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10104 4:08 Weekly_Mu
2A bright light of unknown origin was spotted last night during rush hour near the Vitus River. Several videos were taken but no official explanation has been given by The City. Full story and video at site.
3
40104 7:47 itisfrog
5Vitus Docks on fire. Don't go there.
6
70104 8:02 Weekly_Mu
8City released and official statement regarding the strange light seen at 6:12 on Jan 28th through the stating that while its origins are currently unknown, it is not an attack from a foreign power and there is nothing to be concerned about. Full story at site.
9
10Mu_Underground Replying to Weekly_Mu 8:07
11Any connection to shut down of Vitus Dock area is 'conjecture'? The river has been having issues with ice due to the recent cold front but several disturbing photos of fucked up ice weirdness have been posted in this very reply chain. 
12
13Mu_Underground Replying to Weekly_Mu 8:08
14This is just more proof of your 'journalists' being under the thumb of city hall.  And no I'm not downloading your fucking app.
15
160104 9:02 Vitus_Ferry
17#CurrentConditions as of 10:00am All sailings cancelled for Jan 4th. Please stay posted for when service will resume. Check conditions at site. No refunds.
18
190104 10:32 Vitus_Ferry
20#CurrentConditions The bay is not on fire. It's just melting. For refunds please contact City Hall.
21
220104 23:00 Weekly_Mu
23Incident at Vitus Docks strand passengers. Tempers flare over refund policy. Full story and video at site.
24
25Ah, another fun day on the internet. 
26
27David held his terrible office machine coffee in one hand, his phone in another as he read last page of the latest print job. 
28
29SIGN: Look, I know you don't like this but you were the first person on the scene and we have to get some sort of statement from you.
30FROG: (gesturing that is not officially recognized under any nation's sign language)
31SIGN: When you arrived at the Vitus Docks what did you see?
32FROG: (inaudible)
33SIGN: You know you aren't supposed to use your official account for messages that might cause panic. You've been warned about this before. 
34FROG: (inaudible)
35SIGN: You could at least take off the helmet for this so we could hear you.
36FROG: (much more vehement gestures) (possible muffled swearing)
37SIGN: Please just fill out the form.
38END OF TRANSCRIPT
39
40The problem with basing your hiring process on 'somehow obtained superpowers' was that many of those under the employ of the Department of Justice Headquarters were eclectic, to use the polite term. David had seen Frog's face only once. She had then punched him.
41
42Lilli J. Lee, although never to be called that to her face, had at some point gained the ability to produce repellent force fields. Her 'work uniform' consisted of a highly modified frog-based mascot costume that covered riot gear, all originally purchase online, now replaced semi-yearly on the city's dime.
43
44She was a strange, violent woman who got away with a lot due to decades of seniority, but she was fast, durable, and the only one who actually volunteered to patrol the city when the temperature went sub-zero. Which was about November to April if they were lucky.
45
46Gerald Sign, on the other hand, was new. New enough he still tried to get the Frog to do things she didn't want to. He'd either quit in the next few months or get sent to somewhere he didn't interact with the talent. David just hoped it wasn't archives.
47
48The printer chattered its ancient beeping grind as more jobs came in. David waited until it had shuddered to a halt then ripped the perforated sides to start sorting. 
49
5001050101 Transcript of Interview with Alleged Intergalactic Alien
51
52Hmm.
53
54David's phone beeped.
55
56He read the text.
57
58Of course, just because dealing with the talent wasn't officially in the job description didn't mean David wouldn't be dragged into doing it.
59*
60
61He already had learned the basics of the English language (among several others) in preparation for this mission. That data had been gathered from signals Earth had blasted out from their planet over the preceding decades. Still, important aspects had been missed.
62Like how to write a name on a sheet of paper.
63The pencil was difficult to hold. He had too many digits now, yet too few limbs. Dragging graphite on paper was such an ancient method of durable communication. He could understand the appeal, but this thin shape seemed impossible to manipulate within the confined space he'd been given. 
64When the man with red hair explained he did not need to use every finger in manipulation, that helped. When he demonstrated that helped more. The physical positioning of his fingers upon the stylus was forward, but necessary, for it helped the most.
65"Sorry, but the bastards at top really wants you do fill it out yourself." The man shrugged. "Fingerprints are next by the way."
66Now that he could write legibly it was simply a matter of choosing the correct words for his new designation. He had long ago discarded the notion of translating his birth name into a combination of letters English-readers would understand. Few human languages seemed to make the correct sounds, nor even have ways to transmit them. None attempted the layers of other information he would normally be expected to present for identification.
67So he would simply chose a name that already existed. 
68The red-headed man frowned. "Don't use that one."
69"Why?" There was a useful, sadly unavailable for use as a name. He suspected he would use it often. "It is a common name."
70The man hummed. "Just try something else. That's not a good one."
71Albert the Second had been, according to pre-landing research, the first named creature to have entered space from the Earth. What else could be more appropriate for the first visitor from space?
72He recalled his notes. Perhaps the fact Albert had died on re-entry was inauspicious? 
73He could choose the name of a human. There was Yuri Alekseyevich Gagarin, the first man in space. He had also survived this important event.
74The man hummed again. "Not bad, but you can't just take someone's whole name, though. At least if they're famous." He reached over, very close, and erased much of what had been written. "That'll work as a fake last name, now just add a first name."
75Why was this process so tediously difficult?
76He thought. He went over options. 
77These sort of decisions were not supposed to have been made by him. This was all supposed to be handled by--
78But they were missing. Everyone was. He was alone.
79He finally said: "Please help."
80The red-haired man took a large intake of breath before slumping his shoulders. "Right, okay I'm sorry. This is probably pretty shitty for you, isn't it?" 
81The man held out his right hand. "My name is David Morel. I'm pretty sure my parents put less thought into it than you're having to."
82David looked at him, then after a moment reached to grab the hand that didn't hold a pencil. 
83The skin of David's hand had a soft yet firm texture. Palmar creases and fingerprints added grip. If he focused he could almost sense the movement of blood as it pumped through the circulatory system, but nothing more. The digits of the hands did not move. They simply held each other.
84They held hands until David let go. "Okay. Right. So you seem to want something space-related? I'd suggest you don't go with Buzz."
85"It has a good sound."
86David hummed again. It seemed to not be meant as actual communication, even if so far it sounded the most like it. An item was taken from the coat pocket. 
87Oh! A tactical information device! It lit up with a touch, and with brisk movements pictures and words flashed.
88Why could thy not have given him one of those instead of those piece of rock?
89"If you like Gagarin, let's look him up. Maybe you can find something related—" A moving grainy video opened, the low voice of a man rumbling through distortion coming from hidden speakers. "Shit, finger slipped."
90'Gagarin in space: "Jules Bergman announces and explains the event", ABC News Special, April 12, 1961'
91"Can I use his name?"
92*
93David was almost at the end of a very long, very weird day. He just needed to drop Mr. Space Invader off at the residential wing and he could drown himself at the pub six blocks down. "This is your key, both to this room and to the building. Don't lose it. We have to re-do the whole system if you lose it."
94
95Everyone lost it. A man from the Orion Belt (or something like that) would surely be no different.
96
97"I will be careful." The newly name Jules Gagarin held the flat white card with two fingers, then raised it to his ear as if listening. 
98
99Well, maybe he was.
100
101"Touch it to the black box by the door." David gestured with his chin, then his hand when Jules only stared.
102
103A tap, a beep, and the door clicked open.
104
105The employee rooms were pretty standard. Small enough to encourage you to find something better in the city but not so small it felt rude. A nice little window with blinds and no curtains. A bed. Some flat board furniture, most of which David had assembled. Light pink carpet. Beige walls that didn't work that well with pink carpet. Someone had attempted a wallpaper boarder in this room. Then someone had attempted to remove it.
106
107"This will be your room. Nothing too fancy. Bed here, closest there." Damn, David would have to find more clothes tomorrow. Or maybe that would be someone else's job once word of their new guest got out. "Bathroom is through that door."
108
109David knew, he did, that it was probably his responsibility here to make sure the strange alien knew how to use a toilet, but he hesitated and was thankfully saved by Jules asking a question.
110
111"I am to be alone?"
112
113Thank fuck. The guy had been interviewed for hours, surely he'd had to use one already? Yeah, sure. New topic.
114
115"Yup, lucky you. We have enough empties to hand them out to anyone that comes by. Be happy you didn't show up three years ago, the overflow dorms are terrible." Overflow was a long corridor of bunks sunk into the walls. More like people closets than rooms. Capacity for forty people and only one washroom. Which was two floors down.
116
117"Dorms?" It was possible that Jules's face brightened but it was hard to tell. "I would like to stay there with the other guests."
118
119"But, they kinda suck. And there's no one else down there now."
120
121"Oh." Jules didn't so much frown, but his face went back to that blankness he'd had all day. "So I am to be alone here?"
122
123"You have neighbours." Again, maybe David saw Jules perk up. Not in any way he could describe like say: 'oh he smiled', or 'his eyebrows went up'. Just a sense of alertness he couldn't place. "The three other rooms on this floor belong to the Pink Crew. They don't live here full time, Ms. Kirke owns a condo in the city, but if they're here, you'll know."
124
125David inched backwards to the door. He was almost free. Almost. 
126
127"It is so quiet here."
128Err, crap. David side stepped towards the junky television that sat on a rickity plywood storage box. Click click, there it was. "You said you studied Earth using television, yes?"
129
130On the screen a mermaid sung about her hording habit. Right, a classic. Good.
131"I have seen parts of this," Jules said. The guy's attention had turned to the screen at least.
132Okay, one last attempt to be a good peron then David was out for the night. "If you need anything just go back the way we came up here and there'll be a security guard you can ask, opkay?"
133Jules glanced away from the television. "The nearest person is three flors down."
134"Yeah, not far." His hand was on the door, he was almost free. 
135"Don't worry," he said, before catching himself. It was a stupid platitude, and the odds David would even see the guy much after this were low. No point giving false expectation. "You'll be fine on your own." He left it at that. 
136*
137David was very wrong. He saw the guy a lot. Constantly. Every day. It was getting weird.
138"I apologise but I do not understand what this means," Jules would ask after standing iotuside David's office until David gave up stopped his work and let him in.
139It was a form. Ow, subjecting a space alien to legaleeze was evil.
140Jules had circled the offending wors in pencil.
141David had work, realy he did, but Jules looked at him with alarmingly big eyes and an expression that was almost a frown. He was kinda shit at ex[ressions sp far. It reminded David of that robot he'd seen on the news. Not opne of the blowing things up types but in a science center in Japan somewhere that where they were trying really hard to gfigure out how to replicate all thse annoying muscle in the human face but juist not there yet.
142It freaked people out, the news had said. Called the effect the uncanny valley.
143It was kinda cute.
144"Okay," David said with a long suffering sigh of one who knew they would regret kindness when they were several hours into overtime. "But you owe me a coffee for this."
145*
1460109 10:04 Vitus_Ferry
147The coffee hut will be replaced. Eventually. For complaints please contact City Hall.
148Mu_Underground Replying to Vitus_Ferry 10:11
149Can you confirm that an extra-terrestrial space craft destroyed the coffee hut?
1500109 12:04 Vitus_Ferry
151For information on the coffee hut's untimely demise, please contact City Hall.
152MariaK420 Replying to Vitus_Ferry 14:11
153Memorial for Coffee Hut when.
154*
155Jules brought him coffee. He brought a lot of coffee.
156"I have been assigned work," he said one day, while delivering a macchiato something something. "In exchange for aiding in the city's defence I am to be granted living space, a monetary stipend."
157"That's great?" said David, who really should have been working but, free coffee. Wait, how had Jules been paying for coffee before—
158"Would it be possible to tell me how I could acquire a cell phone?"
159"Yeah, sure, that'll be necessary for work. I can—" David was cut off by his own phone beeping and booping.
160Komarov: Who's your new cute friend?
161Maria Komarov was reception. Technically David was her supervisor but really she ran the place, he'd just been there longer. Every once in a while she tried to gossip with him. Be friendly. David usually just ignored it. It was weird. Talking to people was weird. But he did also need to stay on her good side.
162David: he's a space alien
163Komarov: Okay, is he single?
164David glanced up at the space alien who was probably a robot inside a human suit, currently trying to hold a pen and fill out a phone acquisition form. The pen wobbled a little. Jules made a pained noise.
165David: Pretty sure
166*
167The phone showed up quick, but for some reason it showed up at David's office. So Jules came by again, with coffee, and a muffin. "The nice woman at the entry desk asked if I was courting you, what does that mean?"
168"Uh." David's hands paused with the scissors partially stabbing the amazon box. "What?"
169"She seemed to believe this because I bring you food."
170"But what does it mean?"
171"Well, you know, trying to date someone." 
172"I have heard of the term. It is romance?" He asked this like someone worried they were ordering breakfast in a foreign language and worried they'd get laughed at.
173"I guess?" David stabbed the package, hopefully not puncturing the phone. The sooner he got this set up the sooner Jules could google this shit. "You know, getting married, stuff like that."
174"No."
175David looked up. "No?"
176"I know of it," Jules amended. "From research."
177"What, space aliens don't get married?"
178"No."
179"Oh, well then Maria's going to be disappointed, I suppose." And he thought no more of it other than how it rather confirmed his suspicions of robots until he had the dang phone out of its insanely tight plastic packaging.
180"Thank you," said Jules taking the phone, instruction manual and charger. He studied it a moment then, "is it important for Humans to be married? I had thought perhaps that aspect of your ficton was as exaggerated as the rest appeared to be."
181"Eh?"
182"I have found it difficult to discern what elements are fanciful and which are reality when consuming your fiction."
183"Like what?"
184"Women who are partially fish who are able to trade oral communication for the ability to integrate with above ocean society but only if they are able to gain romantic affection within a time limit."
185"Oh. Yeah that's made up." David shrugged. "Well, then again, you never know. Mu is a weird place. We get people with wacky superpowers every week. Fish people could happen someday."
186"Yes, this is a very strange nation when compared to others on the planet."
187"I mean, it's not the only place people are born with weird powers, it's just, you know."
188"Your country has an immigration system preferential to those with extraordinary abilities."
189"Yeah, that."
190"Is this why I have been so readily accepted?" Jules turned the phone around in his hand. "It had been assumed that if we were discovered we would be incarcerated, instead everyone has been quite kind. Even your monarch has taken a personal interest in my well being."
191Well that was probably why everyone had been so nice. The King probably thought of Jules has his shiny new toy. A real space alien? Of course he'd be all over that. If it probably wouldn’t cause an international incident the King would probably tell every world leader out there. Hey look at me, I'm friends with Earth's first known space alien. Oh wait please do not try to invade us to capture him. Oh shit. Oh no.
192Although, really, it was weird this guy was being let loose with almost no supervision. 
193Then again, the King had his own ways o knowing what people were up to.
194*
195"I have been researching kissing," Jules announced one morning, because of course he did.
196Several possible replies skittered and crashed inside David's mind before he managed: "Oh, really."
197Jules had on the oversized sweater he'd ordered from some shady online marketplace (with help from The Frog) and damn it, he looked too good in it to be showing up at 9pm on a Friday to discussing kissing. "It seems to be a complicated subject."
198Well, David could multitask paperwork and alien educational talks about touchy subjects. Better yet, he could deflect. "You haven't just been reading Wikipedia articles on your phone, have you?"
199Jules clutched his phone, which he had gotten a decorative iridescent case for some time in the last week (David also suspected The Frog) tight to his chest. "I like my phone."
200He had a clavicle exposed. It was nice. "The problem isn't your phone, it's the reliance on that site—" Look at paperwork. Not at neck.
201"I like that website." He was pouting. When had he learned how to pout? Who had dared to teach him that?
202Right, fund request this box. Budget copy this box. Angry email print-out this box. "If you want to learn about Human culture you're going to need more depth on the subject than wiki diving can get you."
203"I was going to ask you."
204Repeated fund request—
205Okay, maybe he couldn't deflect. "You what."
206Jules started tapping away at his phone. "Kissing closely resembles an important form of communication used by my species in a standard manner, yet the terms of use and meaning seem to vary greatly depending on the Earth culture and time in history.  On my planet the act is considered part of our genetic instincts, but I wonder if the range of meaning on Earth is because Humans are limited in their sense of smell."
207David had not understood half of that. "Our what now?"
208Jules's tapping slowed. "Human communication appears to be almost entirely verbal and visual.  Any chemical component seems to be limited and wholly uncontrolled."
209Oh. Okay. At least they were off kissing. "Well, there's perfume."
210Jules froze. Even the fidgeting finger stopped tapping and swiping. "There is what?'
211"Perfume, smelly shit you spray on yourself. It's a billion dollar industry?" There, good, he was being informative and distracting. "Unless you mean pheromones."
212"I did but," Jules trailed off. The tapping began anew.
213Maybe. Hopefully, David had given Jules something to go google long enough he would forget about kissing.
214No, Jules never forgot anything. "Also, the human nose is comparatively limited in picking up scent vibrations so I wondered if the act of kissing was necessary to involve taste."
215"Yes, we are very inadequate." Wait "Scent isn't a vibration."
216"Scent is a vibration."
217"No."
218For a moment silence. Then: "This explains much."
219
220"Jules," David said after another short silence. "Thank you for explaining how much Humans suck once again, but I do have work to do today."
221
222Right, that was what was important here, work. David had work. Jules maybe had work. Had he been sent out to fight recently? If so he had forms to fill. 
223
224"I'm sorry! I did not mean that. I did not mean that insultingly. Please do not be angry. You smell perfectly well." Jules said it all so fast, too fast, tumbling over the words and—
225As much as Jules would deny if called on it, he was never particularly subtle that his biology was different than a humans. David's current top theory was that he was some sort of robot.
226
227Apparently a robot with a very important sense of smell.
228
229Humans sucked at smell. Robots apparently sucked at not being rude. Maybe Jules was excreting some pheromone that was going "Hey man, I'm just curious. No offence meant. Please don't hate me." 
230
231If so then when David felt he was missing half the conversation with Jules because he really was, wasn't he?
232
233Or maybe Jules was just an awkward fuck. David sniffed while trying to not look like he was sniffing. He smelled nothing.
234
235Eh, if Jules gave off any vibes it was that of a big dumb puppy.  Right now, possibly a puppy who had just gotten the spray bottle but didn't know why.
236
237Fine, time to bite the bullet. Why was he even so flustered about this? Just because it had been so long? Just because of what, he was worried Jules would ask for a demonstration. Just because a tiny part of him had from the start of this conversation perhaps wanted Jules to ask for a demonstration? "What is it you wanted to ask me? It better not be for a kiss."
238
239"Ah," said Jules, the sound drawn out and long. hen much more quickly he continued with: "But in the local culture kissing is generally practised between romantic couples. Unless you consider me a romantic interest?"
240
241David only managed a vague noise at that.
242
243"Would you like to go to dinner tonight?"
244
245Uh. Um. "Are you allowed outside of the building on your own yet?"
246
247"No," replied Jules. "But if we are going together I would not be alone."
248
249Touche. "That's true—"
250
251"Good!" There went Jules's fingers, tapping a storm again. "Pink Falcon says Gyoza Hut is open twenty four hours, is almost abandoned after 10pm, and has an excellent selection. Also it is easily accessible through the Tilestreet underground corridor which mean we will only be outside for less than four minutes. As the current temperature is -34 and there are high winds, staying outside for longer periods would be unadvised for your health."
252
253"Mine as well," Jules added after a second.
254
255An understatement. Jules had seemed much less inclined to the winter than David, who had grown up with it. Humans: bad at smell, much better than whatever Jules was at cold. "Yeah, okay."
256
257Jules retreated before David could say anything else. He was gone long enough for David to finish enough work to argue he'd tried. He'd really tried.
258
259Jules returned with a cardboard box full of winter gear, already half layered himself. David's stuff was there, snatched from the office closet. 
260
261David never did find out what Jules had been planning on asking him, but at least the gyoza was ok and the conversation was much less fraught once on the topic of conversation was funny videos on Jules's phone and not kissing. There were no other customers around to ask, but if anyone had David would argue he squished into Jules's side of the booth it was just to see the phone screen better. And he only tried to sniff Jules's hair once.
262
263*
264This was the information Jules had gathered:
265
266David had been born thirty four years ago to Agnes and Benjamin Morel, their fourth and final child. The first had died at age two of accidental drowning. The surviving eldest and third had been put in foster care before David's birth. The younger had died of an overdose at age fifteen. The elder aged out of the system and their current whereabouts were difficult to ascertain.
267
268David ran away at age seventeen. His disappearance was reported by his school, not his parents.
269
270He re-appeared two years later being arrested for, but not charged with, shoplifting.
271
272One month later he was questioned for assault. Again there were no charges.
273
274Then nothing until he re-appeared under investigation involving money laundering at a popular downtown club later discovered to be owned and used as a front by Alberto Montebello's gang.
275 
276Eleven years ago he was in a jail cell awaiting interrogation on tax evasion charges when the Downtown Incident occurred. The club this investigation circled around had been located on one of the blocks destroyed. Jules was unsure if that information was relevant but he kept it in mind.
277
278Nine years ago David was convicted and sent to prison for three years. He served just over two.
279
280This was when his employment records at Justice Headquarters began.
281
282Jules leaned back against the cool concrete wall behind his bed. There were too many important gaps. The dates and actions did not give him the whys. Even the hows were too bare.
283
284But if he asked David, then David would be angry with him. If he asked anyone else, it was unlikely they would know, and also, David would be angry with him.
285
286He knew by now that most would say: 'It's not your business.'
287
288Understanding Humans and evaluating them was the whole purpose of Jules's being here. It was his business. How could he determine the capability of an entire species if he was unable to understand the life of one person? Jules had been selected specifically for his curiosity and drive. 
289
290Even if he was alone now, even if he had no way of relaying his findings home—
291
292He still had a mission. Others may come. A means of contacting home could be found.
293
294Besides, David had begun to act strangely. He had stopped leaving the Justice Headquarters Main Complex sixteen days ago. Before that, he had left daily, multiple times daily, regardless of weather or time. Now he refused to leave for anything. His excuses, plausible at first, had become increasingly implausible.
295
296It was not, as Jules had selfishly worried at first, an attempt to avoid himself. David had previously left the building most often on his own, and David was still amicable to accompanying Jules to places as long as they did not go outside. Jules's room was fine, the nearby coffee shops were not.
297
298He had either become agoraphobic, or something else was keeping him indoors.
299The past did not end. It became the future. To find out what threatened David now, Jules had to know what had happened before.
300* Jules held the printout in his left hand, studying the gray-scaled image. They had colour printers here. Surely the features would be more discernible in colour. Had they printed him this way on purpose?
301Jules had noted the named first. He knew what that meant. Why David hovered beside him trying to snatch the papers, a mixture of nervous and irritated. Humans seemed to combine emotions in such interesting ways. Confusing, but interesting.
302"This was your previous lover?" Jules asked in the rhetorical manner he had heard others do. He already knew. David knew he knew. But the social mores of this region required it be stated aloud to introduce the topic before Jules could ask the questions he truly wanted answered.
303David yanked the printout away. "Was. You'll note the 'deceased' status. Look, I'm fine with dinner tonight but I need to get some work done first, and if you lot are going to suddenly go physical copy on the Records Department—"
304"He was missing half his face."
305Those words caused David's own face—normally formed, only marred by scars on the bridge of the nose and left cheek and brown specks related to reckless sun exposure but still on the higher scale of conventional attractiveness in as near as Jules's research could indicate--to turn away. Now his words were clipped. "Yes. Hard to miss, that."
306"But you still loved him." A statement, but with a clearly encoded question.
307"At least until he killed over a hundred people." David shuffled the files far too forcefully than needed. Oh, Jules's curiosity had led him into error. Now David was mad at him. "You know what, Jules. I may not be able to finish work in time for dinner after all. See you tomorrow." 
308Before Jules had time to parse and counter this change in plans—mostly likely solution: apologise even if unsure of what apologising for--David had already shut the door to his office and drawn the blinds. 
309At least Jules understood better than to go after him when he did that. 
310*
311Two hours later Jules sat in the bar he had meant to visit with David, although it was the Falcon Crew who surrounded him. 
312"You asked him about what?" Pink Falcon, legal name Bonnie Kirke, slammed a drink down with a laugh that was clearly not genuine. It had been she who had suggested Jules take David to this location, and had been sitting at the back with her companions when Jules had walked in alone. Jules now suspected the suggestion had been some sort of set up, but that did not matter now. "Jules, you really are some sort of space alien."
313Jules was getting much better at frowning when appropriate. "I've said such multiple times."
314Little Pink, legal name: Rickie Kirke, shook his head. "You can't ask those sorts of things, man."
315"But I want to know," Jules replied. "It is obvious Humans place enormous value on physical perfection, so what would make David overcome the natural instinct of revulsion—"
316Pink Falcon's right covered his mouth, decorated nails pinching against his cheek. "Okay I'm going to cut you off right there before you insult more people."
317Falcon X, legal name unknown, took over, using the sarcastic tones he always did when explaining things to anyone not Pink Falcon. The practice was strongly irritating, as was the way he looked at Jules over his glasses, as if seeing Jules less meant something. More irritating was the possibility it did. Falcon X's powers were not fully cataloged. "While it's possibly you come from a planet of supermodels, on this planet not everyone is so blessed as to be born with and retain Hollywood good looks. Yet still we manage to find dates. People can fall for personality as much as physical details."
318The phrasing of 'physical details' seemed to understate the man in question's situation. Sometimes alias Vulcan, legal name Alberto Montebello: small time crook with a smattering of arrests and releases until an incident at an experimental chemical factory melted off 8% of his mass, replacing it with a substance no researchers had been able to explain during his subsequent turns in high-security prison.
319This matter melded with his nervous system, allowing him to control molten matter with his mind to a distance of several meters. The flesh that had been melted had never healed. It had been noted the area around the mystery substance would be re-burnt upon use of powers.
320Regardless such abilities led to Vulcan's quick rise in the underworld, curtailed only by his death.
321How David had come to be involved with the criminal Jules had not completely pieced together. It was one of the many things he wanted to ask about, but the more he learned the more it seemed he was supposed to keep his mouth shut and stew in his curiosity.
322"Regardless." Pink Falcon took away her hand. "Even if David's ex had been hotter than hell—"
323Little Pink snickered. Falcon X glared.
324"—You don't ask shit like that about an ex. Actually, don't ask about exes. Just don't do it. If you banged half the galaxy before landing here David wouldn't want to hear about it, so don't ask about him either. Especially about stupid shit like his ex being an ugly fucker. They guy blew up three blocks of rush hour, that's all you need to remember about the asshole." Pink Falcon gestured for the bartender to come back. "Now shut up and drink something other than water."
325*
326An hour later, alone at his apartment in Justice Headquarters, Jules let the false skin peel away from his form and went over the day's conversations, wondering how he should have asked differently.
327*
328
329There was an envelope in David's desk. Right side. Bottom drawer. Where he hoarded bits of this and that. Dead pens. Erasers. Paper clips. Papers he might need someday. Garbage.
330
331An envelope that had arrived two weeks ago containing a ring. Plain, mid quality gold alloy. No markings other than and engraving on the inside: 'Davy.'
332
333He'd shoved it under the papers, slammed the drawer, and not opened it since.
334
335Now David stared out at the hallway through his offices indoor window and craved coffee that didn't come from the Justice Headquarters' machines.
336
337He was being stupid. Someone wanted to play a sick joke and here he was panicking about it. 
338He should just get his coat and shit, and go to the fucking fucking Starbucks across the block. Any of them.
339
340Or he could just sit there and debate either to use the nearby percolator or go five flights of stairs to commandeer the locker room Keurig.
341
342Maybe he could get Jules to go fetch take-out again. There'd be more questions about his recent disinclination towards going out, but otherwise—
343
344Sure, where was the phone?
345
346David had a text.
347
348Komarov: Boss incoming.
349
350Her reception desk was down the hall and around a corner at the entrance to the floor. Three small offices and a closet away. If the Boss stopped to talk to all of the employees like he normally did David would have enough time to—
351
352"Morrel, you're here," said King Jupiter Caelestis the 1st of Mu and Surrounding Waters.
353
354Fuck.
355
356If you didn't know who he was—although if you lived in the city it would be impossible not to what with the huge posters currently on every bus stop for the 30th anniversary of coronation—one might think he was just another business man.  Suit, flashy yet not too flashy. Pink and grey plaid tie Hair and short beard cut to the millimeter' precision. Shined black shoes. From the suit to the cufflinks, everything was custom made, and all cost about twenty times as much as you might think from a first glance. 
357
358David would know, he'd help with the King of Mu's expense reports when they'd gotten tricky. 
359"Usually am during working hours, Sir." The King liked his employees to act casual, to a point.
360
361The King's bodyguard of the day lingered outside the office door. Who was in The Nautilus's armor today? Whoever it was looked pretty damn bored, leaning against the door frame. Probably the new kid. Could talk to grass or something.
362
363The King collected people. Special people. Anyone with powers, of course, but other assets were valuable as well. Value wasn't just talent, but a good—which usually meant bad--story,  social capital, or just some whatever that caught his eye.
364
365"True. True." The King nodded for his bodyguard to wait outside.
366
367Damn, so it was going to be one of those meetings.
368
369"It's about my son."
370
371Oh fuck it was going to be one of <i>those</i> meetings.
372
373If not for the personal interests and mercy of his King, David knew he would have died in prison, but he wasn't so thankful as to be stupid. The King was smart enough, but his son was an idiot. An egotistical idiot who had cultivated a gang of yesmen to the point he thought he was the god his ancestors had claimed to be. 
374
375They had twenty years at the best until The King died. Less if, heaven forbid, his mental faculties started to decline and his offspring's sharks tasted weakness.
376
377Then, well what would be worse? In-fighting for the true power being the country or that idiot at the helm from the start? One of their enemies taking the opportunity to invade outright, or just grab power in a less obvious way?
378
379They were fucked, basically.
380
381The King knew it. But he wouldn't renounce his own blood. So it would happen anyway.
382
383"He's been showing interest in our new friend Mr. Gagarin. The boy seems fond of you so warn him off, would you?" He pushed at some of the files on David's desk. "As subtly as you can manage with him, of course."
384
385Yeah fuck, that sounded like a complete disaster. "I'll try."
386"Good, good." The King leaned against David's desk, one hand now on a specific file. "He seems to like you best. He'll listen to you."
387Ok, what the Hell did that mean? 
388Yes, Jules was a bit clingy, but David had assumed Jules was doing that with everyone. Jules seemed popular. He was always texting someone or other. Going out with someone. 
389The King smiled.
390Fine, he could text Jules under the pretense of getting grabbing them take-out, which he wanted anyway (you know, because it was so dang cold outside, yeah that was why) and try to explain the concept of autocrats, hereditary dictatorships while trying to make it subtle enough to not sound like treason to anyone overhearing, but blunt enough Jules knew what he was talking about. 
391Fun. 
392Well who knew, maybe Jules already had the concepts down. He hadn't said a damn thing about his own planet's politics. Did they have different countries? Wars? 
393"Ah, about that," interrupted The King. "There was another task I was planning on giving to you. Jules is a nice boy, and has been perfectly willing to aid in the city's defence, but for all his interest in Earth he is rather tight lipped about himself."
394True. Jules asked a whole lot of questions, but he never seemed to want to say anything about himself, even if he was pretty bad at not being obvious about shit like 'my species has a way better sense of smell than yours.'
395"That's exactly the sort of thing I'd love a report on," The King gestured back to call his guard from staring at the wall. "I have wanted to make sure our special visitor didn't feel too examined. He does seem rather terrified of the prospect of being sent to some lab. Must have seen some movie on TV. I've had some talks with the stations he has access to but there's only so much to be done about the internet."
396Ah, how many summer blockbusters were they going to miss this year? 
397The King waved off his concerns. "You worry too much, you know. Anyways, I want to treat our first extra-terrestrial visitor with soft gloves, but I also want to know something about this planet that's so interested in us. That's not unreasonable."  
398No, David has honestly been quite surprised that Jules had not already been dragged into some secret corner of the building, and had instead been given almost total freedom.
399"I've spent a good amount of time with the boy. I trust he means us no harm, but I do need to know more. It's obvious this form of his is not what he was born with. I want to know how his species got here, how they turned themselves so convincingly humanoid, and if anyone else may be coming along. I've made a nice little list for you." The King retrieved a notebook from his coat pocket, then tore the page in one swift flick of his hand.
400Just fucking great. Well, David'd do it. Of course he'd do it. He'd get started that very evening.
401"Great!" The King said as David studied his list before turning towards the door. "Sad to sad my usual methods aren't working. I'd hoped I'd be able to adapt with enough exposure but whatever he really is even I can’t read his mind."
402After The King was gone around the corner David leaned back in his chair and caught a glance of his partially opened drawer. The conversation had been so odd it hadn't been hard at all to not think about it.
403*
404A few hours later, texts to Jules sent, David waited in the main entrance lobby.
405A massive cavern of a place, the lobby had been designed by The King's late mother. Her passion had been gardening. Which was a bit difficult when the ground stayed frozen once you dug a metre down and the summer temperatures never reached the twenties.
406So she'd had a thing for making gardens indoors, and he position had meant she could pull it off.
407Temperate rainforest mixed with spare wooden furniture circled a massive fountain disguised as a waterfall. Once they'd tried to keep fish in it.  Or so legend said.
408David wiggled, trying to get comfortable on the curved wooden bench. He was probably a dick, sending Jules out in the shit weather when he could just go himself. 
409He couldn't just stay inside forever because of a stupid letter.
410Right?
411David looked at his phone, almost swiped through to LINE.
412That was when something by the fountains exploded and fucking robots started shooting at shit.
413*
414David woke up under what may have been a desk, maybe have been a tree, his arm bent in a way he was pretty sure it wasn't supposed to. Also the robots were still there.
415Shit. A quick struggle showed he wasn't getting out from the rubble. Even if he could reach the holster hidden under his coat he doubted he could take any of them out. His aim had always been shit. 
416His best bet was to play dead and hope whoever had sent these guys hadn't programmed them very well. Sometimes if you just stayed still enough they couldn't register—
417One turned to him. Damn. 
418Then it exploded into junk.
419Oh. Jules had arrived fifteen minutes late with starbucks.
420
421Fast, not as fast as the Pinks, but enough David had trouble following.
422
423Jules was there, a bot fell. Jules was there. A bot fell.
424
425One shot at him. Idiot. Jules could fucking dodge bullets. Could block them with, oh, yeah, the desk worked for that.
426
427Another robot down.
428
429All the awkwardness fell away when Jules fought. He didn't pause. He moved. He didn't fumble. He just acted.
430
431Fucking alien super soldier bullshit that was. If Jules's species did want to invade, Earth was fucked.
432
433"David!" 
434
435Oh, he was done. 
436
437Jules rushes towards him. Ah, he'd dumped his coat. His shirt was ripped. Fuck. 
438
439David was blushing. There was no way Jules didn't notice how flushed David was as he pulled the desk off David. 
440
441Damnit, he was already half to fainting already this was poor timing for inconvenient blood flow.
442
443But Jules was still in one of those deep gooves dug with training. There was no looks or confused words, at least until Jules saw David's arm.
444
445"Don't think it hit anything important. I'm barely bleeding, yeah?"
446
447Jules didn't answer, mouth a tight closed line. He'd looked up first aid or been taught, although David suspected such things went lightly different back home, Jules seemed to know blood is supposed to be on the inside of one's body. 
448
449"David, I think I can move you if not for your arm." Hands hovered over David's arm, jerking back when a finger brushed and caused David to wince. "Do you have spray?"
450
451"Spray?"
452
453"Spray, it—" He stuttered to a stop. Oh no, Jules was slipping back to his normal self already. "To keep the broken parts in place. Temporarily?"
454
455"No?" said David, staring at the ceiling as Jules moved closer. Wow they'd taken out a shtton of trees. Was that smoke? Was the lobby on fire?
456
457Ah, the sprinklers fizzed on.
458
459The King was going to be pissed. 
460
461The sprinkler water plastered Jules's hair to his face. Wow he was really close. On top of David, even. This was really not fair. Not fair at all.
462
463"Here. I'm sorry if this is painful." Then Jules lifted David's broken arm off the floor in order to duct tape a ruler to it and fuck yeah it was painful enough to distract from that.
464David proceeded to teach Jules many new and interesting words.
465
4660428 17:37 itisfrog
467JHQ on Fire. Avoid. I am awake now.
46804028 18:00  Weekly_Mu 
469Official statement regarding terrorist attack on Justice Head Quarters released states King not on site at time of attack. Full story at site.
470David's hair was very soft. Jules did not have much to compare to. This was the first time he'd been allowed to pat someone's head like this and he only had the opportunity because David was still unconscious.
471"He's not a cat," someone commented. 
472Jules could not place them. Male, Caucasian, somewhere firmly past the age of adulthood but not yet old enough to be considered elderly. They wore a wrecked and singed gray suit and sat on one of the stretchers, holding a large ice pack against their ribs.
473"I know he is not a cat." Jules had not yet had a chance to see a live cat. No one in the building owned pets, and while The Frog had two at her off-site apartment and was willing to share pictures via phone text, she would not allow Jules to visit her home.
474He had seen one dog while fetching coffee for Jules. Although he was not certain.  The creature had been nearly as bundled up as its owner.
475"Then don't treat him like your damn pet," spat the man. "I know you, what you are."
476"I see." A non-literal, common confirmation generally considered neutral unless certain tones were used. 
477Jules did suspect his nature was what was called an 'open secret' inside the building. The king of the land had assured Jules that his status would not be revealed to the greater public or the press, but while Humans did not share information quite as easily as Jules's own species, they certainly managed wide breadth. Paradoxically, especially when that information had been labelled 'do not re-distribute.'
478The man glared. It was an easy expression to read. Jules appreciated its unsubtly.
479Jules kept petting. From watching television he knew this was a perfectly socially acceptable gesture when one was concerned for an injured companion, especially if David remained unconscious for it.
480There was likely no further response to the man that would not provoke greater hostility, thus Jules chose silence. They were in the treatment ward of the JHQ, surrounded by medical professionals, other victims of the day's attack, and visitors. If the man attempted a physical altercation it would not end well for him. Unless he was suffering from a head injury he would be wise to do more than glare.
481So Jules pretended to ignore him, and looked down at David instead. Dark red splotches of bruising scattered across every exposed area of skin. The damaged arm had been set and given an exo-skeleton-like hard bandage. Research on Jules's phone had said it could take over a month and a half to heal enough for the casing to be removed.
482It would impede David's work, and most day to day activities. It had clearly hurt.
483If Jules had been faster to return, perhaps it would not have happened.
484"Hey!" The man said louder this time. "Don't just ignore me you--!"
485
486"Wha?" David stirred under Jules' hand and now it was Jules' turn to glare.
487
488"It is nothing, David. You can sleep still," Jules said.
489
490For a small, barely measurable moment of time, David pressed the side of his face harder into Jules' touch. Then his own hands came up, batting Jules away in what Jules hoped was mostly confusion. "What's going on? Where is--?"
491
492David's eyes only partially open, glancing around the room. "Oh, I didn't get killed then. Okay." Then he flopped back down onto the stretcher.
493
494The stranger scoffed.
495
496Jules's dislike proportionally increased.
497
498"You broke your arm," Jules explained. "I was told you may go to your apartment one you are able to walk, although you will need to report for a check--"
499
500"I can walk. I want to go home."
501
502"You do not seem—"
503
504"Then fuckin carry me, Jules. I want to go home." A pause. David scrunched up his face as if the light of the room caused him pain. "Please."
505
506Jules did not end up carrying David, technically. He simply held most of David's weight. It was not that David's legs were injured, it was the cloudiness of the painkillers that hindered him. Jules did not know exactly what types of chemicals they had used but the side-effects seemed severe.
507
508The trip to David's apartment was uneventful but for a few stumbles and odd words on the elevator when David leaned all his weight against Jules' side, his head against the back of David's neck.
509
510"You just smell like smoke," he said. 
511
512Jules was unable to find any particular meaning to the statement. "Yes. There was a fire. It is out now."
513
514"I don't like it."
515
516He did not elaborate further.
517
518David's pass card was in his cat pocket, attached by a chain. A sensible precaution against loss.
519
520The layout of furniture was similar to Jules' own room. A bed. A table. A small fridge. A closet. 
521
522David was almost entirely out from the drugs again, and neither helped nor hindered Jules in removing his shoes. But with David unconscious, Jules was unsure on how to next proceed.
523
524As much as Jules suspected David would not like his partially destroyed and bloodied clothes to sully his bed clothing, he also suspected David would be even less happy to know Jules removed his clothes and bathed him while unconscious. The human nudity taboo had been one of the easier ones to osmose.
525
526So what to do?
527
528Jules scanned the small room. A large towel sat in a pile on the floor near the door to what Jules presumed to be the bathroom.
529
530Suitably wrapped, Jules tucked Jules under the covers. It was not a perfect solution but would have to suffice.
531
532He checked David's arm cast. He checked David's breathing. 
533
534He sat on the floor beside the bed.
535
536He noticed one major difference from his own room. There was no television.
537
538But for David's breathing, it was quiet.
539
540First, as dinner had been interrupted, Jules investigated the small fridge that held up a pile of folders. It confirmed previous suspicions that David consumed food primarily off-premises.
541
542Consuming leftovers and investigation of the apartment's contents took less than an hour. David had not stirred. It was likely he would be asleep until the next morning, even without the pain killers in his system. The time was now past four in the morning.
543
544It was when Jules went to the bathroom to drink water that he remembered one of the few things David had said that night. Jules sniffed his arm. His clothing did smell strongly of smoke, among other things unpleasant. The shower was right beside the sink.
545
546It was proper manners to not smell unpleasant in David's home. However he could not leave David alone when the man was in such a condition.
547
548The solution to this problem was simple.
549
550David's shower functioned the same as Jules's. The soap was a different brand. Larger, blocky, a translucent purple and a scent Jules recognised. If he used it to smell more similar to David would that be too forward on Earth? He used it anyways, it was easier to stay in old habits than to worry about new rules he did not yet fully understand even when he suspected the local custom differed from his own.
551
552Clothes were borrowed from the closet. Fit was adequate. Smell also lingered here, this time of detergents. 
553
554Yet Jules could still smell smoke.
555
556Then he spotted it, a small glass and metal object on the floor of the closet. The liquid inside sloshed against the blue glass walls. Jules popped the cap off. The scent was overwhelming.
557
558Ah, this was the 'perfume' David had previously mentioned. Its stench was almost too much for Jules' nose, so bitter yet similar to the trees that grew indoors in the building. It would certainly overcome any lingering smell of smoke.
559
560Jules sprayed himself once. That was enough.
561
562He settled on the floor beside David's bed and began to browse his phone, and wait.
563*
564Shit dreams. Really shit dreams. Filled with smoke and pine and the smell of burning flesh.
565The stumble into wakefulness may have involved some shouting.
566
567"Hey, it's okay." Large warm hands, gentle but firm on his shoulders, settled David back down into the bed. "It's alright now."
568
569David let himself be pulled closer, sunk into the embrace, face right flat against rough shirt, nose against a button. Just enough pressure to be comforting, not enough to confine. Warm. Yeah, it was fine. "Sorry."
570
571"Nah." The words rumbled from above his head. Soft.  Who'd ever believe it, this hard-ass soft around him. He'd knife anyone that knew and honestly? That made it better. "Nothing to be sorry about, Davey."
572
573Then David was staring at the popcorn spackled ceiling of his JHQ apartment.
574
575His arm was heavy. Oh. Right. Cast. Broken arm. Fuck.
576
577David took a nice long breath because it was better than screaming.
578
579Silence, darkness and then—
580
581A shuffling noise, flickering light of a phone-screen cycling pages.
582
583Great, he couldn't even feel shit in peace. "Good morning."
584
585"David!" Oh, it was Jules. That kinda wasn't as bad. Somehow. At least it made more sense than anyone else hanging around watching him sleep. "Are you thirsty?"
586
587Probably. Yes. Sure. Fuck it just keep staring at the ceiling. Maybe it had answers. "I think?"
588
589The sound of movement, a few cracks of the floor tiles as Jules went in and out of the washroom.
590
591David forced himself up, just enough to drink. That was about all he could manage.
592
593Jules hovered over the edge of the bed to take back the glass. "Do you need food as well?"
594
595David's stomach rebelled at the very suggestion. "No, uh, is my phone around?"
596
597Hell, he'd been knocked out, right? Did he still have his wallet? His gun? Not great to lose either in a lobby on fire.
598
599Oh, right, the lobby had been on fire. Robots.
600
601He gave himself a quick pat down, made interesting by the fact he was a towel taco. Okay, weird.
602
603At least all his stuff was still on him.
604
605"Do you wish to shower?"
606
607Oh Hell no. "I am so not up or that right now. Just gonna pass out again thanks."
608
609Jules gave him a look. David was certain it was a judgmental look. "It would be best to at least change out of your damaged clothing so as to not further soil the bed."
610
611Ugh, fine. Jules raised his arms. "Carry me to the washroom. Please."
612
613Jules actually did. Goddamnit, why was he so fucking strong? David was going to blame the blushing on the painkillers. His head was woozy as fuck. Yeah, that was it. Worse than any alcohol that stuff. Couldn't even keep his head up. That's why it lolled against Jules' neck. For support.
614
615Jules deposited him on the rim of the bathtub. When David started to topple, one hand came back to keep him upright as he emptied his pockets. Wallet. Keys. Gun. 
616
617Jules cocked his head to one side at that one. What, did he think Jules didn't go to work armed? Today—or had it been yesterday now?—wasn't the first time JHQ had been attacked. It wouldn't be that last.
618
619Even if it were, well Jules didn't go anywhere unarmed if he had a choice on the matter. He hadn't since his teens, since he'd stolen his first gun from the neighbour's truck.
620
621David let it drop into the sink with a clunk.
622
623Jules startled.
624
625Eh, okay, maybe he was a little lax on gun safety. Bad habits. Hard to kick. At least he wasn't carrying the damn thing down the back of his pants like when he'd been an edgy teen, okay?
626
627"Ugh." Was that groan from trying to take off his suit coat one handed or from remembering his dumbass past? Even David didn't know.
628
629Oh no. The cast. Some bastard had cut off his sleeve to put on the damn cast.
630
631"My suit…" Those things were not cheap.
632
633What a great day. If only that desk had just squashed him.
634No matter how much David said he was fine, Jules wouldn't leave, and David just didn't have it in him to kick the guy out. Jules'd forced David to eat a cookie before he could down more painkillers. Now the buzz of sedatives kicking in on a mostly empty stomach was taking over and arguing with Jules to leave was no longer something David could keep up with.
635"I don't even have a TV and I'm probably just going to pass out again." Probably. Hopefully. 
636"I will not be bored." Jules sat in the floor, back against the mattress of David's bed. There wasn't even a rug but the guy claimed it was fine. "I have been watching animal videos. Earth has an amazing amount of biological diversity."
637Huh. Okay.
638David watched the shadows and light flicker on the ceiling until that stopped amusing him. His throat was dry but he didn’t want to ask for more nursing than he;d already had. Somewhere, deep far down he recalled you were supposed to look after guests, not have them look after you. Right?
639But damn he was bored. Bored and useless and—
640Oh, right. There was something he could work on.
641"Hey." David let one arm drop, touch light against Jules' shoulder. "Tell me about your planet."
642Jules said nothing, but the flickering shuffling of the screenlight ceased. A glance down showed the screen settled on a selection of bug feeding videos. Gross.
643Fuck it. David was drugged out of his mind, on orders to investigate the space alien currently playing his nurse, and really, he was curious.
644"You have a mission to investigate Earth, specifically humans, but you won't tell anyone about your own planet. And Jules, no matter how much you try and demure that you lot are just like us you're a shit liar." He poked the side of Jules' arm.  "Sometimes I think you might be a robot."
645"I am not a robot," Jules said with that flat but unconcerned tone he used that almost made it sound like he wasn't really paying attention to you anymore.
646"There's nothing wrong with being a robot."
647"I am not a robot," Jules repeated, slower. 
648"I don't care what you are, my point is no one knows anything about you, while you've been allowed to run around like the city is a petting zoo." Ok maybe that was a bit harsh. David could blame the drugs for revealing his true asshole self.
649Silence. Long enough to make it awkward. To make David totally feel like a heel for asking.
650Ugh. "I mean—"
651"It wasn't supposed to happen like this." The words came halting. "No one was supposed to know we were here, thus all my orders are to avoid telling Humans anything."
652David knew that, he'd read the interview transcripts when David had arrived. Thirty one others were supposed to have landed near David, made contact, remained hidden. 
653"I am not supposed to make decisions as large as letting Humanity know my planet exists."
654"Hey." David poked Jules' arm again, but a bit gentler this time. "It's good to be wary, most people can barely handle superpowers, they'd freak out at aliens, but JHQ is okay. And I've never been a snitch in my life. You can tell me shit and no one else will ever hear it, alright?"
655It was true. David had many failings. Being unable to keep secrets was not one of them. Death hadn't changed that. Prison hadn't changed that. An alien saying he was actually a robot or something wouldn't either.
656David could honestly with no qualifications state that he would repeat anything Jules told him out loud.
657He could not, of course, control what The King might pick up from his mind.
658More silence.
659"Hey, how about something safe? What do you even call your planet?" Jules had given a technical designation, a series of letters and numbers David hadn't understood but apparently could be used to find the thing if given to astronomers. If he could tell people where the dang thing was, he could give up it's name, right?
660"I have not been able to decide how to pronounce it properly," Jules eventually said. "It feels disrespectful to give an improper name."
661Discussion and suggesting to cll it jules home
662
663"So, If someone is injured at your home, you watch them sleep all night like this?"
664
665"Yes, this is normal. At home…" The sound trailed off again and David thought he'd have to try something else. "At home one is rarely alone. All sleeping is communal. There are no separate rooms for individuals, and almost all activities and decisions are conducted in pairs at the minimum."
666
667"What, everything?" That sounded kind of like Hell to David. 
668
669"Yes," said Jules. To be left alone for an extended period of time is unheard of unless punishment for a serious crime. In such cases the death penalty is seen as kinder."
670
671Being alone worse than death? "No wonder you were upset when you saw your apartment."
672
673"I did wonder if I was being imprisoned, but I was able to open the door after you left," replied Jules, once more shuffling phone videos. "I explored the floor yet was unable to find anyone else. However, the television has been useful as a distraction. I do not understand why you do not have one."
674
675"Wait, is this why you're so—" Don't say 'clingy.' Don't say--
676
677"I was made to be more independent as the size of the mission cohort would be so small, but we were supposed to use, I think it is called 'the buddy system'?" Jules turned his head to face David's good arm, his nose jut brushing it. Was he sniffing it? He was sniffing it. "Similar to how I was originally not allowed to leave the Justice Headquarters un-accompanied, but with a different motive."
678
679Depressing. Really fucking depressing. But fuck did a lot of Jules's weirdness suddenly make sense. 
680
681"Hey. Come up on the bed," said David.
682
683Jules's head tilted in that way that made it seem as if he was waiting for something else after the words. Fuck, he probably was.
684
685"It's cold on the floor, get up here."
686
687Jules didn't need to be told a third time. 
688
689Now this was almost certainly a horrible idea and David blamed the meds. Asking a guy to get in bed ith him was asking for true. But it was easier to wrangle the technicalities of moving a dead arm out of the way for a another body to have room than to deal with Jules just admitting he'd never been alone before being stuck as the only alien on Earth. 
690
691Jules settled in a spot against the wall, close enough he almost touched David. Close enough that for once David could even smell him he—
692
693That wasn't right.
694
695Greeny, herby, weirdly fruity—
696
697What. The fuck.
698
699"David?" Jules asked. "Are you all right? You are behaving strangely." He might have asked about the meds after that. 
700
701David didn't hear.
702"Why-?" The word was strangled off by the involuntary closing of his own throat. His lung scrunched into themselves, refusing to take in anymore air. That didn't make sense. Why did he? What he? How--?
703
704"David?"
705
706Fuck.
707
708"David, you have to breathe."
709
710Something was heavy. Something was too heavy.
711
712"David, please breathe."
713
714It was him, Jules. Why the fuck did he smell like that? Why was he grabbing David? That wasn't right. That wasn't fair!
715
716"I'm sorry. I wanted to—"
717
718Something something shower smoke something. Fuck that. Fuck this. This was stupid. David was being stupid. This wasn't anything to be upset about. Why was he upset? That was dumb. He shouldn't-- He should just stop being upset--
719
720Jules's arms circled him, then he hugged, tight. 
721
722Somehow, David had no idea why, it helped. It helped enough David's mind managed to pause its reeling in circles of horror to form a question: "What the fuck are you doing?"
723
724One of Jules' hands found David's, twining their fingers. The other braced David's cast against his own chest. "This is standard practice, to surround someone upset with warmth. From what I have seen it is also an accepted technique here."
725
726That was one way to explain a goddamn hug. "Yeah, pretty much." He wasn't freaked out now. He was just tired. Okay, his hands were shaking but mostly he was tired. What the fuck was he gonna say? 'Yeah I'm having a goddamn panic attack because you found my ex's cologne'? Which by the way, David had no damn reason to own and had bought in a moment of weakness one boxing day sale five years after the fucker died? 
727
728Yeah, there was a batch of concepts David didn't want to teach to Jules tonight. 
729
730Or any night. Ever.
731
732Jules meanwhile, still had a death-tight squeeze going on. "Your breathing is still—"
733"Jules, just—" Don't say shut up. Don't—"Give me a moment."
734
735It was warm. It was heavy. David scrunched tighter, pressing his face into Jules' chest until finally the meds took him out.
736
737*
738
739Jules 1:36:46 AM
740 Thank you for the cat picture.
741Jules 9:02:48 AM
742I would like to ask your advice.
743Frog 10:23:32 AM
744Ok
745Jules 10:42:02 AM
746First I must ask how the situation with the lobby has been progressing. Although I have been receiving updates from various people, more perspective is always useful. I have been told we are to use the conference room C and exit 2-B until sufficient repairs have been made. Also, Little Pink said that once they kept fish in the fountains. Do you think those in charge of the renovations could be persuaded to do so again? I would like to see a salmon someday. However, my main questions concern David. As I informed you last night, he was among the injured in the attack. His cast seems to have held up overnight but he has a large amount of bruising left. (Bruising lasts a long time?) Also it is possible he had an adverse reaction to his painkillers among other incidents. I have accidently upset him by smelling incorrectly. (I apologise but I cannot give further details at this point.) Although I had thought we had made a great amount of progress in our relationship, as of those morning David seems very displeased with me and made me leave his room almost immediately upon waking. Although I soon returned to his apartment with coffee and breakfast (I went to the deli you had mentioned several days previously and indeed the coffee is much better than that created by the percolator by the archives, and they made a very cute design on the latte however they said the clementine-cranberry scones will be discontinued after Friday) he was no longer there. Do you think he had a medical appointment? They probably need to continue to check his injuries. They were quite busy last night. (I apologise for not earlier inquiring whether anyone else to us has been seriously harmed but it appeared that David was one of the most seriously injured.) To return to my main point, I have never stayed overnight in another's home before this. Are David's actions normal? I do not think so but I want to check. Do you think he is angry at me? Do you know why he m
747Jules 10:42:04 AM 
748ight be angry at me?
749Sorry that did not fit. Also Pink Falcon has told me that I 'came on too strong' and 'should not sleep with someone on painkillers on the first date.' I asked her to clarify as first of all this would not be classified as a 'date' and if any of our interactions could be called 'dates,' there would have been many already as David and I have eaten food together in a public environment multiple times but then she sent me pictures of people laughing. I do not appreciate that.
750Frog 10:48:59 AM
751Ok
752*
753Two days after one of the most embarrassing nights of his life, David was cornered.
754
755"I can't believe you," Bonnie Kirke, currently out of her Pink Falcon uniform and wearing something expensive from her latest collection, but perhaps even more dangerous with a latte in one hand and the other waving in David's face. "Slept with spaceboy then broke his heart."
756
757"I did not—" He paused. Goddamn her coffee looked better than his. "No, whatever you think, no. Also, I have work."
758
759Not even a lie. This was an important year for the King's rule, thirty years on the throne, and the celebrations were just about to start. Everyone was busy. And that meant everyone needed forms and shit. Not to mention, they'd just lost the use of the lobby for who knew how long so an entire chunk of staff had to be moved and kept running with most of their supplies buried under trees and rubble. So much had to be re-ordered. There were so many repairs to get scheduled. Which also meant dipping into the emergency fund. Which meant—
760
761Oh god her nails were really long and really close to his face.
762
763"Look, you," she pointed one incredibly long bedazzled acrylic at his nose. "If you don't like the kid, just tell him off already. Dump his ass. Be blunt. But get it over with. He's blowing up my phone and I feel sorry for his dumb ass."
764
765"This isn't—"
766
767"And another thing!" The hand retracted only to shove a piece of paper even closer into his personal space. "Here's the paperwork to sell my merch at the event. You want anything else, call my lawyer, not me."
768
769Then David was left with shitty coffee, more forms and an ever rising sense of guilt.
770
771He hadn't been answering Jules' text. Or his calls. He might have slept under his desk one night, just in case.
772
773He was a fucking coward.
774
775David dodged a few more attempted filings until he was safely behind the closed and shuttered door of his office. A stack of files made a good enough place to face-plant.
776
777He didn't want to tell Jules to fuck off. That was the whole problem. But—
778
779The envelope with the ring still sat there, burning a hole in his drawer. David went one drawer higher and grabbed the cheapass bottle of vodka he'd bought months ago when the weather had started to turn cold.
780
781Yeah, it was going to be another great day.
782
783He poured some in the coffee. Took a gulp. It was, as always, terrible. 
784
785His cell was within reach of his good arm. Today was a day to make bad choices. He found his chat with Jules. Read an ever shortening series of texts asking what was wrong and if David was okay.
786
787He was so not okay.  Stupid arm. He took out his bottle of pain pills. Wrote a message to Jules. Drank some coffee. Deleted the message to Jules. Downed a few pills with his next chug of coffee. Wrote a new message. Sent the message. Remembered his coffee was spiked with hobo booze.
788
789Got rather dizzy.
790
791Yeah, today was a day of bad choices, he thought as he again dropped his head onto his pile of files. This time it stayed there.
792
793*
794David had one formal suit, purchased long ago under duress, and it didn't fit. He only brought it out for mandatory events like this, a reception/party to formally kick off the year's pearl anniversary marathon. Every one important that the King could manage to convince to come this close to the arctic circle in march was here, and to fill in the gaps were his employees. 
795It was framed as a reward for good work. It was Hell with the promise of free alcohol only barely making it tolerable.
796David leaned against a pillar in the huge-ass ballroom that the JHQ kept for just these sorts of occasions, clutching a flute of fancy champagne. He'd only taken a pill a few hours ago. He'd be fine. Probably. If not the bathrooms were just on the other side of the fountain. To his left he had a clear shot at the desserts table. To the right, the bathrooms. Combined with the potted plants giving him cover it was a good spot.
797The ballroom was one of the oldest parts of the Justice Headquarters complex, must of the later buildings being built around it. It had been a wannabe castle once, then a series of disastrous renovations had destroyed most of the original charm. Or so David had been told. Many times.
798People wandered about in cliques and pairs. Nearby at the closest of the open bars, the Crown Prince had an audience of admirers as he showed off his amazing powers. Woo he could make things float. Amazing.
799One of the onlookers, unfortunately, was Jules, who might have been the only one that looked genuinely interested.
800The pocket on his ass, David' phone buzzed.
801DA KING: I believe I told you to keep our spacefairing friend away from my son.
802Fuck.
803Okay, fine. David could play the same game. He opened his chat history with Jules. Apparently before passing out the previous night, David had sent a video of a cat eating a banana.
804Jules: I do not understand are cats not carnivorous? However, I am glad you have responded. Does this mean we are friends again? 
805Jules: Pink Falcon say you are threatening me.
806Jules: I do not understand.
807Jules: Please respond.
808Upon awakening David had decided to just, not reply to that. Whatever that had been. But, it seemed, he was going to get in shit with the Boss if he didn't. Besides, it wasn't like Jules getting on with Prince Dumbass was a good thing.
809Prince Martis Caelestis the 3rd had inherited everything from his mother but her brain. As far as David knew the Queen had been an okay person, generally not disliked, if a bit flighty. She'd been from far away, some small time European royalty offshoot, just the sort the King's forefathers had loved to intermarry with. She'd hated the cold and the Prince had half grown up far away from his future playland. Not always a bad thing, but it wouldn't have mattered where he'd gone, he was a natural born dumbass.
810But he had power and a future that promised more power, so he always had a crowd. Just like now except—
811Jules had his phone out, like always, but the Prince was done with his air show. The Prince had his hand on Jules' waist. No, he was slipping it under Jules' suit coat.
812David emptied his glass. Set it on the window sill. 
813He texted Jules the strangest cat picture he could find.
814Immediately:
815Jules: I am sorry. I do not understand.
816David: So get your ass over her so I can explain it.
817Okay, maybe a few hours wasn't enough space to start drinking the bubbly. It still worked. Jules peeled himself away from the handsy heir and made a bee-line for David's hiding spot. David didn't even have to wave. He did anyways, just to keep it casual.
818As Jules neared David slid sideways around the pillar, angling them away from the Prince's glares and more into the potted ferns. Jules' steps faltered, but he followed.
819"Firstly, I didn't mean anything by mention your ass." It was important to get that one out of the way quickly. Jules' ass existed. It was adequate. There was no deeper meaning.
820"Oh," said Jules. His suit fit. It also looked like it came from the same place the King shopped. Then again the Prince shopped there too. Which had taken him? "I am familiar with that expression. I have heard it quite often while working."
821Good. "Good." Good.
822Jules stared at him. This was normal. He did not say anything. This was not.
823Then Jules leaned forward, and sniffed him. He frowned, before glancing to the empty glass on the ledge. "You are intoxicated."
824
825"Maybe a little," replied David, suddenly somehow even more uncomfortable. He'd gotten Jules away from the Prince. Now what? If he stopped talking, Jules would just go back. If he kept talking… well that seemed even more dangerous. At least the pillar stayed solid against his back. "Open bar. If you want to experiment, tonight's the night."
826
827Jules didn't have any drink in his hand, just his phone. Could he even drink alcohol? When they had gone out he'd always ordered obscenely sugary soda or coffee. Maybe they could get a pina colada.
828
829"That is true, but I have been warned away from alcohol." Jules glanced down at his phone, tap tapping away. Always tapping. "By several people."
830
831"Well—"
832
833"I have been warned away from you as well."
834
835Well.
836
837Jules leaned in again, his nose almost touching David's. They were close enough that if one of them moved just a little—
838
839Jules sniffed. "You are very intoxicated. When was the last time you consumed pain medication for your arm?"
840
841David jerked his head back, unfortunately right into the pillar, but he tried to ignore it. "That, is not your business."
842
843"Why isn't it?" asked Jules. "Is it the same reason you have begun avoiding me? Ifyou tell me what I have done wrong, I will correct my behaviour."
844
845"I—" David knew deep in an ignored part of his mind, he probably owed Jules an examination on that one. David had made a fool of himself, then flaked out, then been a giant chicken. This was on him. 
846
847But before David could piece together some combination of words that would both explain and not make himself seem like more of a dick, Jules took a step back. "The Prince of Mu has made it clear he wishes to have sexual relations with me." 
848
849Well damn there went and coherent sentences David had on the production line. "What."
850
851"He said so quite bluntly after I misunderstood his first insinuations." Jules nodded as he talked, as if letting David in on some secret.
852
853"He what?" 
854
855Jules tilted his head to one side. "However, I feel I must decline as the majority of Human cultures place a high value on monogamy, and your Prince is currently wed."
856
857Right. The Princess, currently, and for most of the year, in Dubai. David had barely ever seen her, and certainly never talked to her. Rumour was she might be pregnant again. If so she would be back in a few months, all heirs had to be born in their future kingdom.
858
859"Jealousy seems to be a powerful emotion in Humans. I admit I have a difficult time understanding it, as such a thing does not exist in my own culture," continued Jules. "If I were to have sexual relations with her husband, the Princess' jealously would be not only socially  warranted, but likely to cause me severe harm as although she does not hold as high a status as her husband she is of far higher status than I. "
860
861"Well—" As far as David knew she'd never managed to ruined the lives of her husband's previous affairs, but really, no reason to tell Jules that, yes?
862
863Jules wasn't even feeling up his phone anymore, what was going on here. "I theorize this intense emotion is tied to Human's obsession with possession. Each individual believes they deserve total control over things that they have deemed 'theirs' be it an inanimate object like a coffee cup, an abstract like wealth, or most interestingly, other sentient creatures. Once something is thought of as owned, the owner will have a desire to keep it to themselves. This desire seems to be strengthened if others attempt to take the claimed subject away."
864
865"Yes, we're selfish." Ah, back to familiar territory of Jules insulting the entire Human race. It was almost like everything was back to normal except Jules put his hand against the pillar, inches from David's face.
866
867"Does this bother you?"
868
869"That humans suck?"
870
871"That the Prince wants to commit adultery with me."
872
873David glanced over Jules' shoulder. Managed a hopefully casual shrug. At least it seemed Jules had already decided not to. If the King was upset at the Prince being friends, well. "It's not my business who the Prince sleeps with, but you're right, never good to be a homewrecker. You're navigating those social conventions good there."
874
875Jules didn't answer, but continued to stare.
876*
877Jules continued to stare at David. What had he done wrong? Everything had seemingly gone well, but now nothing was working. Did David actually not like him? Had he never liked him, or had he simply changed his mind? Was that normal and Jules should have expected it? Or, did David actually like him but have some reason to act as if he didn't? If so, what was it? Could it be dealt with? Or, a depressing possibility, was Pink Falcon correct that David was simply not work the effort?
878Jules had invested a considerable amount of time, energy and effort—
879David glanced to Jules' side just as Jules felt the weight of a hand landing on his right shoulder. The action should not have startled him. He was not paying enough attention. This was not acceptable.
880He could feel himself frown, and the action was not on purpose. This was also not acceptable.
881Everything was going so poorly. If only he at least understood why.
882But, that was not Little Pink's fault. So Jules attempted to correct his facial expression before turning towards him. "Hello."
883"Hi." Little Pink smiled, which it seemed to take him effort as well, more so when he looked at David, the side of his mouth dipping back down slightly for under a second. "You two losers want to tell my sister she's hot? She spent four hours on her hair."
884Although Jules was shaky on Human hair practices, his own thankfully being short enough he could so far maintain it  with simple washing, Pink Falcon was looking very aesthetically pleasing as far as Jules could discern. Although he had learned enough to never ask directly, it did indeed look as if she had spent a considerable amount of time and effort.
885She too, appeared to need effort to smile at David. The muscles under her eyes only contacted when she returned her gaze to her sibling. 
886"Brought me some fans, did you?" She handed her glass to Falcon X then twirled. "Alright, take it all in. Goes on sale next month."
887She also took advantage of the ballroom's interior heating to wear a dress so short Jules would have classified it as a shirt if not otherwise informed. The sides were held together with golden chins, and pink crystals decorated the edges creating fascinating reflections on the marbleized ballroom floor. The fabric, which seemed to be a synthetic blend, was her standard colour pink, and based upon her words part of her company's designer line. Although Pink Falcon's main occupation was her contract with the Mu JHQ, much of her considerable wealth was from her fashion and merchandise lines. 
888Jules had investigated the website the majority of her wares for sale, but they were not only majorly aimed at women, but according to Frog, far too expensive. 
889Falcon X and Little Pink's outfits were well matched to their leader. In this culture, fashion choices appeared to be much more limiting for men. All in the ballroom wore similar suits, their options for the individual expression Humans so valued limited to subtleties of cuts, colours, and accessories.
890It was possible that Falcon X and Little Pink could also be classified as accessories belonging to Pink Falcon. The Pink Gang was a unit, and Pink Falcon was undeniably at the top of that unit. Such hierarchy appeared to be integral to Human social systems, although their configuration seemed to be rare. More commonly a male would hold the highest tier, while any women would be placed below. Why this was, Jules had not been able to discover.
891Little Pink clapped.
892"You look better than everyone else here," said David.
893"Yes," said Jules, "You look very good."
894She shrugged as Falcon X returned her glass. "I'll take it."
895Pink Falcon nodded towards David's arm cast and the lightly patterned sling that kept it close to his torso. The colour matched his tie. The pattern did not. "Nice cast. Want an autograph?"
896David shrugged. "Sure. Got a pen?"
897Falcon X produced a pink sharpie from a pocket of his suit then handed it to Pink Falcon. She proceeded to write her title on David's out-held cast.
898"Should the others sign too or am I special?" asked Pink Falcon.
899David's smile was also fake, although Jules had preferred to not notice it. Jules was quickly learning that the key trading happiness on another's expression was the eye area. The mouth only lied. "I have no idea what the correct answer to that." 
900His cast was signed anyways. As soon as the third name was written Jules made certain to hold out his hand.
901Falcon X glanced to Pink Falcon, then David, then back.
902Surely if everyone else was marking their names on David's broken arm, Jules could as well?
903"What is the purpose of this?" he asked, as Falcon X handed him the writing tool that stank of sharp volatile elements. He capped it while he remembered how to form his hand properly.
904"Tradition or something," Pink Falcon said with a shrug. "Shit, they just brought out dessert. Space-boy, keep the sharpie, I'm getting in there before the good shit's gone."
905A very good plan of action, but Jules found getting the cap off of the marker difficult to manage while also keeping his hold proper.
906"Here." David's unbound hand came up to Jules', adjusting his fingers properly, just as he had on their first meeting. "I'll try and hold the arm steady but don't worry too much, everything's going to be covered by my sling you know."
907"That is true." Still, Jules attempted to have better penmanship on his second try. Once again he could feel himself frowning without his conscious instruction.
908"Maybe it's for luck or something," David said after Jules had the marker safely caped. "Or to show you know people and aren't such a loser no one wants to temporarily graffiti your limb. It's not like, marking ownership or anything like that, if you're wondering."
909"I had not thought it to be."
910David made a humming noise, then nodded towards the table the others had left for. "Go ahead and grab desert, don't mind me. I'm not battling the crowd."
911"Could I bring you something?"
912And so Jules set out on a mission to obtain two plates of 'whatever looks ok I guess.'
913The mass of bodies at the table refused to organize into a line or any sort of orderly assembly. Although Jules was used to larger groups that this at feeding times, Human's capacity for chaos was intimidating. The table was full of various foods, surely there was enough for all, and yet all acted as if the situation was the opposite.
914He targeted a dessert near the edge of the table. It was a rounded lump of baked mass, likely chocolate flavoured, with a glossy lighter brown coating, while a dark red syrup oozed from the cuts that divided the cake into mostly equal pieces. The smell was of intensely caramelized sugar and fruit. There were many portions remaining.
915He duly returned with two plates and the associated cutlery and a napkin for each.
916David was able to hold the plate in his injured hand, and while he poked at the cake portion Jules began to eat. The flavour was strong, much stronger and sharper than anticipated, but sugar-filled, and good. He quickly consumed more.
917"Hey, wait…" David was still in the process of investigating his food, poking it with his plastic fork. 
918Odd, surely the King would not give his subjects anything which could harm them. Although, he felt a strange warm fuzz beginning in his chest.
919"Uh, Jules, wait."
920Jules looked up from his meal, mid chew. He swallowed, as talking while eating was both impolite and potentially wasteful. His stomach fizzed. Perhaps he needed to slow down. "Yes?"
921"I'm pretty sure this cake is soaked in sherry, Jules."
922Luckily, David was able to escort him to the washroom before Jules began to involuntarily regurgitate.
923*
924Jules greatly disliked the acid stinging of his vomit. The Human body, he concluded, was terrible. So many species regurgitated food in a voluntary and still-edible manner. His own had once been one. The practice was now seldom used except in case of emergency, but it was possible, and not unpleasant. 
925Yet Humans--
926For Humans it was like this. A violent expunging of harmful material that offended every sense Jules could manage in his hobbled state.
927"I hate his," he concluded.
928"Reasonable," said David, reaching to press a water bottle against Jules' face. He kneeled on the dirty floor as if it were no contamination to worry about. "If you think you're done drink this."
929Jules was not done.
930His head ached, his sinuses burned, this throat burned, his mouth tasted rank and the tiled floor was not only dirty but hard and cold on his knees. Still, his single stomach burbled.
931"I really hate this."
932David put his un-harmed arm under Jules and pulled him away from the bowl. "Okay look, let's just, get you over to the nurses' office."
933David attempted to make them stand together. Jules remained loose. This feeling was almost not so marred by his sickness to be pleasant. 
934"Or I could call them to get you." Sadly David did not seem to find it so pleasant, grumbling something indecipherable as he struggled to get a better grip with one hindered arm and while holding a water bottle. Jules could not see but he suspected the man was frowning. 
935"No." Jules drew the sound out. "Do not please. I am not dying. We may stay here."
936David flopped them both against the blue stall wall, releasing Jules, which was disappointing. "You don't sound very convincing."
937Drawing out noises was oddly satisfying. "Nooo." 
938"Seriously, up you're freaking me out here." David it seemed, could lift Jules to his feet if he truly wanted to, even with a broken arm. While normally that would have been a positive surprise, in this context Jules was forced to resist.
939"No. I am fine," he repeated. Proving this sadly necessitated releasing himself from David's hold. He only needed to stabilize himself with a hand on the stall wall for a moment. "I am reasonably certain all the contents of my stomach have been expelled."
940David again grabbed him, an again shoved the bottle on Jules' face. "Great, drink this on the way."
941Jules took the bottle. Contemplated it as they neared the door. The label extolled the virtues of filtered arctic glacier water from northern Mu mountains. "No, I am fine. I do not need medical attention."
942"You puked for five minutes after have half a slice of boozy cake. That's not normal and you're a fucking space alien. You could be poisoned or something." 
943"I do not need it." He took a drink from the water bottle. It tasted like normal water, but the tinge of his sickness lingered in his mouth. He would need to clean as soon as possible. For now he let David lead him out the door.  "Please."
944David led them behind a convenient grouping of potted ferns, effetely blocking them from the sight line to the main ballroom as they headed for the exit. 
945"Jules…" The tone and speed David used to say Jules' name indicated displeasure, but combined with the tight grip on Jules' arm and the context, it was not unpleasant to hear. David was upset with him because he was concerned for his well-being. After days of being ignored, such concern was wonderful. Still, it would not do to worry Jules. 
946"I am fine." He would be fine. More fine than if he allowed himself to be subjected to medical examination for no purpose. The examination upon his capture had been cursory, non-invasive, but if the medical professionals were given an excuse, he had worry they would use it to delve too far for him to cover. "Please just take me to my apartment. I promise I am fine now. I do not want to be examined by the doctors."
947David did not answer for a moment, and Jules attempted to prepare more arguments, but then David sighed deeply, then tried again to take Jules' weight. "Fine. Nearest door'll be to our right. Let's try to avoid getting stopped. But if you're going to toss up again give me warning, I know where all the potted plants are along the route."
948*
949What a reversal of fortune. Now it was David's turn to drag Jules p flights of stairs, several elevators, and finally a stretch of hallway to open his apartment door and deposit the man inside. At least Jules'd stopped puking. He had, however, started nuzzling into David's neck.
950"Other than the alcohol, I like how you smell," Jules said into David's shirt collar. 
951This night was just getting more and more dangerous, wasn't it?
952"Yeah okay," replied David, and tried to detangle as quickly as possible.
953It had been months since David had last seen Jules' room. Several more comforters had been added to the bed, all in bright colours and currently folded into squares. Jules fully detached, David flopped down onto the pile. Looking up the ceiling was now plastered with a few magazines worth of pictures. Several National Geographics had died for this. There didn't seem to be a preference, lizards, cats, bugs, everything was up there. The only pattern he could tell was a heck of a lot of ant pictures clustered around the bed.
954Okay. Weird.
955Jules stared down at him. "I should have a shower. This will help counteract the effects of the toxin."
956David gave a thumbs up. "Go for it."
957"You should have a shower as well."
958"Probably."
959Jules stared at him. The bugs on the ceiling stared at him. He felt almost sober. He needed more booze. He knew he wouldn't be getting any. 
960Maybe Jules was fine now. But maybe he wasn't. He sure as hell was still sick, and leaving him alone—
961Well, David couldn't just dump him and hope for the best. Hell, even if physically Jules did turn out to be fine from what David recalled from when the shoes had been on different feet leaving sick people alone was just not done on Planet Jules. 
962David had been a dick to the guy, he could at least try to make his first ever hangover less shitty but platonically sleeping on the floor for a night.
963And he was sticking to the floor. The last morning after had opened with enough awkward boner troubles for the rest of David's life thanks. 
964"We could shower together to save resources," said Jules. From the way he said it, it almost sounded innocent.
965That didn't help.
966Looking at the ceiling helped.
967"No, I'm good. Go on ahead there."
968Eventually, Jules did.
969David rolled off the bed and clicked the television on. Shopping channel. Okay.
970He was listening to two men extolling the virtues of chocolate diamonds when Jules stepped out of the bathroom with only his pajama pants on.
971Of course he was ripped. Why this, why any of this.
972At least David didn't like Jules was going to drop dead from poison. A little droopy, maybe but—
973David scanned the room, trying to find something distracting. A sad little leafy thing perched on a stack of amazon boxes by the only window. "Nice plant."
974"The plant is ill," Jules replied. His pants were loose, which was good, but also had a pattern so intricate that David felt if he stared long enough a picture might emerge, like those horrible posters from the 90s. This was bad. "I do not know why."
975"Light, maybe?" Not much plant life survived in Mu, in or outside. But then, David knew jack shit about houseplants as evidenced that even tearing his attention away from the insanity on Jules' legs to study the plants he had no idea what it was. Some sort of kinda cactus thing that wasn't weed. "You can get lamps for that."
976Weed of course, grew anywhere with enough electricity. That was probably applicable here too, right?
977"Plants need light?"
978*
979"We'll have a sleep over." David grabbed one blanket and wrapped it around himself before settling down on the floor in front of the television. "You know: when kids stay up late, braid each other's hair and talk about boys? Do you guys have those?"
980"We do not have those." Jules did not move from where he was adjusting the sad plant. "But I am glad you will be staying. Do you wish to borrow sleeping clothing?"
981David really didn't but it was probably best not to sleep in his suit. It had been through enough.
982An awkward go at washing up in someone else's bathroom later, David had—
983A fuzzy loose two-piece set in pink and purple with two things on the hood that looked suspiciously like ears.
984"It is very warm," said Jules.
985It was.
986As the night progressed somehow David ended covered in blankets, sitting on the floor with his back against the bed, bag of shrimp chips between him and Jules, watching the  Shopping Channel hosts switch from selling overpriced jewelry to slinging overpriced pet clothing, while passing a bottle of ginger ale between the two of them. 
987Jules it seemed, had a soda horde by his fridge.
988"I would like a pet," announced Jules. He'd mostly been silent since his sitting. The after effects of puking up alcoholic cake for his species seemed to be getting very sleepy, and the fuzziness was kinda worrying. Worrying enough David was glad he'd stayed. Just in case.
989David took a long swig of Canadian Dry the passed the soda bottle back to Jules. "Can't, sorry, building rules."
990"I know." Jules' face was kind of red, but yeah, mostly he just looked sleepy. His eyelids drooped. Cute. "But if I were allowed, it would be pleasant to own several cats."
991"A cat?" Shit, Jules was cute. That wasn't a new thought, but at this close a distance, after a night of drinking, it was a dangerous one. His vague gestures was he talked were cute. His weird intonation was cute. The way it all came out earnest instead of contrived was cute. "Would have thought you'd be a dog guy."
992"Dogs appear to require more exercise than I could provide, unless I were allowed to let them roam the hallways."
993"That would definitely not be allowed."
994Jules made a sad noise. A sad cute noise. 
995"Perhaps I would keep an ant farm." Was he brightening? It was hard to tell, his facial expressions were almost normal now, but still off sometimes. Which was cute. "They seem compact. It is possible to order everything online."
996David turned his attention to the show. That was safe. Safe and--wow that dog looked unhappy in its little shoes. "Ugh, please no I don't want to deal with complaints if bugs get loose in the building. We have enough trouble with that in the summer."
997"You do not like bugs." Something about the way Jules said 'bugs' made David feel he was being quoted, also possibly judged. 
998"Well," he hedged, "they get into everything. Trust me, when we hit summer you'll understand. You'll need a hazmat suit to leave the building for about a week unless you want to be sucked dry."
999"Sucked dry?"
1000"You know, mosquitoes?"
1001"No."
1002"Mosquitoes eat people. Google them. They're horrible."
1003"I will." That was another weird thing, Jules had barely touched his phone. David had seen it since they'd sat down, it hadn't been lost somewhere on the way from the party, but David just wasn't looking at it. "But I would be keeping ants, not mosquitos."
1004"Hmm." David tried to sound non-committal.
1005"Ants are very interesting."
1006"Hmmm." He drew it out a bit.
1007"Did you know Linepithema humile, commonly known as the Argentine Ant, have formed a super-colony across the world? Do you know if they reside in Mu?"
1008"I don't know. I mean, we have ants. They're ants?" 
1009A glance to the side showed Jules' was swaying. Oh god Jules was one hundred percent loopy, wasn't he? "Do you think they will be able to conquer the world?"
1010Why was that cute? "What?"
1011"The Linepithema humile super colony."
1012"I hope not?"
1013Jules suddenly looked so sad.
1014"Look, I can tell you like ants from your ceiling collage but they gotta leave some of the world for the rest of the animals up there."
1015Somehow he looked even sadder at this. "You may be right."
1016"Well. Maybe if you ask the King nicely he'll bend the rules. He likes to do that. Just don't let them get lose, and uh, we don't have strict animal import laws, since most stuff dies in the winter, so you could probably get whatever." David could look it up tomorrow. There were probably forms. He knew forms. "But if they get loose in the building you know, the cleaning guys'll be pissed."
1017"I would not want to upset them. I will be careful." Jules began nodding. He took a while to stop. "Ms. Balanovskaya is very nice."
1018
1019David was just going to assume from context that was the janitor for this chunk of the dorms. "Are you sure you feel okay now?"
1020
1021"I am fine." When Jules next passed the ginger ale back, it bumped David's cast. David bit his tongue but maybe he made a tiny squeak. A tiny one. Very tiny and manly. 
1022
1023It'd been a while since his last pill, he was allowed.
1024
1025"It's nothing!" he rushed out at Jules' widened eyes. "No worries. Really."
1026
1027Jules clutched the plastic bottle. "I am sorry. If I had not been late you would not have been injured."
1028
1029Late? How in the hell had Jules been late for anything? "I remember it as you saving my ass. Besides, this is nothing. The last time it broke was worse and it healed fine."
1030
1031"The last time?"
1032
1033David's breath hiccupped. He probably shouldn't have mentioned that. "No, it—"
1034
1035"Your arm was previously broken as well? I did not know that."
1036
1037"Well it's not—" 
1038
1039"Was it a similar attack? I have been concerned about the building's security. There should be more guards at the entrances, especially when your King is in residence." Jules leaned forward, eyes still wide and concerned, mouth frowning.
1040
1041"No this was like, a long time ago." Too long to get in to now. "Broke both actually." And a leg. "Really annoying. So don't worry. My bones are probably weak now. It wasn't your fault." There, that was the important thing. There was zero reason for Jules to be upset about it.
1042
1043"Why?"
1044
1045"Why what?"
1046
1047"Why were you injured?"
1048
1049'That's not your business' died on David's tongue. It wasn't really, but he just couldn't manage to say it this time.
1050
1051So what could he say? Lie? Say he fell down some stairs? He probably should have lied, but damn it was hard to make up a good story when Jules was leaning into his space looking like someone had just run over his future ant farm. "Just pissed off the wrong people. It happens."
1052
1053"That is not something that should happen!"
1054
1055"It happens?"
1056
1057Jules pulled back, finally. "Earth is a cruel place."
1058
1059It wasn't as if David could disagree, but the way Jules drooped, he really wanted to. But all he could do was lamely put a hand on the guy's shoulder in a way that was hopefully comforting. "Well, you know. There's okay stuff. It's just been a day." He checked his watch. "Don't make important calls on the status of the world at three am, it never goes well."
1060
1061Jules' face fell onto David's shoulder, his eyes closing. "Tell me good things."
1062
1063"Uh." David's arm twinged but 'Mu has universal health care' was probably not the joke to make right now.
1064
1065 At this angle, Jules' hair fell into his face. His stupidly handsome face. It was so generically Hollywood pretty that it was kind of boring, like a hundred pictures of actors had been tossed into one of those neural network things.
1066
1067Well, Jules was a robot or something. Maybe that was exactly how it'd happened.
1068
1069And somehow, that thought made it cute.
1070
1071Jules' started trying to cap the bottle, fumbling until David gave up and took it away. "I also do not like hands."
1072
1073"Hands are okay," David managed. 
1074
1075"No. They are bad." And the possibility that he didn't always have hands was—
1076
1077Cute, explained some things, but also sorta concerning? "You'll get used to them?"
1078
1079"Perhaps you are right." Jules face turned, nose now against David's neck. 
1080
1081The TV switched over to a new product. Something entirely frivolous about embossing cards. Pretty, but David sure as hell had no use for it. Who would he even send cards to? The foil was nice and shiny though. Whoa, that one had rainbows.
1082
1083He only realized he hadn't given Jules any 'good things' at the same time he noticed that Jules had fallen asleep on his shoulder.
1084*
1085"You trying to joke?"
1086A huge hand, so big it circled his neck. Rough calluses scraped skin as the grip tightened.
1087"You like to fuck monsters, Davey?" 
1088His toes lifted off the floor. He couldn't breathe.
1089"This getting you off?"
1090And then the drop, the quick backing away when Al realised he was.
1091"Wait, you uh, you seriously are?"
1092A long pause as David tied to regain his breath, sink into the wall, and kill a boner with his mind.
1093"…Is your neck okay?"
1094*
1095David had a crick in his neck. He was also on Jules' bed and under a pile of covers. Jules hadn't left a note but there was a text message on David's phone.
1096Jules: I apologise. I must go to work but when I attempted to wake you there was a confrontation.
1097Jules: I believe you were still partially asleep.
1098Jules: Is your arm well?
1099Then, timestamped several hours later, was a picture of a destroyed robot, as if to prove Jules was really gone for work and not just ditching him.
1100Jules: robot23.jpg
1101Jules: Why does the number of these continue to increase?
1102Jules: No one appears to know their origin.
1103Jules: This is concerning.
1104David rolled towards the—still on, okay sure--television and wiggled out of the bed just far enough to change the channel to news. Then after consideration, bumped down the volume.
1105Of course someone had tried to crash the festivities that morning. And yes, it was the same robots that'd attacked the lobby, which meant dollars to dounuts it was the same people behind both. 
1106Yay.
1107The wrecks from this would get hauled to the labs just like everything else did, and the creepy intelligence guys whose job it was to figure out who was trying to fuck with Mu this week would be doing their creepy intelligence shit.
1108David: Even if the suits know, they won't tell anyone.
1109There was no way in Icey Hell they weren’t already antsy about having a genuine space alien in the country. It was only due to him being the King's newest shiny toy that he wasn't getting interrogated daily and locked up in a cell. Or at least an ankle bracelet or something.
1110No, instead David was supposed to be getting information out of him, a little annoying bit of his mind whispered.
1111Jules: You are likely correct.
1112Jules: Good morning.
1113"Morning," David typed after a pause then slammed his head back into the pillows.
1114Half an hour or so later David roused enough to watch a rerun of the King's newest speech on Jules' TV. He wanted water. He was too lazy to get water. Everything hurt. His arm, his pride, but mostly his head.
1115Good thing he had the morning off, this was a hell of a hangover.
1116He wrapped another of the blankets around him. He could just go back to sleep, burrito bury himself in blankets, and wait until Jules wandered back from work, then ask him for water.
1117Or he could be a good adult, sneak back to his own room, have a shower, then get his ass to his job in time for the half-day.
1118"Ugh."
1119He rolled, several blankets hitting the ground with him. Goddamn these were comfy.
1120There were some more texts from Jules as David forced his way through getting to work. Pictures, a link to a video of an angry frog.
1121David: Frog giving you trouble?
1122Jules: ???
1123Jules: I do not understand?
1124Jules: I apologise the video was cute I did not mean to imply anything about Frog.
1125Jules: She is a valuable member of our workplace.
1126Then.
1127DA KING: Send me a selfie right now.
1128Uh oh.
1129David: Good morning, sir
1130DA KING: I know you are in Mr Gagarin's room.
1131David: I'm in the hallway now
1132He sent a picture of the nearest window. Dark and grey and slightly condensing. He'd have to ask the building guys to check the weather seals. The picture could do double duty.
1133DA KING: I heard he got sick last night.
1134David: Alcohol is bad for space aliens
1135The King of Mu sent him a thinking emoji.
1136DA KING: Be at my office at 5 and give a full report :)
1137Fuck.
1138*
1139David drained his coffee. Retrieved the envelope from the drawer. Took the ring out. Set it on the papers he should work on.
1140Stared at it for a while.
1141Went to get some more shitty coffee.
1142Drank the coffee.
1143The coffee was horrible. The ring gave no answers. David kind of wanted to throw up.
1144And more great news: he'd lied to Jules. Sure he hadn't meant to, but the fact of the matter was the guy's dreams of ant farms were going to be smashed. Of the list of species Jules had given him over text, all seemed to be a no-go for import. David'd been bugging a contact in customs since noon and it was possible he was starting to burn bridges
1145"wtf no " had been the answer on Linepithema humile.
1146"What if he was really careful?"
1147"NO"
1148Turned out the 'everything dies up here anyways' rhetoric mostly went for not-insects. 
1149Jules: This is a testament to their capability. I understand.
1150Jules: sadlookinganimal241.jpg
1151Dear god why was that number so high?
1152Jules: I will bring beverages. Please choose one.
1153A photo of a chalkboard dinged into existence on David's phone. Ah, Jules' favourite place.
1154Jules: Unless you would like to join me.
1155It had been days of not going outside, and he knew, he really did that he was being an idiot. If his fears were valid, then he needed to tell security. I they weren't then he was being a stupid coward. 
1156David: Grab me whatever that blue thing is and a muffin. Find a seat. Be there in 15.
1157Jules: OK
1158Jules: happymouseclimbsflower.jpg
1159He pocketed the ring and went out for lunch.
1160* Café Tomakomai was very busy. During peak times, such as the current hour, lines frequently went out the door. Every table was in use. One frequently had to sit in the tunnel outside on the benches unless you were content to stand. Everyone talked at once, a constant murmur of conversation. It smelled of food, drink, wood, and people. Jules liked it very much.
1161When it was his turn to order he made sure to obtain David's 'blue thing' and the most nutritious looking muffin on offer. This one had multiple types of fruit, and chocolate. He waited for the food and beverages to be prepared, then attempted to find an area where two people could sit. He was unable to. Thus he waited outside.
1162He sent David a picture of a happy bat. 
1163It had been an unexpected but pleasant surprise when David had said he would meet Jules.  Had the circumstances that kept him indoors expired? If so, the cause had not been the weather. Although the temperature had raised slightly, the wind had made up for any warmth and today again the sky released snow. 
1164Why a city of such size was placed in such conditions so unaccommodating to Human life, Jules had no idea. Even the tunnel system could only do so much. The JHQ did not even directly connect to the main thoroughfare, a poor design choice. It forced Jules to bring a bag to carry protective garments he would need only to cross that gap between door and door.
1165Jules found a suitable bench just as David arrived. 
1166"Thanks," David said as he took the blue beverage from Jules. Their hands touched. David had his gloves on still, but Jules could still feel warmth.
1167David's general behaviour was still incomprehensible, but based on the previous night Jules could hope that now their relationship was mended. Whatever had gone wrong before seemed to have been avoided this time. There were too many variables to know what exactly had made the difference. That Jules had left the room first? That David had volunteered to stay? That it had been Jules who had been at disadvantage due to his poisoning? That they had slept in a different room? 
1168Or, maybe Jules was unable to read Humans at all and analysis was futile.
1169He would simply have to take what he could get. David, like all other Humans Jules had met, would only let him comes so close to some invisible line Jules could not sense, and than no further. He had hoped David would be different. 
1170"Here is your muffin," said Jules.
1171"Thanks." David studied it a moment. "I'll pay next time."
1172That there would be a next time would have to be sufficient.
1173"You okay?" David said after starting to consume the muffin. "You still kinda look like shit."
1174Similes were still strange but Jules could at least recognise the now. "I am fine."
1175They sat. Consumed food. David talked more than Jules. Perhaps he was still ill. He knew he should be happy David had come to meet him, but he could not manage it.
1176He tested, allowing his posture to slacken, causing his shoulder to touch against David's. The point of contact was warm. David did not move away.
1177"This blue thing is just a London Fog with dye. Damn." David's gloved hand tapped David's knee. It was also the injured one. This time he spoke lower. "Really, you alright? Those bots didn't get any good hits in or anything, right?" 
1178Then a hole was punched through the ceiling. This was in some ways a welcome distraction.
1179First, Jules covered David to ensure he was not harmed by debris. Then he the scanned the area to ascertain if anyone else had been less fortunate. There appeared to be no casualties. Several store gates slammed shut as he looked about, and those people still in the tunnel were in the process of fleeing.  
1180Jules suspected they were used to such situations. The constant violence of this city was distressing.
1181More distressing, however, was the gasp of pain he heard from below him. "David?"
1182David cradled his cast tight against his body, leaving the sling slack. His face was greyish, pinched, and beginning to perspire, common signs of pain and illness. Jules had stopped the debris from hitting him, but Jules had not taken enough of the landing on himself. 
1183David grimaced, contorting his features. "Just cracked the cast. Not dead. Go punch stuff." The words were strained. He would again need medical attention. 
1184Jules resolved to end the fight quickly.
1185The cause of the disturbance was obvious as soon as the dust began to settle. A lone robot stood under the hole that now let in snow and horrible cold from the surface.
1186The first oddity of this situation was that the robot was alone. In the previous two attacks there had been a small swarm. Perhaps this was a left over from the morning's attack? However, the design was also slightly different. While it still had the more stable design choice of four legs, the overall casing was more complicated, more mirroring a proper outer shell design than the clunky misshapen globular style the others had been built with. 
1187It was distressingly familiar in a way that felt almost physically painful. Was this what he had heard referred to as nostalgia? He did not like it.
1188This robot was also faster. Jules could barely dodge in time to keep what limbs he had. It was stronger. The tiles of the tunnel floor suffered for it.
1189It turned towards where David slumped against the wall, still clutching his cast. Unacceptable.
1190When it lunged, Jules grabbed its neck.
1191STOP
1192The sensation hit Jules' inadequate senses with a force that blurred his vision.
1193STOP we are of the same side DO NOT ATTACK do not interfere do not move help DO NOT RESIST help do not attack HELP do not move do not attack do not interferer do not do not move do not
1194His internal lower organs twisted.
1195HELP
1196STOP
1197Jules attempted reply, only realising too late that he no longer had the organs required to respond any way other than verbally.
1198"Jules, watch out!"
1199Something collided with his face. A limb. The robot had punched him. It. No it was not an it. Jules knew them. 
1200He knew them.
1201"Stop!"
1202Jules did not know who said that.
1203There was a loud noise.
1204The robot who Jules knew fell back.
1205David leaned against the wall. He held a gun. 
1206The robot who Jules knew who had been shot jumped up, and out of the hole.
1207Jules could not move his legs. He attempted to several times.
1208Then he was on the ground. Then David knelt beside him.
1209"Jesus!" David was touching him, shaking him with one arm. "Jules! Come on! Wake up!" He swore more.
1210Finally, Jules regained command of his own body. He stood. David clung to him and did as well.
1211Jules moved towards the hole in the ceiling. David yanked him back by the zipper of his coat. 
1212"Wait, hold up. The heating in here not going to survive much longer, and it's still below double digits up there," he rambled, hastily putting his own protective clothing back together. "Where's your hat and shit?"
1213"I must follow," said Jules. His hat, scarves, and mittens were in his bag, by the bench. David had a point. The cold could no longer be ignored. Jules would need his protective clothing in order to engage pursuit.
1214"We gotta—"
1215"I must follow," Jules repeated. He leaned against the wall to absorb what warmth he could as he struggled with his mitts. "Immediately."
1216"Nope." David was communicating with someone on his phone. "You're not following it. I'm calling this in, you're putting your winter gear on, then we go home." He glanced up. "The fuck was that anyway?"
1217Whether by 'that' David meant the robot that Jules knew, or how Jules had acted, Jules found he did not care. Only one action was important. "I cannot let them get away."
1218David's hand came up to press against Jules' chest, pushing him lightly against the wall. "Yeah, you can and you will. Because it's already gone. Because—"
1219Jules stepped forward. David grimaced. His face paled.
1220He had been restraining Jules with his injured arm.
1221"I may have possibly broken my arm again."
1222It occurred to Jules then that David may have used his injured arm on purpose. Such manipulation was distressingly common behaviour for Humans. And it would work. If David was hurt, Jules would have to take him to the medical staff.
1223David's smile was not real. It twitched. "It's got to be long gone by now."
1224David was likely correct. Too much time had been taken to follow using sight and sound. The snow would have destroyed any scent trail Jules could still trace in this body.
1225He could not follow.
1226For the first time, Jules was truly angry at David. 
1227"Let's get back to the JHQ, yes?"
1228Reluctantly, Jules complied.
1229*
1230David had broken his arm again. 
1231
1232The tech looked at him. Looked at his x-rays. "You work in the office?"
1233
1234"Yes," said David. 
1235
1236He got a new cast. He got a new bottle of pills to add to his collection. 
1237
1238Then he had about two minutes to get to the King's office.
1239
1240It had sure been a day.
1241
1242"I see that," the King said, leaning back in his chair. "These robots, they are becoming a problem, aren't they?"
1243
1244"I guess." It wasn't exactly the first time some place had sent robot minions. They just kept getting cheaper to make. It was a boom industry, really.
1245
1246"But our dear space friend certainly seems interested in them, doesn't he?"
1247
1248Well, David still suspected Jules was a robot. Maybe they made him homesick.
1249
1250"I wonder if you're not wrong."
1251
1252"Please don't dissect him to find out." God, that was probably why he didn't want to go to the nurse's office. The creep intelligence people would take the opportunity to cut him up like this was in a grainy  video from the 90s narrated by Commander Riker.
1253
1254"You worry too much, you know." There was the standard pot of tea on the King's left. Normally Jules would pour, but it seemed his Majesty was making allowances for his employee managing to break his arm twice within the month, as he made his own damn tea, then smiled. "But perhaps we should be concerned on this matter. Our Jules sound to have been acting rather strange."
1255
1256"The robot did something to him." It had been freaky as fuck. Like a switch had been flicked, like he'd just blanked out, like—
1257
1258David didn't really know like what but it was bad. The whole way back to JHQ Jules had seemed off.  Like when he'd been drunk he hadn't been on his phone, he'd barely talked and when he had, well he sure had sounded. Well. 
1259
1260Daniel was used to people being angry at him and it had sure seemed like Jules was pissed. 
1261Not that the King would be happy to hear that.
1262
1263"I am not," the King confirmed. "However, you were right to not let him run off. This incident is concerning on multiple levels, but if say, that robot were to capture Jules, who knows what5 could happen to the poor boy? Perhaps I will have to reign in his freedoms if our enemies are able to enthrall him so."
1264
1265Fuck it. "Do you know what they are? The robots?"
1266
1267"I do not. Yet. I have people on this." The King produced a twin of his cup from a drawer. Filled it. Pushed it towards David.  "I'm not convinced this attack is related to the latest batch we've had after Jules' arrival. This one not only looked different, but Jules had has no issue destroying them before either. So why would this one be different?"
1268
1269"I mean, you know what I know." And what David knew was unfortunately jackshit.
1270
1271"Indeed."
1272
1273Okay, so David hadn't have much to tell, but they could at least be sure of one thing: Jules wasn't a threat.  
1274
1275Jules was weird, really weird, but he was a nice guy. In the real way, not in the 'complains about girls on the internet' way. He was from a planet of probably robots who all always hung around each other, was allergic to alcohol, really liked animal pictures, was addicted to his phone, ate too much sugar, and was super lonely. Also he had amazing muscles, could pick David up like it was nothing, gave nice hugs, and his weird attempts at facial expressions were cute, but David was attempting to repress that. 
1276
1277The King gave David a look.
1278
1279The point was, Jules wasn't a threat to Earth. That was the important thing to focus on here. Not a danger. Nope. That's all.
1280
1281"He's not," David repeated out loud, just to underline.
1282
1283"David." The King took a long sip of his tea. "I don't mean this as quite the insult it may sound to be, but you do realise that you are historically a terrible judge of character?"
1284
1285Hey now.
1286
1287"And while I did request that you steer him away from my son's advances I did not quite intend for you to bed him either." After another sip he continued. "Twice."
1288
1289Hey, those sleepovers had been entirely platonic even if—Oh fuck don't think about boners in front of the King of Mu, fuck.
1290
1291"However." The King gave set down his empty cup. "I want more in depth information than 'his species is exceedingly clingy'. Luckily when it comes to gathering information, nothing is as fruitful as pillow talk. So I am officially condoning this seduction."
1292
1293David ended up drinking none of his tea.
1294* David: Since our date was so rudely interrupted
1295'Date.' Whatever, the King wanted David to fucking honeypot. Everyone had gone mad. Insane. Nuts.
1296David: Let's hang out
1297David: And by that I mean I will fall asleep on your floor watching the Shopping Channel again
1298There, that was right.
1299For half a minute David could see that Jules was typing. But no message came.
1300Goddamnit.
1301David scrolled back up their conversation, saved sadlookinganimal241.jpg and sent it back to him.
1302Jules still did not reply.
1303DA KING: He' trying to smooth talk his way into the labs and by smooth talk I mean the guards would like to shoot him.
1304DA KING: map.jpg
1305Just fucking great.
1306He texted Jules again, making his way as quickly towards the right wing as he could manage with meds and sheer exhaustion starting to wear. 
1307He stopped at a corner. Braced against the wall. 
1308Still no answer.
1309Fuck it. He called Jules. Ring ring motherfucker.
1310After a few moments, Jules picked up. "Hello?" he asked as if no one had actually done anything other than text him before.
1311"David here. Finally got released. Bad news: the cast you signed was a casualty. Worse news: I feel like shit. Sleepover: yes/no?"
1312There was a long pause. Long enough David wondered if this wouldn't work. 
1313He heard someone yell at Jules in the background.
1314"You okay over there?" asked David.
1315"I am attempting to gather information on the robots," Jules answered.
1316"Cool. Do that tomorrow morning when the techs don't all want to go home."
1317His meds were somewhere in his pockets. He just had to find the right one. His fingers hit a cylinder of metal he'd been happy to forget.
1318"Jules." His voice maybe came out a little strained. "Whatever is going on, deal with it in the morning. Don't get your ass arrested. You want a request for information form? I can get you that. We'll pick up a stack on the way to your apartment."
1319"You sound ill."
1320"I am very damn ill." David slumped harder against the wall. Sleeping in the hallway was becoming an attractive option.
1321He heard a little more shouting over the phone. Then, finally. "I will meet you at your office."
1322"Okay. See you there." Great. Now David just had to drag his ass to a different wing. It was going to be a long night.
1323*
1324Jules had been waiting many minutes at the locked door to the archival office block when David finally arrived. The anger had not left him from the afternoon. It was an almost physical burning inside his abdomen now. Drinking water did not help. He did not know what else he could do other than eliminate the cause of his unhappiness. But he couldn't.
1325He needed to find his comrade. To save them from whatever had been done to them. Now.
1326He could not. So many things, so many people, put themselves in his way. And this route that David had given him was the same. Filling a form, submitting it, waiting, more waiting. No action.
1327He attempted to turn the doorknob once more, even though he knew it would not turn. His hand shook as he let go.
1328Frog messaged him on telegram. Jules did not respond. He had not since she had declined helping him enter the labs. Pink Falcon posted an announcement on her feed that she would be attending a premiere of a film in Los Angles, United States of America. Falcon X and Little Pink commented. Jules did not. 
1329He swiped through his contacts on LINE. The Prince of Mu had added himself through QR code not long after their first meeting. It was possible that if Jules acquiesced to his interests that he could give Jules access to areas of the building others could not.
1330There was noise. David shambled into the dark hallway, then flicked on the lights. "Don't stare at the phone in the dark. It'll kill your eyes." Most of the man's weight was on the wall. "Well, probably."
1331He looked ill. Very ill.
1332Jules stomach, full of imaginary acid, now felt as if it were in an elevator that had stopped too suddenly.
1333"Please sit," Jules said. There were chairs for visitors to wait in, constructed of bright orange vinyl and fake wood stickers over wood core. Jules had used them many times.  "If you give me the key, then I will find the papers myself."
1334David pushed himself off the wall then walked to the locked door. "Like Hell, you'll either never find the right forms or destroy the filing system." A beep of the electronic key and the door clicked open. "Stand still for a bit. I gotta stop the auto-alarm."
1335When David tripped on the carpeting on his way back, Jules caught his arm. The uninjured arm.
1336"I apologise," Jules said. "You should be resting, not aiding me."
1337Contrary to Jules expectations David leaned into him. "It's fine. This sort of thing is actually my job."
1338David was faster than Jules had worried in finding the correct forms. The copy machine was less efficient.  David hit it several times.
1339The suggestion was made by David to fill the forms out at Jules' room. Jules would then submit them at the beginning of work hours the next morning.
1340Too slow, but the only option Jules had. Unless. Possibly. "If we were to ask your King directly for clearance—"
1341David cut Jules off. "We are going to go to your apartment, put the TV on, have a shower, then sleep. On the way we can even hold hands."
1342While the first section of that list did make sense, that last action was an odd addition until Jules followed David's line of sight to his own hands. They were still shaking. He had not even noticed.  He tried to force them still. "I appreciate that you are attempting to make me feel better, but I cannot." 
1343"I know," said David, then began making his way towards the hallway. He leaned on many pieces of furniture along the way.
1344Jules attempted a sigh. Long breath in. Long breath out. His eyes closed. He dropped his posture. Sighing he found, did not actually help him feel better about defeat. For that was what this was, even if it were only temporary.
1345David locked up. Clicked the light off. "It's a longshot, but maybe you'll feel less shit in the morning."
1346"I do not see how." 
1347David only shrugged and, as he had previously offered, took Jules' hand. 
1348Perhaps David had a point. If Jules faced the robot who he knew in such a condition, what help would he really be?
1349None, and that was also unacceptable. He would need to fix himself.
1350"Do you require anything from your own rooms?" Jules asked when they were in the first elevator.
1351"I could pass out anywhere," David replied, and he did not seem to be lying.
1352Jules gripped the hand in his tighter. It was calming in a way, to focus on the sensation of David's hand in his. Warmth, pressure. The slightest ebb and flow of the pulse.
1353David was not in his way. David was helping him. Not everything was unacceptable. "We should eat. I have left over fruit salad in the fridge."
1354Jules could not help one of his cohort, but that did not excuse neglecting his newfound ally to the point they might collapse in the hallway. Jules had been remiss. "I apologise for keeping you from rest."
1355David shook his head. "It's fine." 
1356Jules suspected he was lying as Humans tended to do when they said those words. Jules had also picked up the habit. Before he had arrive at Earth, there had been no reason to lie about anything. Although he had known it would be necessary for his mission, in practice—
1357Everything was more difficult than it was supposed to have been, for one reason: he was alone in it.
1358"Are you certain?"
1359"Yes."
1360"You'll stay until morning?"	
1361"Yes." There was an odd cadence to this repetition but Jules could not decipher what it meant.
1362The apartment was reached with little incident. Frustration still ate through Jules' body as if it were a physical parasite, but he would have to realign his concerns, at least for the night. David's weight grew heavier, and by the end Jules almost carried him. In his fervor to find his comrade, Jules had neglected his current ally, who now suffered for it.
1363This thought only increased his internal, possibly imagined, pain.
1364Jules paused as they entered his room, their hands still linked but their arms spread as David stumbled on. "You will not have clothes for tomorrow or to sleep in. Would you like to borrow mine?"
1365David hesitated, glancing at Jules' closet. "Okay, but if you try to take pictures I'm gone."
1366"I did not take pictures last time, even-though you said it would last longer."
1367David's response, as far as Jules could ascertain, not composed of actual words. He then let go of Jules and dropped to the bed. 
1368"Are you--?"
1369"Sleep now."
1370David would need a shower, but Jules did as well. There wold be no harm in letting David rest while Jules went first. Perhaps the water would stop his shaking. David had not commented, but surely he had noticed. 
1371The water did not help.
1372He dried, dressed. He braced his hands against the condensation that collected on the bathroom door. When he pressed, they had to remain still.
1373David had not moved from his position on the bed. Possibly, it was best to leave him, let him recover through sleep. But he had not showered yet. Being clean before entring your bed was important, even if it was not here it was on Jules' home. In /Jules' home. He had to have standards, he had to keep to something.
1374Gently, he touched David's uninjured arm. David murmured, but did not stir further.
1375The room was quiet. Jules had not thought to turn the television on when they had entered. He had been too distracted. He did now. The Shopping Channel filled the quiet but it did not help as it normally did.
1376"David," Jules said. "You need to shower before sleeping. I have a bag to cover your cast."
1377"Meh," David mumbled. "Lemme sleep."
1378"Please," Jules said. "At least change your clothing. You should not sleep in your suit."
1379David batted him off.
1380"Please," Jules said.
1381David remained uncompliant. He was likely still asleep. Jules wanted to shake him. That was unwise. David had broken his arm only a few hours ago. Jules's own hands were still shaking. He needed to stop. 
1382He needed to.
1383"David, please." He shoved David onto his side.
1384"Ow." David said the word flat. "Fine. God. Gimme a minute." 
1385David did not move. 
1386He did not understand. Jules had to make him understand. If there was at least one other being that understood, maybe it would not hurt so much. "It is important--"
1387To be clean before sleeping. To not maintain proper hygiene protocol was unacceptable. To not do ones basic duty was unacceptable. To stand here, not doing anything to find his other comrades was---
1388Everything was wrong and he could not even communicate the importance of the most basic standards.
1389"I cannot do this," he said, except he did not. His throat did not open as it should. The air that should have been released trapped inside his neck, causing sharp pain.
1390At this a chain reaction spread across his body. His skin felt hot, his eyes burned, the area above his nose congested and radiated an ache across his face.
1391"I cannot," he repeated, because possibly David had not heard him that first time and no malfunctioning throat would stop him from declaring the truth now, to make David understand. "Everything is wrong."
1392David looked at him now, wide eyes, frozen but awake. Perhaps he was scared. This was also wrong, but Jules did not know what to do. He could not do anything.
1393Jules clenched his hands in the pillows around David's head in an attempt to stop the shaking. But all of him was shaking now. "It should not be like this. I should not be alone."
1394It should not have been an 'I.' He should not have to be an 'I.' He was meant to be a 'we.' Not this. He had been made for a mission to Earth, to be changed, to face obstacles, but not this. How was he supposed to work correctly like this? He couldn't!
1395David began swearing. 
1396"I apologise," Jules started, before being tugged downward as David pulled himself up to meet halfway. He was hugged.
1397"Hey, it's okay." David's cast dug into Jules' stomach. His weight precariously hung on Jules' shoulders. He spoke into Jules' hair more than his ear. "You didn't do anything wrong. I'll have a fucking shower. It's okay."
1398"No." Now that David was holding him the idea of him stopping was unacceptable. Jules buried his own face as much into David's neck as he could, against the coolness of David's skin. Why was his face so hot? Why did his face hurt so much? His eyes watered but there was nothing in them to cause it. "Stay here."
1399David's reply was quick. ."Okay." 
1400He was still alarmed. Jules was scaring him. This was wrong.
1401"Please."
1402"Okay, I won't go anywhere, just—on second here." David shuffled himself in such a way as to take his weight from Jules. "There. Okay?"
1403"No."
1404David's arm moved. His hand found Jules and covered it. The shaking was forced to lessen under his grip.
1405David did not have the capacity to fix what was wrong with Jules. He needed to find the others for that. However, David was trying. Jules was not alone. There was someone right there, even if they could not understand.
1406"Thank you." He was not alone. David was there. David had already helped him in his search. He had promised to continue to do so. Nothing was okay. But there was David. That was almost okay.
1407"Hey, it..." David trailed off. He sighed. Perhaps the action helped him more than it did Jules. "Don't worry. I'll look after ya."
1408That was almost good.
1409"Okay," Jules said.
1410"Okay," David confirmed.
1411They sat for a reasonably long amount of time. Slowly, Jules' shaking lessened until it almost stopped.
1412Jules sneezed into David's hair. 
1413David hummed. "Maybe I should have a shower after all."
1414*
1415David showered as fast as possible. He ate the fruit salad Jules presented to him at the door. He wrapped up in a dozen blankets and a half dressed space alien.
1416He wrote and erased a text message to the King that said 'I can't do this' about five times.
1417At some point Jules went still, but he was just asleep. He wasn't dead or anything.
1418David stared at his phone. Then the ceiling. Then he shifted a little to watch the TV. They were selling ugly leggings now.
1419Jules pulled at him in his sleep, tugging him back.
1420David was in so much trouble. There was no way he wasn't going to fuck this up, fuck Jules up.
1421For fucks sake his most successful relationship had started with the guy slamming him against a wall. While David was pretty sure Jules could physically manage that—which was not what David needed to be imagining while the guy was half on top of him oh God bringing this up had been a mistake. 
1422There was part of the problem. It wasn't like David didn't want to bang. Part of him really, really did, but he had been supressing that. He had worked so hard to supress that.
1423But he had some fucking morals. Really he did.
1424Jules needed help and that help was totally not a fuck. Especially not with David of all people.
1425'Don't worry. I'll look after ya.'
1426Stealing lines from murderous exes. David was already on a roll.
1427Oh, the TV was selling ugly shirts now.
1428At some point, exhaustion took him out. 
1429When he woke the situation was much worse.
1430Jules was already awake, and staring at him. 
1431David meanwhile, had about the same reaction to waking up covered in Jules as he had the first time. Except now he really couldn't justify running out the door and not responding to texts for a week.
1432"Good morning," said Jules. He at least looked less like he was about to burst into tears than the previous night. "I awoke earlier and filled out a draft version the forms. Could you check them for me?"
1433"Okay," David replied, processing slowly that meant Jules had gotten up, made himself use a pen, then decided getting back into bed and snuggling David was a good plan.
1434Jules pressed right up against David's front. There was no way he didn't feel that. But if he did, why didn't he say something?
1435"I'll just have a quick shower then grab a clean suit from my apartment," David managed. Wait, shit, they needed food. The office had shitty coffee but no food. What time was it? Was the one pizza place that'd deliver into JHQ open yet? Normally David would send Jules to grab something but—
1436Jules frowned.
1437"You'll be with me we'll uh, grab food later."
1438"I can come with you?"
1439"Yeah." After last night, no way David was letting Jules out of his sight. Even with a sleep to gloss that panic over, that had been fucking terrifying. 
1440Unfortunately it seemed Jules took David's 'yeah' to mean he could come with David to the shower.
1441"No, wait, just, wait here."
1442"But you said—"
1443Jules would be fine for five minutes with a door slammed in his face. Probably.
1444David rushed through his shower while trying to be very quiet and not think about what if Jules had joined him. The space alien was just clingy. That didn't mean David should take advantage of it.
1445Except the King of the damn country had ordered him too. Well, maybe he'd been joking. As long as David got Jules comfortable enough to blab enough secrets about space aliens David didn't really have to bang an alien.
1446Probably.
1447The only time Jules had mentioned banging, he hadn't been too enthusiastic. Although, that had been about Prince Idiot. There'd been that weird kiss talk but that had been about language or something. 
1448Did space robots even fuck? For crying out loud did Jules even have a dick? Did it work? What was gonna come outta there? Could robots carry space STDs? 
1449Damnit, David was going to have to go buy condoms for the first time in over a decade. The price had probably gone up. 
1450Fucking inflation.
1451It was, in the end a very unsatisfying shower wank.
1452More fruit salad, hand holding on the way to David's apartment, hurrired changing, hand holding, terrible coffee, hand holding.
1453Some form editing, submitting, and then.
1454Well, what to do with Jules for the rest of the day? Unless he was called out for an emergency, and David strongly suspected he was getting put on the no go list until this mystery was solve like they were Scooby doo, the talent tended to just loiter around the JHQ like bored teens in a mall. Most weeks, Frog was the only one who actually earned her pay. Mu did have actual police after all. Really they did, and unless there was some over the top robot attack—
1455So what to do?
1456Because Jules was already pacing David office.
1457He couldn't send him for food. He couldn't leave him alone. 
1458But, David had actual work.
1459There was one option. Dangerous. Possibly disastrous.
1460He could let Jules loose in the archives.
1461There was enough information in there on older robot attacks to fill days of reading. But on the other hand, it could cause weeks of re-filing.
1462Jules was still pacing. He didn't seem to be shaking.
1463Fuck it.
1464It was only after he closed the door behind Jules, hoping this wasn't a terrible mistake, that he noticed he'd missed about a bajillion texts.
1465Most were unimportant or easy enough to reply to on his way back to his office.
1466There was one odd one.
1467The Frog: take this
1468The Frog: coupon.jpg
1469It appeared to be a scannable QR code.
1470David: What is it?
1471The Frog: jules is not allowed out alone 
1472The Frog: take him
1473What?
1474David checked his messages again. Oh, okay yeah there was a note sent to the active talent spreedsheet thing (it had a real name, but David didn't really care) that Jules was off-duty and confined to the building until further notice due to 'injury.'
1475Well either through official announcements or gossip, that information was spreading fast.
1476David: OK, what is it?
1477The Frog: Free entry
1478The Frog: Catfe
1479David: WTF is catfe
1480*
1481The room was a long corridor that wrapped around the backs of several offices, each side lined with shelves, the shelves filled with files. The basic numerical system took little time to understand, especially with David's list of codes to use in locating the robot related sections. Jules found the relevant works then piled them on the table. It was of weak construction but held the mass well enough.
1482The chair was similarly of poor make. Odd, considering the chairs and desks Jules had seen in the offices had been much more sturdy, and comfortable.
1483Then he read.
1484This took much time.
1485David had said he wasn't allowed to take photos with his phone, but neither had he confiscated it. Jules instead only used it to confirm information with other sources online.
1486After many papers that were otherwise interesting but not relevant to his search, David interrupted to announce the arrival of delivery pizza. Which Jules was not allowed to consume inside the file room. Nor was he allowed to bring any of the files with him to David's office. Still, David had accessed some of the digitalized reports on his work computer which Jules was allowed to peruse if he only used the hand that did not hold pizza.
1487"My keyboard looks like hell already, okay?"
1488David was being as helpful as he could. Now, with some path to follow, even if it was weak, and food and sleep inside him, it was slightly easier to see that, and let it bandage his impatience and need. Jules could not save the robot he knew alone, but he had made allies here. Even if they were not as forthcoming as he desired, they could help. 
1489It would have to be enough. There was nothing else.
1490Robot attacks were, as Jules had previously fears, alarmingly common. That there had been two to three in the past three months was not a noticeable increase. Most seemed to come from a handful of manufacturers in China, who were only legally allowed to sell them for non-violent services. This law did not seem to be well enforced. There was much information on various governments purchasing them in bulk for their militaries. This was illegal in the view of the government of Mu and an area of high contention between several nations. Earth was as always a very fractured place. 
1491However, what details that were not blacked out with sharpie, which Jules could still smell on the most recent papers, seemed to differ from the ones Jules had seen himself. 
1492Generally they were based off of the humanoid bipedal form, as precarious as it was, or wheeled. Some had been built with four legs, based, Jules supposed, off the more stable method most non-insects seemed to prefer, but none of those had the upper body supporting arms. The simple configuration of limbs Jules had thought to be manufacturers being sensible was actually a sign off something new, something he should have paid closer attention to.
1493He had been stupid, making assumptions—
1494"Hey," David tapped Jules' arm with his cellphone. "How the hell do you scan a QR code if it's already on your phone?"
1495"I could scan the code with my own phone," said Jules.
1496"Your froggy friend sent it," explained David when the image popped up. It appeared to be a dining establishment. "We could go after work or—"
1497"—I have many files to complete," interrupted Jules. At David's frown he continued. "I apologise. May we go tomorrow?"
1498David shrugged. "Sure, whatever. You can't take that shit out of the filing room though, remember? And I'm not allowed to access this stuff on my phone so…"
1499The digital files sadly did not give him any more relevant information. He finished his portion of the pizza. Then after David made him wash his hands in the nearby washroom, Jules returned to the filing room.
1500There were four remaining hours until David's regular shift would end, although it was not unusual for him to stay late. However, Jules had been wrong earlier. He did not need any extra time, he finished the remaining files too quickly, and once more, he sat with no clear idea of how top proceed. He knew now only that he required information on the recent robots for certain.
1501Jules stared at the files he had read. The unease was returning. He pressed his hands flat against the vinyl of the tabletop.
1502Perhaps there were other files here he could use. He scanned the wall from his seat. Nothing seemed relevant.
1503David's attempt to help had led to nothing.
1504His—
1505David had tried. He would likely continue to do so.
1506David…
1507Before, Jules had a plan. He would integrate himself into this new world as much as he could. He would try to establish some sort of bond that could fill the void of being alone. David had seemed the best prospect. He was kind to Jules. He was otherwise unattached. Jules had thought David was attracted to him. Yet there had been no action, and then the retreat after the night of David's injury—
1508But this morning confirmed that David was sexually attracted to him, did it not? Jules had done research on the signs of human sexual attraction and that had been a clear sign. If so, why had David not acted upon it? Jules had given him ample opportunity.
1509It seemed as if Jules was sexually attractive, but otherwise unacceptable. He did at the moment feel very unacceptable.
1510The only point of reference Jules had found to compare himself too was--
1511'Alberto Montebello aka Vulcan'
1512A thick binder, the edged cracking, near the far corner, labelled neatly in black marker, likely a sharpie. 
1513Jules had some time before David would come for him.
1514He rose, then took the binder from the shelf.
1515Much of the papers were dated over ten years ago, when Vulcan's career was still active. Later dated were the results of attempts to confirm his deceased status. There was a particularly thick section near the middle relating to the events of the Downtown Incident eleven years ago. Unfortunately, many lines were drawn on in a thick sharpie that soaked through to the pages behind it.
1516Jules skimmed through, looking for any information that related to David. Near the beginning of the investigation into the event he appeared to have been of much interest as the closest known associate of the perpetrator, although here too sadly much was covered by sharpie, some sections with apparent force.
1517Alberto Montebello was suspected of illegally immigrating to Mu via the United States of America at a young age somewhere between twenty to twenty five years ago. His place of origin was suspected of being Italy, but this was conjecture based on incomplete birth records and a supposition of his age. The Italian Government was noted as not being particularly interested in aiding Mu's investigation and any possible attempts at deportation.
1518There was quite a large section on the man's powers. As he had seemingly not been born with his powers but obtained them in adulthood, many experiments had been undertaken to see if the effects could be understood at a level that would make attempting to recreate them feasible. The pages ended with a note that further information could be found in another file.
1519Perhaps Jules would read it later, the ability for humans to mutate themselves and the concentration of such happenings in the continent of Mu was indeed fascinating, and if Jules had been left to his original mission would certainly have been an intended field of research.
1520For now he skipped ahead, searching for what he needed. What had drawn David to this apparently violent and chronically troublemaking man?
1521Several short psychological profiles were included but there were also heavily censored, to the point that the paper had become rather damaged. An entire section on his known relationships was now a large black box. 
1522This rampant defiling of important documents was alarming.
1523There was a physical description, and photos.  These Jules had already seen. But now he was more familiar with expressions he could better catalog the components of the man's facial movements. A tight smile with one side higher than the other, but not due to the burn damage, normally meaning a false one. Equally narrowed eyes, normally meaning suspicion. Yet together the meaning became different, especially with the slightly upwards tilt of the head. The overall outcome was, if Jules calculated correctly, self satisfaction, confidence, arrogance, a self perception of superiority: smug. 
1524Was this inner confidence what had attracted David? It was certainly a quality Jules lacked. However, it was also not once he had ever aspired to. The very concept of wanting to be above those around you was anathema to his own society. To think of obtaining the quality was unpleasant to him. But--
1525He thought of Pink Falcon, whose confidence in her persona was her main method of income. Of the King of Mu whose entire line appeared to rule based on proclaiming their superiority over others, and who had several celebrations his own glorification.
1526Human society was so opposite to his own, that it made a strange sort of sense Would it not be symmetrical for the question he did not understand to have an answer he did not understand?
1527Jules was not as far into the binder as he would have liked to have been—much time had been taken attempting to read behind the blackened words—when his phone beeped, indicating the normal end of the work day, which meant David would soon collect him.
1528David had told him, sternly, not to put any of the files back himself, having no confidence in his ability to do so.
1529Perhaps this lack of confidence was an example of how he judged Jules an unsuitable romantic or sexual partner? Briefly, Jules contemplated putting the files back anyways. Surely he would be able to do so. He had a very good memory. The numerical system was not as complicated as David had warned.
1530But no, while it would perhaps show confidence, it would be too impolite.
1531Perhaps Vulcan had been a rude man, but Jules could not imagine David being happy about anyone ignoring his directions so directly.
1532However.
1533Jules: I am finished reading. I will put the files back now.
1534David: NO
1535He was halfway to the shelf with the Vulcan folder in his hand when David slammed open the door.
1536*
1537Jules had been promptly ejected from the office. David was angry at him. Again. At least this time he knew exactly why.
1538A carpet cleaning robot someone had taped a piece of paper with a crude drawing of a face to rolled close then bumped into Jules' shoe. He reached down, turned it the othe way, then let it go. It scuttled away, bumping into several more pieces of furnarue before leaving Jules' sight down the hall.
1539
1540The Prince touched Jules' chin, applying pressure so as to guie his face more upwards. "I could get you in regardless fo wht dear old dad says, if you'd tell me why."
1541"I wish to study the remains of the robot attackers tht have been collected since the start of this year," said Jules immediatly.
1542"Yes." The pressure against his submaxillary triangle increased. "But why do you want to do that?"
1543"The design is familiar to me." He had previously said as much to Frog in his texts. That information was safe.
1544"Familiar? Oh! I see, I see. Well, I can' do much based on that, but perhaps if you tell me a in confidence over, say, dinner at NAME—"
1545"Buit it is impossible to tell you anything in complete confidence," said Jules. "Your father has telepathic abilities.."
1546The Prince's hand jerked back. "Yes, unfortunate, that. Well, simply all the more reason to avoid him." 
1547"But, then again, even if you do not wish to tell me your life story I'm sure I can make some assumtions on why you ,ight have an interest? Are these robots rehaps also from space?"
1548"I do not think they all are," replied Jules, which was not a complete lie.  He attempted to look around the Prince's legs to where the office door were. 
1549"I see." The Prince placed his hands on his hips, blocking Jules' view. "I see it may be important to get you in there after all. It would be good to know of we have more robots from outerspace popping in now wouldn't it?"
1550The Prince,among others, had implid it so many times that Jules could recognise when it was once again occurring. "I am not a robot."
1551"I know one way for me to confirm that." "Perhaps we can come to a nice mutually beheficial arrangement?"
1552"I have signed an agreement with the King that I do not have to undergo a in-depth physical exam unless I present myself to the staff for treatment of an injury."
1553His thumbs hooked into the pockets of his black suit pants. "That's not quite what I meant."
1554The only argument Jules could put forth in his mind against arggeeing were those of forgeign cultural mores. The Prince was still married. And, Jules suspected it would only further damage his changes of obtaining David's interest.
1555However.
1556Nothing he did seem to attract David's interest, and the Prince had many affairs. Such consequences that coul resut weighed lightly when placed against the need to save his comrade. It was, perhaps, a futil;e a p[ath as reading the files had been, but it was once again the only path Jules could surmise.
1557Sill.
1558"Will you allow me access to the labs if I disagree?"
1559"Jules how insulting, I know you are new to our customs but such accusations are beyond the pale."
1560"Thcould we go now?"
1561The Prince was still frowning, perhaps Jules had truly upset him to muc. "Keen to abandon you little paper pusher pal now you have a lead, aren't you?" 
1562"I—" "I will text him. Perhaps he may come with us?"
1563The frown deepened, quickly, but only for a monet, then turned itself backards into a smile. "I'm not one for threesomes."
1564Idk smarm and he keeps batting away the carpet bot whichj irritates jules suconcioudsly. Maybe he has an entourage his own guads etc like dad and they are kick carpetbot
1565"Please do not remove its face."
1566*
1567David's arm itched under his cast. The 'new' program they had to do their year-end budget on was the same as the last except now nothing worked. And Jules had been reading up on his old boyfriend.
1568One of these problems could be solved with a pencil.
1569Ugh, putting shit back with one arm was even more annoying than putting shit back with two. Maybe he should have let Jules help. The guy was smart, he could learn. Probably. David could watch to make sure.
1570Fine. Next time he'd let Jules do it. Under supervision. 
1571Okay, so great, now David had to apologize.
1572Maybe he could buy the dinner tonight. Then find a way to grill Jules not only on space alien shit but why he was looking up dead people. Great. Fun. 
1573David hit up his desk for a quick shot of courage. A terrible mistake. Spotted by one of the many co-workers could couldn't figure out excel spreadsheets yet still held on to their jobs he was forcibly cornered into fixing stupid mistakes at a computer that had a cartoon booby mousepad. And people wondered why David drank on the job.
1574Finally he extracted himself.
1575The hall however, was empty but for a lost cleaning robot that kept bumping it's head into a corner. David pushed it around to the direction way with his foot and checked his phone.
1576Jules: I apologise. Your Prince has said he will allow me access to where the remains of the robots are under study. 
1577Oh no.
1578Jules: There seems to be an issue with his access level.
1579Jules: We are inside now.
1580Jules: Someone is yelling but I have found some of the remains from the attack in TIME.
1581Jules: Seen up close and now with better knowledge of general makes used for destructive purposes it is simple to conclude that these are normal YKT-63 manufactured by Tariki Entities have been modified, most likely by a third party after purchase. While the YKT-63 model is normally quadrupedal, an additional 
1582Jules: A lady wants to confiscate my phone. I cannot take pictures.
1583Jules: I am being removed from the laboratory.
1584Jules: The Prince of Mu is gone.
1585Jules: Please help.
1586How. How had all this managed to happen in the fifteen minutes Jules had been left alone. No, wait. David glanced to the lower corner of his phone. Okay, fourty something minutes. 
1587Wait, more messages chirped into his inbox.
1588DA KING: Good evening, David.
1589DA KING: Getting some interesting updates regarding my son and your space buddy.
1590Fuck.
1591*
1592When David arrived at the gaggle of chairs and vending machines that made up the lab lobby Jules was sitting in a chair, distraught.
1593"They have confiscated my phone, David."
1594Shit. Okay. "Just—" David glanced to the desk where a very stern and smug looking son of a botch stood, a phone that was Jules in an open Tupperware case. Blue. Like those ones your shoes went in at airports. "Go wait at your place, maybe they'll be less standoffish if you're safely out of sight."
1595"I will." God Jules looked Almost as glum as he had the previous night. At least he wasn't jittering this time. "I apologise for causing you trouble."
1596"No it's no problem, grab me something from a vending machine on the way maybe. This blocks' got one with sandwiches somewhere." He waved vaguely down the hall. "Get me a ham something if you can."
1597With Jules safely away from the fight, David took a breath and went to the desk.
1598David tried apologising. "He's very sorry."
1599David tried explaining. "Look he didn't mean anything by it. He was under the mistaken impression it was okay."
1600Bargaining. "You can delete whatever off the phone and he'll never do it again."
1601Diplomacy. "I promise he's not a spy from Russia."
1602"I know he's not," the jerk at the desk said. "He's a space alien and he should be on the tables back there with the rest of them."
1603David had to take a moment at that one.
1604Okay.
1605"First of all." What the fuck had he just said there were dead aliens in the labs? "What the fuck."
1606"Second." What the fuck. No. "Jules isn't a security risk. His phone is probably 90% cat memes. You don't need that."
1607"You don't have the authority to tell me what to do."
1608"Dollars to donuts we're both going to be in deep shit if Jules, who was only in there because the Prince said he could, doesn't get his emotional support phone back." David pointed at the very obviously security camera that stuck out from the ceiling over their head.  "If you know as much as you act like you do then you know that space alien is a favourite of the King and the King fucking loves to meddle."
1609The asshole grimaced. Good. 
1610He crossed his armed and leaned back from the desk. Bad. Fuck. 
1611"You're the form man, aren't you? I'm sure there is a form to handle this request."
1612"Oh come on!" David smacked the desk. With the wrong arm. Fuck. Now it was his turn to grimace. "Look you really want to do it this way?"
1613The motherfucker nodded.
1614"Okay." David turned away from the desk. "Okay."
1615He swivelled. Grabbed the phone.
1616And fucking booted it down the hall.
1617*
1618David was having difficulty breathing when he arrived at Jules' door, but he was, oddly, smiling.
1619"I got it," David said, gasping for air as he braced his uninjured arm against his bent knee. His hair hung over his forehead in damp curls which bounced with each breath. "Fucker couldn't jump the desk fast enough."
1620Jules reached forwards, hoping to take David's weight. "David, are you--?"
1621"I might die." His voice was harsh, breathy and cracking at the end in a way similar to laughter. "But I got the damn phone."
1622The phone? David was in this state because--? "Please do not die!"
1623David pushed past him into the room, then dropped onto the bed. "Oh god I'm getting old." He wiggled for a moment, struggling with his pockets. Then he held Jules' phone, easily identifiable by the flashes of pastel goniochromism in the light. "Here."
1624A strong pressure built in Jules' chest, only increasing, spreading to his face, as he took his precious phone from David's hand. "Thank you."
1625"No problem." David's words were muffled by the pillow in his face. 
1626A quick skim affirmed that nothing obvious had been done to the device. Jules would investigate in depth later but for now—
1627He knelt beside David's head. "David. I am very grateful."
1628David made a muffled noise not unlike one of pain.
1629He did not appear injured, only exhausted. After a moment's watch Jules went to collect a glass of water from the washroom. 
1630He again knelt and offered the cup to David. "Please drink this. I have also stored the sandwiches in the fridge. I obtained ham." 
1631David rolled into a sit then took the cup. "Thanks." He drank, then watched as Jules examined his phone. "They didn't mess it up, did they?"
1632"No, I do not think so." He had not taken any pictures of the interior of the laboratory. Now, angry enough with his treatment to not care for politeness, he regretted that. Even if they had deleted them he could have simply sent copies immediately upon taking them to David and others. The guards would take his phone after he had already been inside, but were not cautious enough to block phone signals from exiting the rooms. They were rude and ineffective.
1633"Good okay." David set the empty glass down onto the floor. His breathing seemed to be almost normal.
1634"Thank you," Jules said again, feeling the sudden urge to re-state the fact.
1635"Jules, it's okay just—" David cut himself off and all the signs of cheer left his face, leaving only the exhaustion. "Promise you won't go near the labs again."
1636"But I only saw a small amount of—"
1637"I'm serious," David cut in. "Those guys are dangerous."
1638That was seeming to be more likely true now, but had not they both managed to leave unharmed? Besides, Jules ad soon so little while he had been there, and from that small amount he knew he needed to see more. "But David, there is important information there."
1639"Look I'll go back. I'll talk to people. But you don't. You stay the hell away from there and anyone who works around there. Actually I should probably…. Fuck." David once again went through his pockets until he produced his own phone.  Then he stared at it for a moment. "That's a lot of messages."
1640Jules placed the cup against the wall beside his phone He knelt. He pulled David forward by the lapels of his coat, then embraced him. "Thank you for everything you have done. Please do not get in trouble for my actions."
1641David's neck was flushed, and hot where Jules' nose touched it. He heard David's voice hum through the skin. "I'm not. Stay away from there."
1642"But I need to find the others."
1643"Yeah, I know." The humming was calming. "The robots are like, your kinda robots or something, yes?"
1644"I am not—" What point was there in hiding such facts from David at this point? David had done nothing but help him find the truth, Jules could give him the truth in exchange. "Yes. I am not a robot. It is much more complicated than that, but yes."
1645"Okay that's great." The muscles of David's neck twitched with breathing. "Yeah, okay."
1646Perhaps Jules should have moved away then, but he did not want to, so he did not. "Is that bad?"
1647David made a strangled noise.
1648Perhaps he had not be precise enough. "Is me being sort of a robot bad?"
1649"No, no that's fine. I don't care about that. I figured that." He breathed deeply again, then pushed Jules back. "Okay. I should shower. You hate when I'm gross on the bed, yes?"
1650He had not thought to mind it until David had mentioned. "Oh, I suppose. Thank you."
1651"And we aren't leaving this room separately, okay?" David said this in such a ways as to indicate it was not really a question.
1652David felt his face frown involuntarily. He corrected it into neutrality. Hopefully something serious looking, perhaps stern. "The King of Mu has guaranteed my safety."
1653"Yeah, he has, but—" David began the complex maneuvering required to removed his jacket. "You got a plastic bag anywhere for my arm?"
1654Jules did of course. He has begun collecting them once David had first been injured. They had their own box.
1655"Thanks," David said when Jules duly handed him one. "Even with the King on your side, you can't be too careful, okay? Sometimes people decide they know better than their own boss." 
1656Then David deposited his firearm on Jules' bed in an alarmingly careless manner before stumbling into the washroom.
1657Jules placed the weapon onto the top of his sturdiest box then mused on the complexities of Human hierarchies as he checked through his phone and waited for David to finish his washing. He texted Frog, and Falcon X, inquiring on the Laboratory staff. 
1658Frog 8:40:22 PM
1659David is right (?!)
1660Frog 8:40:22 PM
1661Stay away from labs
1662TheFalconX: As I have told you previously, that particular department of the Justice HQ is not one you want the attentions of. They are involved in shady operations and I doubt they are happy at your continued existence. I have had my own dealings with them and can tell you with certainty that they are not to be trusted. Stay far away from them.
1663Pink Falcon soon sent him a similarly opinionated text, as did Little Pink. Falcon X had likely alerted them.
1664Sentiment was unanimous, but Jules did not want to comply.
1665David had said he would continue the investigation on Jules' behalf. In order for David to be able to properly do that, Jules would have to tell him what to look for, which would mean informing him not only of Jules' species' nature, but perhaps even his suspicions concerning the robot that he knew. 
1666It was not that David felt unworthy of trust. He was confusing, but had never acted towards Jules with malice and repeatedly gone out of his way for Jules to an extent no one else had. However, David had previously existing loyalties that Jules could not ask him to override. David would go against the laboratory staff for him, but what of other departments? Despite what David had said, all in Mu seemed loyal to their King.
1667The King had been kind to Jules.
1668At first Jules had been very disappointed to learn that the King of Mu's telepathic ability was incompatible with Jules' mind. It had sounded like the closest method of communication to the one the majority of information was transmitted. But, the scope of the King's ability, once researched, appeared quite invasive. It was likely for the best Jules was only able to communicate with him verbally.
1669At least he had attempted to convince himself of such.
1670However, from his research it seemed that the King of Mu did not have any difficulties with any Human minds. Thus, anything a Human knew, the King could learn simply by being in close proximity to them.
1671Therefore…
1672The door to the washroom's lock unclicked, and it opened, slightly. "I uh, forgot to grab clothes first, could you pass me something? Something not too fuzzy, maybe."
1673Jules duly picked out one of his more bland pairs of flannel pajama sets. A simple traditional shirt and pants combination in gray and green, then he passed it through the crack of the door's opening. It was possible that the colours would contrast with David's hair to a flattering aesthetic effect. The sleeves were also quite wide and stretchable, which would hopefully fit David's cast.
1674"Thanks."
1675"It is no problem," Jules said to the closed door.
1676The Shopping Channel was in the middle of switching programs when David exited. The pajamas did indeed cause his own natural colours to be enhanced pleasantly.
1677"So." David sat on the far edge of the bed, picking at here his sleeved bunched up over his cast. "Robot, huh?"
1678The arm sling had been discarded with the suit jacket on the floor, which was closer to Jules. He picked it up and handed it to David. "I am not a robot. The correct term in English would be cyborg."
1679"So you're part robot."
1680"Yes, that is what the term means, I thought?"
1681David shrugged, looking past Jules to the television. "Yeah, I guess so. That's not so weird you know. Los of people have robot bits nowadays." 
1682"It is not quite the same as what has been implemented in Earth society." Jules had done extensive research on this topic. While advanced in many ways, the difference was still incomparable. "Please come closer and I will show you."
1683The muscles between David's eyebrows contracted. "Wait, what do you mean show—"
1684Jules extended his closer arm then retracted his skin. It had been only a few weeks since he had last done so, yet the process was already so much more difficult. His integration systems were advancing father than estimated. He was still able to extract the flesh-substitute to a depth that showed the artificial enhancements that were a part of his skeleton, although they too had sunk further into humanoid bone.
1685"Oh," said David. "Okay."
1686The reaction was far more subdued than Jules had predicted. Yet still it was concerning. As far was he had seen, humans tended to be repelled by seeing the interiors of animal life similar to their own. Thus while this would not cause Jules any harm it was likely disturbing. "The biological and mechanical components are in the process of melding into one to create a more humanoid form, although I will never have completely Human biology."
1687David stared at the open slice of arm, saying nothing. 
1688"Does this bother you?" asked Jules.
1689"No." David's voice was squeaky, as if his vocal cords were too tight. 
1690Jules relaxed the retracted flesh-substitute and let his arm drop. "I apologize, I only wished to assure you I am not actually a robot and attempt a proper explanation."
1691"No!" David repeated, mush louder and faster this time, but still abnormally high pitched. He looked briefly into Jules' eyes and oddly his face flushed red. "It's fine! Very interesting."
1692"I see, that is good then." Jules still let his arm regain its default status. "The integration system has gotten farther in its work than I had anticipated, causing my internal structure to look more similar to your own. I am glad that does not upset you."
1693David hummed. Nodded. Glanced away then back very quickly. "So, you guys aren't normally human-people looking?"
1694"No," said Jules. "Through the use of technology my landing pod was able to sample available Human DNA, then use it to begin the process of recreating a Humanoid form."
1695David again would not look at him, instead it was the Shopping Channel program that seemed to hold his attention. It was difficult to tell with the distance between them, but his temperature seemed to have increased, as evidenced by his continued flushing. 
1696"That sounds complicated. How did it make sure it didn't pick up like, a dog's DNA instead?"
1697"I am not sure."
1698"Oh."
1699Perhaps it was prudent to quickly reach the important information that David would need in order to help Jules' research. "However, the typical form my species takes does look far more robotic than how you see me now, especially due to the metallic exoskeleton. I have noted similarities between that form and those of the robots in the previous three encounters." 
1700"All right, okay. So your species is usually more roboty and--" David's gaze slid past the television, up to the wall where the photos Jules had collected were taped to the wall. Up, to the ceiling where the photographs became less exotic, and more insectoid. "Huh, suddenly some shit makes way more sense."
1701If that was a positive or negative statement Jules had no idea. His biological insides, likely already displeased at his interference, twisted unpleasantly. "Does this bother you?"
1702"What?"
1703"Does my true nature disturb you?"
1704"No!" David still did not look at Jules' face, but instead his arm. "It's no problem. Kinda strange to try and imagine how the hell it works, but no, it's fine. So you were like, born—"
1705"My species is not born," interrupted Jules.  He had said too much all ready, that was clear, but now he could not stop. "We are created in batches for predetermined purpose at creation centers. Although a concept similar to the dual sex reproduction similar on Earth does exist as well, that is only so for lower lifeforms. Even before the integration of technology into our making was implemented, the combination of genetic information was restricted to a specific physical castes, somewhat similar to what you may have heard called Parthenogenesis."
1706David stared at him as he trailed off. "I have not actually heard of that one but I'm betting it's on Wikipedia." 
1707"I suppose," Jules conceded. 
1708David suddenly bent over, fumbling his phone out of his jacket's pocket. "Wait uh, so does that mean. You know."
1709Jules said nothing so that David could continue.
1710"You can't uh. Reproduce. Sexually?" Which of David's sentence fragments wee meant as questions, Jules was not sure. Possibly all of them. At least most of them.
1711Which was, despite David's apparent thought otherwise, not a question Jules had considered David wanting the answer to. "I do not believe so. Although so impossible as to not be an idea contemplated at home, with the mysteries of the integration technology, I suppose it could be possible, but I would consider such an act treason?" Somehow he was unsure now if his own words were questions or not.
1712"Possible?" David repeated back at him.
1713"As such I have considered any attempt at sexual relations with a female Human would be ill advised. Just in case." Again it seemed like Jules had gravely miscalculated. Instead of being upset at the sight of gore, David was instead far more agitated at Jules' unknown reproductive capabilities. "The attempts to control your species fertility seem capricious." 
1714"So." David said one syllable then paused.  "Wait. Give me a moment."
1715Jules waited until the presenter on the television switched from explaining the estimated monetary value of a ring to showcasing a bracelet meant to be purchased alongside it.
1716"Okay," David said. He had not actually looked up anything on his phone. From what Jules could see he only had open a messaging service. "So you used to be a cyborg bug but your robots bits made a human body and now you are a cyborg human and can…"
1717"Mostly." Suddenly, Jules had an idea. It had already worked once. "If you are confused I can show you again and try to explain more clearly. I am able to retract the flesh material from areas other than my limbs if necessary. If you are concerned about my reproductive capa--" 
1718"Maybe I should have my shower!" exclaimed David.
1719"You had a shower," replied Jules.
1720"Right," said David. "I mean your shower. You should have yours."
1721David was not wrong, but the attempt to change the subject seemed deliberately abrupt. David, Jules was forced to conclude, was indeed disturbed by the truth of Jules' form. "I suppose."
1722He gathered his sleeping clothes as David said nothing more. The television's programing switched to a new topic. 
1723"Please eat one of the sandwiches," Jules said before locking himself in the washroom.