeners coming into this record that Christina has begun making new music that's actually good again after the disaster that Lotus was (well, outside Your Body, that is.) It's not good enough to be something out of a movie, but Liberation is gorgeous in a way that leaves you more hopeful than not.
54
55Maria: 8 I don't know why Kanye just decided to bring back his chipmunk sampling for Christina (maybe that's a deliberate throwback, seeing as Christina was most relevant when he used to do that?) but I'm not really sure it works as well in Maria as it did in the past. I'm already weary of hearing Michael Jackson for some pretty damn obvious reasons, and I don't need to hear him as a kid tainting what's supposed to be a moment of passionate introspection for Christina. Even past the controversy this'd entail today, that voice is just distracting compared to Christina's vocals performance. This is a damning and powerful song if you take into account all the work she does alone, and I have to question whether the techniques Kanye uses here are as effective in modern pop music as they were in last decade's hip hop scene. I don't mean to say Maria is bad, because I still enjoy it, but, God, would it be so much better without the sample!
56
57Sick of Sittin': 8 Sick of Sittin' is a track deliberately designed to create a pop anthem suited for the arena instead of individual listening, even using sound effects to create the impression that Christina is at some kind of boxing fight instead of at the studio singing her heart out. The final product is one I've gone back and forth on for awhile, but as of present I do enjoy this song, even if I don't think it's quite as full or complete as it hopes to be. The spoken word section from Christina at the middle can be cheesy, but it is a teensy little charming. The production on Sick of Sittin' is also pretty energetic, so if you're the kind of person to enjoy what's going on in a song's background, perhaps you'll enjoy the thrill of the crowd here over anything else. 
58
59Fall In Line ft. Demi Lovato: 8.5 I've seen some reactions dismissing Fall in Line's central message because its two lead artists are both rich, powerful women who are unlikely to suffer an unbearable amount of oppression under our modern-day patriarchy. It is true that Christina and Demi are still quite privileged in one way or the other, and the fact that two artists previously from Disney known for their excessive belting made a song together is still really funny, but I'd prefer it if people didn't discount what the two are trying to do here. Message to cis gays: you don't know what it's like to be a woman! Even women in the highest positions of luck and influence can suffer from misogynistic assumptions. Fall In Line is brazen and powerful, and it features the sort of resolute anger that's calm yet determined in such a way that you'll be wanting to call yourself a feminist from then on. It's intended single material, but it's great. Not one of the best on Liberation by a long shot, but I hope its average isn't too low.
60
61Right Moves ft. Keida and Shenseea: 8 Reggae is a genre that pop fans tend to be as alienated by as much as classic rock or heavy metal, if only because its musical style is so foreign. You could argue that there's also a racial element to this dislike, although I'm not keen to debate about this stuff today. Given that, it might feel like a means of betrayal for Christina to make Right Moves, but honestly, wouldn't you people agree that this actually went pretty damn well? I'm usually as bored at reggae as some gays tend to be, but Christina's accompanied guest verse here make some desperate matters well worth their choices.  Anyway, Right Moves s a good song. Stream it!
62
63Like I Do ft. Goldlink: 10 There are few songs in our modern musical canon as sleek as Like I Do, and that alone makes the song possess a beauty that leaves it deserving of the surprise nomination it snatched from the Grammys. Upon hearing the magic of Liberation fof for first time, Like I Do just managed to be one of those songs that stood out in almost every way almost immediately. GoldLink's verse at the beginning is atypical, but smooth, sensual, witty and perfect in combining both old and new: Christina continues the brilliant of Like I Do by carrying it on with a sassy, confident energy that proves she can put her heart into efforts that don't involve nothing more than belting into a microphone. There is a reference to Marvin Gaye that's unfortunately similar to something of a greater evil, but that's nothing compared to all the life Like I Do exudes.
64
65Deserve: 7 Deserve is the most divisive song from LIberation, at least from my observations, and I can see why. When you take into account the track's robotic chorus, which reminds one just a little bit of PC Music, and when you consider the implications behind what Christina is singing about when she describes hurting her lover out of spite, Deserve can sound a little too cold, unusual, and uncomfortable. Perhaps this was the intention behind it as a song. These elements, however, whilst alienating me just a little bit, also fascinate me quite considerably. Liberation is one of Christina's most unique albums sonically, and while this track can approach murky territory for me, I can at least admire the fact that said territory is interesting.
66
67Twice: 9.5 Christina Aguilera hails from a time in pop music where ballads dominated radio thanks to the vocal capacities of the artists performing them, a quality which has made some people dismiss the concept of slow pop songs as a whole due to the intense amount of oversaturation such a strategic move naturally results in. Twice, however, is proof that Christina, despite her infamous reputation as a woman who can produce shrieks to end all other shrieks, is thoughtful and talented enough to pull a ballad off without resorting to such cheap tactics. Every aspect of Twice, including its lyricism, production, and backing piano instrumental, all come together to lead such a heartwrenching song that Christina's excellent vocal execution to top it all off can be simply too gorgeous for many listeners to comprehend. Twice makes use of the best imagery and techniques possible, and it's the best kind of ballad we could have hoped for.
68
69Accelerate ft. Ty Dolla Sign and 2 Chainz: 8.5 Accelerate has just so much chaotic potential within it (not surprising, actually, when you take into account that it's a Kanye song produced in 2018) that some, including me, find it impossible not to like. Maybe some people who're also obsessed with writing long comments nobody actually reads will try to argue why it's actually an objective work of musical genius, but that's not what I want to do. The reason why Accelerate is so amazing is not because it's good, of because it's bad. The reason why Accelerate is so amazing is because it's Accelerate. Peek into the gap that leads into the circle of hell where us poor homosexuals will end up going and you will hear Christina's non-chorus echoing throughout the walls, only supplemented by Ty Dolla Sign's 'ANOTHER SHOT, YOU COMING HOME WITH ME'. This is what it's like to be God and the devil at once. This is what it's like to be being itself. Oh, and by the way, does Ty actually appear in this rate twice? Maybe he's the secret to immortality.
70
71Pipe ft. XNDA: 9 I don't advocate smoking if it's not for sensual detective fiction cosplay (don't ask) but some way or the other I've just fallen in love with Pipe. I have no idea how Christina picked up a professional racer to sing so well, but Lewis Hamilton and Christina have so much chemistry together that they create a mellow, slow yet satisfactory atmosphere that fills Pipe with such bliss to the point where it ends up becoming a song I adore, even if it doesn't have too much substance to it from a thematic perspective. I suspect that Pipe will be overlooked, because it seems destined to me to be a hidden little gem, and I'm sad to say that I'll just have to cope with that.
72
73Masochist: 7 Masochist is probably the hardest song on Liberation for me to write about, even taking the album's opening instrumental into account. There's nothing too special about this track, aside from it being a nice break into simple singing before we get to the finishing ballad of this record. I guess it continues the (potentially troublesome?) theme of toxic relationships on Liberation, which is a little weird, considering the song after this is an anthem for newlyweds, but that doesn't bother me too much. I think I'm just happy Christina's not doing any unnecessary belting here, honestly.
74
75Unless it's With You: 8.5 Unless Is With You is another example of how Christina can contribute some genuinely amazing ballads, and it's no surprise that she used the song as an open chance for fans to propose to each other during the Liberation Tour. I have no knowledge of whether Christina is a married woman or not, and I'm too lazy to do research about whether this song's lyrics have any semblance of personal biography to them (with that being said, I hope they do) but Christina has managed to strike a very fulfilling brand of intimacy and emotional satisfactions with this track. In a way, Unless Is With You is a fantastic ending to an album full of self-doubt, and I happen to be saying this as an aromantic person who is probably never getting married!
76
77Album: Honey: Honey is an album that I didn't quite get during 2018, but it's an album I'm also warming up quite a lot to. Taking disco's systematic beats and electropop's masterful use of synths, Robyn forgoes exciting people like she did with Dancing On My Own on Honey, and uses what she has for the purpose of breaking down our conceptions of what it means to make pop perfection in this modern day and age and creating a work that's all a just bit operatic. I used to have no love for these aspects of Honey, because I thought they played in with how slow the record was, but as time went by, I've learned to appreciate everything Robyn says or does throughout its forty minutes runtime. The girl sure doesn't lack punch. There are many things I could say about Honey, but for now, I'm content with just thinking that it's a magnificent work of art.
78
79Missing U: 9.5 Missing U is not as experimental as some of Honey's other prominent tracks (the only other song off this record that's as accessible as it is Honey, and that's a display of beauty and sensuality that happens to transcend taste) and for that it reason it may seem paradoxical. It's not as reliant on production as Honey's backbone is going to be, but at the same time, its relatively straightforward foray into pop is a factor that makes initial listeners convinced enough to continue hearing what Robyn will have to say. As a composition on its own, Missing U is, indeed, already close to perfection. Contrasting its sacred atmosphere with  its lyrical sense of emptiness, Robyn's pronounced accent adds flair and personality to her performance, creating a universal anthem sure to appease everybody giving Honey a try for the first time. Brave, passionate and exciting, the song succeeds in making you look forward to the rest of the record it begins.
80
81Human Being ft. Zhala: 8 I'm sometimes guilty of liking songs for conceptual reasons at times rather than judging them based on their music, and I use this same troublesome technique in evaluating Human Being, which I should really feel bothered by, although I do take comfort in the fact that the more I listen to it, the more I think every bit of the song relies on Robyn's performance. Human Being isn't really interesting musically past superficially resembling a human heartbeat, but Robyn expands that and paints a shockingly apocalyptic picture ('a dying race') and makes reference to this record's honey motif by claiming that there's no more of it to be had. It's a surprisingly literary song, and what's best about it is that it works past the pitching board!
82
83Because It's The Music: 9 The best thing is about synth-heavy music is that when producers and artists genuinely try to aim for creativity, they can make their synths sound special, as if they're things that go beyond the limitations of being no more than products of a metal machine. Because It's In The Music is a magnificent example of what I'm talking about. Filled with a lush wall of music that's reminiscent of an orchestra (and it is, indeed, here where Honey seems to take on a thematic cohesiveness) every echo of an instrument works with Robyn's voice to create a regretful nostalgia trip of stunning proportions. Whether they take on the role of violins, flutes, or drums, the synths in  this song are responsible for bringing everything else involved in it to life.
84
85Baby Forgive Me: 8 Baby, Forgive Me is not as easy of a song to get into as many others in Honey or Robyn's discography, and that's because it's a song that only becomes as good as it is when you appreciate its totality. Forming a sort of narrative trilogy with Send to Robyn Immediately and Honey, the emotional capacity Robyn displays where is incredibly fascinating. Forgiveness on its own is a powerful trigger for an audience reaction that most media creators woefully ignore, and here such thoughts are combined with a sort of subtle sensuality and skeptical show of innocence that you'll find a lot to unpack from all the simple statements Robyn makes here on their own. Telling the song's subject to be brave, wise, and 'nice', Baby, Forgive Me is a reminder to us all that Honey indeed has a human element to it; one has to wonder if homo sapiens really is the dying race within the world Robyn lives in, considering it's such good music.
86
87Send To Robin Immediately: 9 If it weren't for the lush beauty of Honey's title track, the contrarian in me may have been big enough to call Send To Robyn Immediately the best track off the album. That sounds like a deliberately provocative statement, but do I really seem like I'm just trying to get people's attention when I describe just how beautiful this song is despite how it's essentially a glorified interlude? I already love it just because of its title, which reads like a tongue-in-cheek acknowledgement of Robyn's iconic image and artistic identity, but it's the urgent and increasingly desperate backing synths of Send To Robyn Immediately that make it sound like the song has its own pulse. Coupled with a handful of absolutely golden hooks from Robyn that seduce her listeners right back in to Honey's narrative, there's a surprising amount of brilliance within this track that make it fit for being a transmission in between Baby, Forgive Me and the record's theme song. It's the perfect median in the midst of the opera.
88
89Honey: 10 You know what? As a substance, honey is actually kind of gross. Sure, it tastes sweet, but the compound's stickiness is by no means pleasant to experience, and to the tongue biased towards artificial sweeteners, honey can be just as welcome as a sea of cool, sugary lava running down your throat. As a song, Honey uses similar imagery that's supposed to sound disgusting on paper, even  making Robyn sing the words 'saliva' and 'soak up into the flesh' and having us magically enjoy this. And here's what's so amazing about Honey; the word 'honey' makes us think of a golden paradise more than what a spoonful of it actually tastes like nowadays, and that's just what Honey as a song does. It hides the pain of being lonely and the struggle to cope by channeling an unearthly, ethereal musical flow, and the end result is the creation of a grater totality of beauty than actual honey could ever hope to achieve. I might be rooting for Mariah, but I will grudgingly admit that Honey might be the best candidate for our crown that's realistically likely enough to snatch it.
90
91Between The Lines: 9 I've seen Honey described as a post-disco record before, and while I'm not familiar with what that description entails, I can clearly see the influence disco has on Honey as entire album. Between the Lines is one of the greatest displays of all the good this heritage creates. A funky, sexual track that relies more on ambiguity and rhythm than any other song on the album, the song sounds like something that could be played in a club from the 70s updated for our modern times without losing what makes its aura special. Given this subreddit's mixed thoughts on the funk elements artists like Ariana Grande have been including in their music recently, I'm a bit worried about how this will fare, but come what may be, I can still appreciate it.
92
93Beach2k20: 8 Beach 2k18 really is one of the most baffling musical decisions I've ever seen, and I don't mean to say that in either a critical or a complementary way. There's so much to appreciate here, and I'm actually mad at myself for only intellectually realizing his instead of emotionally and spiritually doing the same. Who thought that Robyn trying to set up a beach date for five straight minutes by repeating the same line over and over again would be a good idea for a penultimate track? Nobody knows the identity of such a madperson, but there's a case for this song to be made if you reacted as displeasingly as I did to it; in Beach 2k18, the weirdly funky yet unnatural synths that accompany Robyn are representations of aspects of the woman's anxious feelings. Resulting in a repetitive psuedo-dance track that will confuse your average casual listener, I can guarantee that either you'll love Beach 2k18, or you'll be sad you don't. Sorry! I make the rules.
94
95Ever Again: 10 Robyn closes Honey, one of the few critically beloved albums of 2018, by stating that she's only going to sing silly love songs from now on until the rest of her days. Lord knows how this probably isn't true, but that's what Ever Again is, and the honest truth of the manner is that Ever Again is beautiful. Whether Robyn's prediction concerning that aspect of her life is true or not, her soft, dreamy whispers on Ever Again as a track are prone to convince you that the lady's just fooled herself, and that she'll get into the heavens easily. Ever Again as a whole strikes the delicate balance between hurt and hope, and personally, I'm here for it!
96
97BONUS TRACKS
98
99Lost Without You:
100
101Every Little Part Of Me:
102
103Rollin:
104
105Low Blow:
106
107Runway:
108
109I Don't ft. YG:
110
111The Star:
112
113Say Something:
114
115Feel This Moment:
116
117Do It Again:
118
119Sayit:
120
121Monument:
122
123END