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1At the 2003 Survivor Series, the show ended with Brock Lesnar holding one WWE world title and Bill Goldberg held the other.
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3I suppose at the time, it was conceivable to think that in 2020, a PPV would end with Lesnar holding a world title. Goldberg? Not a chance.
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5And until about a week ago, there really wasn’t much of a chance.
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7As mentioned last week, here is the reality of the situation. WrestleMania is coming and to the average person, what match means more as the main event, Bray Wyatt vs. Roman Reigns for the Universal title, or Goldberg vs. Reigns? Granted, it doesn’t mean who goes last, but in the plans on paper as of the Raw taping on 2/17, Wyatt vs. Reigns for the title was the main event.
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9But the answer to the question, as sad as this sounds, is that Goldberg vs. Reigns garners far more interest, even in 2020. Of course the mentality to go with stars of the past and not make stars of the present is the case history of one of the main things that killed WCW. But that’s for the rest of the year. WrestleMania is where you go with the matches people most want to see. So there it was.
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11While it was reality, it also meant Vince McMahon had to come to a sad but telling admission. In Wyatt’s Fiend character, he had not, perhaps since the introduction of Kane in 1997, and perhaps even before that, allowed a heel character to look so dominant. Wyatt’s Fiend character was creative and fresh. He had become the top merchandise seller. He got up from everyone’s big moves and destroyed top babyfaces. The Fiend was cool, like the Undertaker, but he was destroying babyfaces. Seth Rollins had to turn heel because nobody wants a top babyface who cowers from the heel. The Miz had to turn heel because nobody wants a babyface whose family is threatened, vows revenge, and gets destroyed like he was made of silly putty. Daniel Bryan didn’t turn heel, but he is now setting up a program with Drew Gulak while it’s WrestleMania season, and this was after somehow being the only one who could figure out how to make a match with The Fiend work. Luckily for Braun Strowman, who he destroyed in an angle, they moved him away from The Fiend before he reached the point of no return as a face.
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13Since day one of Smackdown on FOX, the main storyline was The Fiend destroys everyone, no exceptions, and Roman Reigns is kept away from him in a long feud with King Corbin. This would lead to their first meeting at WrestleMania, the monster heel, even if he is cheered, against the badass face. It’s the formula that almost always works.
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15Except the change in the card shows in Vince McMahon’s eyes, it didn’t. It’s quite an admission, that a WCW creation of 1998, now, 22 years later, can walk off the couch and be a bigger star than the guy who has been pushed as untouchable weekly on television. But that admission is true. For an endless number of reasons, WWE has trouble making stars, even when they have them. Even with the bigger audience and platform, the WWE method of making stars can’t match 22 year old nostalgia. It’s not the first time. WCW couldn’t make stars after 1999 who could get over like Hulk Hogan, Sting, or Ric Flair, who were all past their primes. But yet, those same people who couldn’t be stars, ended up doing well years later. Today, people who weren’t seen as stars in WWE who could carry the brand, Cody, Chris Jericho and Jon Moxley, are carrying the rival brand and getting reactions far bigger than anyone in WWE. One of the great lessons of the value of WWE television was many years ago from Jericho. During one of his comebacks, he had the idea that he wanted to work a house show schedule, but refused to work any television. At almost every house show, the guy with no television was over more than the main eventers on televison weekly. Granted, the same could be said for Bruno Sammartino after 1977 and until the end of his career, that he was more over at the arenas but was never on television, but, he was Bruno Sammartino, not Chris Jericho.
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17Indeed, the very idea of Goldberg was to be the reincarnation of Sammartino from late 1977 until he retired in late 1980. That’s why him being added to the list of babyfaces destroyed by The Fiend, which was absolutely the plan, seemed foolish.
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19Goldberg beat The Fiend, breaking the mandible claw twice and pinning him with a jackhammer that really wasn’t one, in 2:57 on a night in Saudi Arabia where the theme seemed to be current guys squashed by part-time legends in seconds, a largely heatless crowd, and lackluster matches.
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21Undertaker won the Tuwaig Mountain Trophy doing one match where he pinned A.J. Styles with one move in 20 seconds. Hopefully they have a great follow-up idea, because after this encounter, a fan would have less interest in a rematch at WrestleMania than a third Tyson Fury-Deontay Wilder fight.
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23Lesnar retained the WWE title over Ricochet in 1:28 in a match where Ricochet got no offensive move in. Obviously there was no chance for Ricochet to win, but he could have lost and still have the match worked in a way that he could have benefitted from it. This was the opposite. He’s now fully established as a guy not worthy of investing in or paying attention to.
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25Why you had three matches like that on the same show is an unanswerable question. Undertaker-Styles killed interest in that match. Lesnar-Ricochet didn’t have to be like that. Goldberg-Wyatt shouldn’t have gone last and ended the show the way it did, but going any longer or different was a risk not worth taking. Even with Goldberg being the most popular wrestler on the show to an audience consisting of mostly children in Saudi Arabia who not only weren’t born in 1998 to see Goldberg’s big year, but weren’t even born in 2003 when WWE botched him in an attempt to remake the simple formula that worked.
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27Goldberg did nothing but four spears and the jackhammer. At 53, he looked amazing for his age to be sure physically, but there was a difference between this Goldberg and the guy who wrestled Dolph Ziggler months back and even more, the guy who came back against Lesnar a few years back. You can’t fight age, although he’s done a pretty decent job of it. Perhaps he was battling an injury, or wasn’t given enough lead time to get his body in cosmetic shape or this match. But whether it’s Hogan, Flair and Sting in 1999 or Bruiser, Crusher, Mad Dog, Baron, The Blackjacks and Verne coming out of retirement one too many times in 1985, this is a lesson in history that Vince McMahon evidently never learned.
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29And the irony is that McMahon’s M.O. was to give up on people at 40. Now it’s to give up on people at 28 and build back shows around guys in their 40s and 50s. There’s only one way this can end. The lone saving grace is that WWE is financially idiot-proof, which is a luxury Verne Gagne, Eric Bischoff and everyone else who only thought about today with the stars of yesterday and having no vision for tomorrow didn’t have.
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31A 16-match WrestleMania card was supposedly finalized more than a week back. Until it wasn’t.
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33Sometime after 2/18 or 2/19, with the first word breaking early on 2/21, Vince McMahon made the call to revamp and scrap most of the Smackdown side of the WrestleMania show. The key call was that Goldberg vs. Reigns was the direction, with Goldberg getting the title. Wyatt would be freed to face John Cena, likely with the idea Wyatt would win, eventually go to the Reigns program as planned, and he’d regain the mystique that he lost to a degree here, and only to a degree. The Saudi Arabia show aired on a Thursday afternoon in the U.S., so people seeing it was actually minuscule compared to most PPV and TV shows.
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35Perhaps because of Undertaker, Goldberg and Lesnar winning, actual interest was up. The show did 200,000 searches on Google, the fourth most for the day, a level that Saudi Arabia shows in the past have not done, and the normal level for most Sunday PPV shows.
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37After the changes, this is a skeleton Mania lineup:
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39*Goldberg vs. Reigns for the Universal title. In theory, Reigns gets his title shot winning the Elimination Chamber match on 3/8 in Philadelphia
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41*Lesnar vs. Drew McIntyre for the WWE title
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43*Cena vs. Wyatt
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45*Edge vs. Orton - Stipulations to be named later
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47*Undertaker vs. Styles - Still happening
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49*Becky Lynch vs. Shayna Baszler for the Raw women’s title, in theory based on Baszler winning a Chamber match on 3/8
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51*Rhea Ripley vs. Charlotte Flair for the NXT women’s title
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53*Kabuki Warriors vs. Natalya & Beth Phoenix for the women’s tag team titles. It is likely the Phoenix return on Raw on 3/2 in Brooklyn to report on Edge’s condition leads to an angle that starts the build for this one. One would think this match can’t be announced until 3/9 or later since both Asuka and Natalya are in the women’s Elimination Chamber match. The two were paired off with each other during the contract signing angle for the Chamber
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55*Otis vs. Dolph Ziggler. This will be Mandy Rose related in some form
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57*Two Battle Royals, one for the men, one for the women, to get everyone on the show, and for women to bring back people from the past for a nostalgia pop and get some NXT talent that may not be on Takeover to be part of a big show
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59There will be five other matches.
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61One match will involve Seth Rollins. It could be a singles match with Kevin Owens, and as of ten days ago, that was the plan. It could be Rollins & Murphy defending the tag titles, with Owens and a partner (Samoa Joe’s suspension will be up on 3/24, but that would mean no angles could be done until after that date, and it would be hard to figure Joe in, because with two concussions in a short period of time, you really can’t make plans involving WrestleMania for him this week), or multiple tag teams.
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63There will be a Smackdown women’s title match. It appears that Bayley will defend against the winner of a third Elimination Chamber match in Philadelphia with Smackdown women. That hasn’t been announced and is not official, but given that on Friday, Lacey Evans did an interview about entering an Elimination Chamber match to get another title shot, and then on Monday, she was not involved in the contract signing for the women’s match featuring only Raw competitors, that would seemingly lead to a third. Bayley vs. Naomi was at one point planned for the show, but they just did that match in Saudi Arabia.
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65There will be an IC title match with Braun Strowman. Given Strowman pinned Shinsuke Nakamura on television, one would think he’s not in it. It could be multiple people. Sheamus is getting monster push for something so he could be in it. But that’s only speculation.
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67There will be some form of a Smackdown tag team title match. This could be a Miz & John Morrison rematch with New Day, or could involve other teams. One idea was King Corbin & Robert Roode, since Ziggler is with Otis. That was described to us as possible.
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69The U.S. title, currently held by Andrade, is the other match that at least was at one point on the books, perhaps a multiple person match as well.
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71While nothing has been said, rumors have come up in the past week of the idea of a Tyson Fury match. WWE pushed Fury’s win over Deontay Wilder hard on Raw. Strowman teased the idea, but we’ve seen that and there was nothing about it that would make you want to see it again. Paul Levesque and Stephanie McMahon were at the fight, but that means nothing because they routinely attend major Las Vegas boxing matches. There has been talk of Fury on the show, but nothing serious could be planned because of the risk of injury in the Wilder fight. But he got out of it unscathed. The big question is money. Fury, with the win, is in a much higher income bracket than a few months ago. In no way would Fury be worth millions for one show given what he would mean as far as WWE Network subscribers. And no way he’s working for less than millions. But he could be a key component if they are trying to sell WrestleMania to an outside service, as Fury’s name means a ton in the sports world and the fighting world right now, although not as much as if his PPV had done a bigger number. Given that every significant star is figured in, the only names I could see as an opponent if a deal is made, would be either Big Show, with the size gimmick and he can lose with no issue, or HHH, who one would think would also have to lose.
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73Super Showdown 2020 on 2/27 at the Mohammed Abdu Arena on the Boulevard in Riyadh, South Africa would rank as a newsworthy, but very lackluster show.
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75It was a huge spectacle, with more pyro than a July 4th stadium event in the U.S., making WrestleMania look like an ROH house show in that regard.
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77The four third generation stars told a story over the week. On 2/19,they defeated the Suzuki-gun team of Minoru Suzuki & Taichi & Desperado & Yoshinobu Kanemaru. The next day, they teamed with Tiger Mask to beat the LIJ team of Tetsuya Naito & Sanada & Bushi & Evil & Hiromu Takahashi. In his next to last match, the third generation quartet beat Bullet Club of Jay White & Bad Luck Fale & Gedo & Jado.
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8512. Dan Hooker (20-8) beat Paul Felder (17-5) via split decision on scores of 47-48, 48-47 and 48-47 in a lightweight fight. The fans were into Hooker and this fight. Hooker was landing leg kicks early in the first and started landing the jab. Felder was landing some good punches but took some good damage and his eye was swollen shut after the first. The first round was pretty close. Felder turned up the volume in the second and landed more punches, and landed some real hard shots. Hooker did land some good shots and got the back standing at one point but it was Felder's round. Hooker turned up the volume himself in the third round and was doing some damage with the jab. Both were landing hard leg kicks at times. Hooker landed a lot in the latter stages in the round and took the round. Felder came out on the offensive in the fourth and was landing hard leg kicks and some power punches. Felder rocked Hooker several times and it looked like this was the round where Hooker's jaw broke. Hooker was trying for takedowns but Felder defended them and landed hard punches and elbows after they broke each time. It was tied going into the last round. Both mens' faces were a mess at the start of the last round. Felder landed some kicks and punches early and was landing more until Hooker started pressuring with the jab and got a takedown. Hooker was holding Felder down but Felder was throwing back elbows as Hooker had his back as the fight ended. The fifth was real close and this was a fight that really could have gone either way. As noted, I had it 48-47 for Felder but either man getting the win would have been justified. They were both a mess after the fight. This fight is worth going out of your way to see and ended the show on a high note.
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87Both AEW and NXT declined from the prior week on 2/26.
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89In the case of AEW, that wasn’t a big surprise since the Atlanta show was a bigger show and the Cody-Wardlow cage match had been built up for weeks, while the AEW big match, Kenny Omega vs. Pac, was an Iron Man match which traditionally doesn’t do well in ratings since people know the actual finish isn’t coming for 30 minutes as opposed to not knowing when the finish is coming.
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91NXT was not only coming off a Takeover show, but had heavily promoted Charlotte Flair vs. Bianca Belair. We don’t have quarters at press time so we really can’t say what did and didn’t work or why.
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93AEW did 865,000 viewers and a 0.30 in 18-49, a drop of 3.6 percent in total viewers and 3.2 percent in 18-49. Last week’s show went against the Democratic debate that did huge numbers, but clearly the interest in both shows were down, even with AEW coming off a string of great shows.
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95NXT did 717,000 viewers and a 0.23 in 18-49, a drop of 9.7 percent overall and 8.0 percent in 18-49.
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97In addition, AEW had a one hour Countdown special at 10 p.m. which did 383,000 viewers and a 0.14 in 18-49.
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99Miz & Mrs. went pretty much head-to-head, from 10:05 p.m. to 10:37 p.m., doing 394,000 viewers and a 0.13 in 18-49. For Miz & Mrs., likely due to the AEW competition, they were down 21.2 percent from last week overall and 23.5 percent in 18-49.
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101The key questions for last week are how the quarters did, particularly AEW’s Iron Man match, as well as Q8, with the Chris Jericho-Jon Moxley weigh-in going against Flair vs. Belair. Jericho has not lost a quarter hour since AEW started but WWE was sending one of its most pushed wrestlers in a storyline program in competition. The other key is when AEW ended, did AEW putting on a Countdown show against the last five minutes hurt the usual migration at 10 p.m. of AEW viewers to NXT.
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103In addition, not that it matters that much, head-to-head, AEW’s show likely beat Miz & Mrs. The latter was promoted very hard on Raw, on USA and during NXT. The former had no promotion past mentions on Dynamite the night of the show, and one mention in passing that most fans missed the week before. The numbers look to be close but because the AEW show was one hour and likely faded as the show went on, while Miz & Mrs. was 32 minutes, it’s not clear which show did better in the actual head-to-head.
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105AEW was ninth in 18-49, trailing four news shows that it usually beats, but those news shows did far better than usual overall, as well as two NBA games on ESPN, Black Ink Crew 8B on VH-1 and Real Housewives of New Jersey on Bravo. NXT was No. 17 in that demo, which is better than it usually does, even doing a below average rating.
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107The ESPN NBA game head-to-head with both shows did 940,000 viewers and a 0.41 in 18-49.
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109AEW in particular declined with men from last week. In the 18-49 demo, AEW was down 10.6 percent with men and up 14.8 percent with women. It also was AEW’s lowest numbers ever with teenagers. But for the first time, AEW beat NXT in over 50, because that was the age group that NXT lost this week. So while the audience is pretty stable, it was increasing with women, decreasing in men, and getting older.
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111The show did a 0.06 in 12-17 (down 50.0 percent), 0.21 in 18-34 (up 16.7 percent), 0.39 in 35-49 (down 11.4 percent) and 0.36 in 50+ (down 5.3 percent).
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113The audience was 65.6 percent male in 18-49 and 64.2 percent male in 12-17.
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115On the flip side, NXT was up with men, but down with women, and the only demo it beat AEW in was teenagers, but both shows did pretty much record lows there.
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117The show did a 0.07 in 12-17 (down 50.0 percent), 0.13 in 18-34 (down 31.6 percent), 0.33 in 35-49 (up 6.5 percent) and 0.34 in 50+ (down 10.5 percent).
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119The audience was 70.2 percent male in 18-49 and 69.8 percent male in 12-17.
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121So in 18-49, Men were up 0.9 percent from last week, but women were down 23.8 percent.
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123Ratings for the 2/25 WWE Backstage show aren’t available as the show didn’t rank among the top 150 first run shows in 18-49.
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125The good news for the 2/24 Raw is that the first-to-third hour drop, which was near record levels last week, was far lower than usual. The problem was it was more due to how weak the first hour was.
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127The 2,246,000 viewers in the first hour was the lowest in history for a non-holiday show that didn’t go against major sports competition.
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129The overall average of 2,210,000 (1.41 viewers per home, well above usual) would be the second lowest to the 2,168,000 on figure on 2/3 when it comes to a Raw that didn’t go against major sports coverage.
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131The first hour did 2,246,000 viewers. The second hour actually grew to 2,278,000 viewers while the third hour fell to 2,106,000 viewers. It was only the second time this year where hour two beat hour one. In particular, there was strong first-to-third hour growth in every female demo from 12 to 49, particularly teenage girls grew strongly in hour three.
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133Raw won the 18-49 demo with a 0.71 average on cable, and beat reruns on CBS and the second hour on FOX (also reruns) in that demo. The show finished in eighth place overall. The 913,000 viewers in 18-49 was down 11 percent from last week, with men down 12 percent, and 18-49 was down 31 percent from the same week last year, but for obvious reasons that’s an unfair comparison.
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135It was down in total viewers 9.3 percent from last week’s strong showing. It was down 24.4 percent from the same show one year earlier, but that was the show where Roman Reigns returned with them heavily publicizing he would give a cancer update after they held off the news so it would maximize ratings, plus they had Ric Flair’s 70th birthday part on the show last year.
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137The first quarter did 2,329,000 viewers which was the Randy Orton and Kevin Owens talking segment to build up their main event. Angel Garza vs. Humberto Carrillo lost 127,000 viewers. Ricochet vs. Luke Gallows lost 56,000 viewers. The Paul Heyman & Brock Lesnar promo was the high point of the show at 2,350,000 viewers, an increase of 204,000. Aleister Black vs Erick Rowan lost 15,000 viewers. The Drew McIntyre promo lost 55,000 viewers. The R-Truth vs. Bobby Lashley segment lost 132,000 viewers. The women’s Chamber contract signing gained 129,000 viewers. Angelo Dawkins vs. Murphy lost 205,000 viewers. Seth Rollins vs. Montez Ford lost 120,000 viewers to 1,952,000, the low point of the show. And the Owens vs. Orton main event and post-match gained 173,000 viewers to 2,125,000.
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139The first-to-third hour movement was different from usual, based on very low numbers for teenage girls in the first two hours and strong growth in hour three. Women 18-49 grew from a 0.48 to 0.52 from hour one-to-three, while men fell 0.94 to 0.85.
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141The show did a 0.36 in 12-17 (down 28.0 percent from last week), 0.47 in 18-34 (down 24.2 percent), 0.95 in 35-49 (down 1.0 percent) and 1.02 in 50+ (down 5.6 percent).
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143The audience was 63.8 percent male in 18-49 and 71.2 percent male in 12-17.
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145Bellator on 2/22 in a taped show from Dublin, Ireland did 310,000 viewers with Brent Primus over Chris Bungard as the television main event. The number is fine given it went head-to-head with the Tyson Fury-Deontay Wilder fight.
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147Smackdown on 2/21 did a 1.55 rating and 2,484,000 viewers (1.33 viewers per home) and an 0.7 in the 18-49 demo for a show built around Bill Goldberg being there live and the Bella Twins Hall of Fame announcement. The number was virtually identical with the 2,464,000 and 0.7 numbers last week and the rating was up 1.3 percent.
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149Smackdown was the highest rated show on television in 18-49, beating a number of 0.6s for CBS shows. There were also two 0.6s on cable, although an 0.58 for Gold Rush on cable is equivalent to an 0.82 in the available homes.
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151As far as overall on the networks, Smackdown did beat “Fresh off the Boat” on ABC (2,387,000 viewers) but lost to everything else.
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153Last year on the same week on Friday, FOX in those two hours averaged an 0.6 in 18-49 and 3,348,000 in viewers. That was with first-run programming so this was the first time this year that FOX’s first-run of the same week drew a lower 18-49 number than this year.
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155As far as the quarters, based on the major markets, the high point was the first segment with the Usos, New Day, Dolph Ziggler & Robert Roode and The Miz & John Morrison and the beginning of the eight man tag. The match itself lost 9.1 percent of viewers. The quarter with Tucker with Mandy Rose & Sonya Deville, Renee Young interviewing Evans and the intros for the Symphony of Destruction match gained 4.7 percent. The Braun Strowman & Elias vs. Shinsuke Nakamura & Cesaro symphony of destruction match lost 5.1 percent. The Corbin interview and Alexa Bliss with the Bella Twins gained 8.8 percent so they were big movers. Daniel Bryan vs. Heath Slater and the Otis, Mandy Rose and Dolph Ziggler segment lost 3.7 percent. Carmella vs. Naomi lost 5.2 percent. And the closing angle with Bill Goldberg and Bray Wyatt gained 4.8 percent, which is fine but not out of the ordinary for the last segment. For whatever this is worth, comparing the Goldberg segment with the Bellas in total viewers, Goldberg won in New York, Los Angeles, Chicago, Philadelphia was tied, Bellas won huge in Dallas, Goldberg won in San Francisco, Bellas won in DC, Goldberg won in Houston and Bellas won huge in Atlanta.
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157Bellator on 2/21 head-to-head did 296,000 viewers for a show from Thackerville, OK headlined by Yaroslov Amasov over Ed Ruth. That’s actually above what a show like that would be expected to do at this stage.
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159Combate Americas on 2/21 drew what was undoubtedly its largest total audience to date on 2/21 for a show from Mexicali featuring Rafa Garcia defending their lightweight title over Humberto Bandenay. The show drew 511,000 on Univision, a great number considering the show started at midnight on Friday night. Of that, 274,000 were in the 18-49 demo. The 18-49 number was the second best they’ve done on Univision. Those numbers don’t include English language viewership on AXS TV. The key is that on Univision, the median viewer age was 27, which is 15 years younger than AEW or UFC, 23 years younger than Raw or Smackdown and 28 years younger than NXT. That figure would be the youngest of any major sports company that I’m aware of, and the fact it’s on a Friday at midnight makes that even more impressive.
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161Some more ratings notes on the 2/19 AEW and NXT shows. The numbers live were 893,000 (1.35 viewers per home) to 794,000, although head-to-head that was 788,000.
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163AEW had 402,000 viewers in 18-49, lower than usual. NXT had 324,000 overall and 322,000 head-to-head.
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165The first quarter had AEW with a Battle Royal, which did 882,000 total viewers and 402,000 in 18-49. NXT had an Undisputed Era interview and the beginning of Jordan Devlin vs. Lio Rush for the cruiserweight title, which did 799,000 viewers with 310,000 in 18-49.
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167The second quarter saw AEW continue the Battle Royal plus the beginning of Shanna vs. Kris Statlander, which lost 18,000 viewers and 7,000 in 18-49. NXT had the rest of Devlin vs. Rush, which lost 31,000 viewers and 10,000 in 18-49.
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169The third quarter saw AEW continue Shanna vs. Statlander and have a Nyla Rose interview. That lost 69,000 viewers and 48,000 in 18-49. NXT had a Tommaso Ciampa interview plus some stuff with Austin Theory and gained 59,000 viewers and 44,000 in 18-49. This was the only quarter NXT won, winning with total viewers 827,000 to 795,000 and with 18-49, by a 354,000 to 347,000 margin.
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171The fourth quarter saw things reverse. Jon Moxley vs. Jeff Cobb for AEW gained 177,000 viewers and gained 78,000 in 18-49. NXT had a Finn Balor promo and Zack Gibson & James Drake vs. Raul Mendoza & Joaquin Wilde and lost 55,000 viewers and lost 36,000 in 18-49.
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173The fifth quarter, built around the post-match beating of Moxley, saw AEW gain 1,000 viewers overall (which was its peak head-to-head overall audience at 937,000 and 441,000 in 18-49) and gain 16,000 in 18-49. NXT had Matt Riddle & Pete Dunne vs. Oney Lorcan & Danny Burch, and they gained 61,000 viewers overall, which was also the peak audience of 833,000, but their peak 18-49 audience was quarter three. They also gained 17,000 in 18-49.
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175The sixth quarter saw AEW have the Kenny Omega & Adam Page vs. Pentagon Jr. & Rey Fenix match, which lost 75,000 viewers and 27,000 in 18-49. NXT had Keith Lee’s interview, quick match with Kona Reeves and post-match with Dominik Dijakovic, which lost 56,000 viewers and 25,000 in 18-49.
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177The seventh quarter, which for AEW was basically building next week’s show, videos building the cage match story, lost 83,000 viewers and 40,000 in 18-49. NXT had Chelsea Green vs. Kayden Carter along with a Bianca Belair run-in during the middle of that match, and gained 7,000 viewers and 6,000 in 18-49. The key is that except for quarter three, this was as close as it got with AEW having an 815,000 to 784,000 lead.
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179The final quarter, the head-to-head main events, was a big win as expected for AEW. Cody vs. Wardlow in a cage gained 132,000 viewers to 947,000, and gained 46,000 in 18-49 to 420,000. So the key is while it did gain in 18-49, the big gains were older and younger, and likely more older. So the cage was a big hit for the over 50 crowd, which is the one demo AEW has been losing and where for the first time they equaled NXT in. NXT, with Velveteen Dream vs. Roderick Strong, pushed in commercial after commercial on Raw, lost 40,000 overall to 744,000, and 6,000 in 18-49 to 310,000.
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181The cage match gains were 107,000 men and 25,000 women. But as far as actual viewers, less than half of the male gains came directly from NXT and almost all the female gains came from people watching other television shows.
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183The last five minute overrun saw a huge turnover of 196,000 viewers overall going to NXT and 71,000 of them in 18-49. Given the shift of the previous quarter, what it looks like what happened was that a ton of regular NXT viewers switched over to the cage match.
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185Whether that’s a good sign for the 3/4 show when NXT does Dakota Kai vs. Tegan Nox in a cage is interesting. Because the shift to AEW was largely over 50, and the shift back when the show ended, was also over 50, which is the dominant NXT audience.
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187This is the third and final issue of the current set. With last week being a double issue, If you’ve got a (1) on your address label, your subscription expires with this week’s issue.
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189Renewal rates for the printed Observer in the United States are $13.50 for four issues (which includes $4 for postage and handling), $25 for eight, $35.50 for 12, $46 for 16, $69 for 24, $92 for 32, $115 for 40, $149.50 for 52 up through $184 for 64 issues.
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191For Canada and Mexico, the rates are $15 for four issues (which includes $6 for postage and handling), $27 for eight, $38.50 for 12, $50 for 16, $75 or 24, $100 for 32, $125 for 40 issues, $162.50 for 52 and $200 for 64.
192
193For the rest of the world, the rates are $17 for four issues (which includes $9 for postage and handling), $33 for eight, $47.50 for 12, $62 for 16, $77.50 for 20, $93 for 24, $108.50 for 28, $155 for 40 issues and $201.50 for 52 issues.
194~~~~~~~
195
196"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: rec.arts.startrek.current
197"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com". HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
1986/20/96 by smtp.bl...@dns.bluesky.net
199"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: alt.buddha.short.fat.guy
200heavensgate.com wrote: [snip] >>> www.heavensgate.com > Tina: > > Pete summed it up pretty well: >> Bwahahahahaha! > > But Hey, I was tempted, ...
2016/21/96 by Ned
202OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: misc.survivalism
203OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. "heavens" wrote: > HEAVEN'S GATE >- How and When the door to the Physical > Kingdom ...
2046/20/96 by Tinpan
205"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: alt.abuse.transcendence
206"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com". HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2076/20/96 by heavens
208OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.prophecies.nostradamus
209OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2106/20/96 by Rep
211OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: rec.arts.sf.tv
212OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2136/19/96 by heavens
214OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.culture.internet
215OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2166/19/96 by heavens
217OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.survival
218OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2196/19/96 by heavens
220OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.surrealism
221OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2226/20/96 by Rep
223OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: talk.religion.misc
224OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2256/20/96 by heavens
226"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: alt.religion.scientology
227heavensgate.com wrote: r> HEAVEN'S GATE r> >- Organized Religions Are Killers of Souls >- UFO's & Space Aliens - Sorting Good from Bad Busy ...
2286/22/96 by Michael 'Mike' Gormez
229OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.religion.scientology
230OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2316/20/96 by Rep
232OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.society.fruitopia
233OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2346/20/96 by Rep
235OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.meditation.transcendental
236OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2376/20/96 by Rep
238OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: tw.bbs.soc.religion
239OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2406/19/96 by heavens
241OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.uu.virtual-worlds.misc
242OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2436/19/96 by heavens
244"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: alt.society.civil-liberty
245"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com". HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2466/20/96 by heavens
247"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: talk.philosophy.humanism
248"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com". HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2496/20/96 by heavens
250OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.tv.kungfu
251OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2526/20/96 by Rep
253OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.tv.star-trek.ds9
254OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2556/20/96 by Rep
256OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.culture.www
257OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2586/19/96 by heavens
259OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.ufo.reports
260OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2616/20/96 by Rep
262"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: alt.internet.media-coverage
263"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com". HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2646/20/96 by heavens
265"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: talk.religion.newage
266"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com". HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2676/20/96 by heavens
268OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.meditation
269OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2706/20/96 by Rep
271OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.religion.islam
272OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2736/20/96 by Rep
274OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.society.anarchy
275OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2766/20/96 by Rep
277OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: soc.religion.gnosis
278OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2796/20/96 by heavens
280OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.paranormal.channeling
281OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2826/20/96 by Rep
283OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.religion.christian
284OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2856/20/96 by Rep
286OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.society.civil-liberty
287OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2886/20/96 by Rep
289OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.shared-reality.sf-and-fantasy
290OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2916/20/96 by Rep
292OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.anarchism
293OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2946/19/96 by heavens
295OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: soc.religion.quaker
296OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
2976/19/96 by heavens
298OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: sci.skeptic
299OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
3006/19/96 by heavens
301OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: tnn.internet
302OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
3036/19/96 by heavens
304OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.support.ex-cult
305OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
3066/20/96 by Rep
307"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com" Group: rec.radio.amateur.space
308"OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com". HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
3096/20/96 by heavens
310OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.society.civil-liberties
311OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
3126/20/96 by Rep
313OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: alt.galactic-guide
314OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the Door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
3156/20/96 by Rep
316OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com Group: git.club.guns
317OUT OF THIS WORLD (literally) www.heavensgate.com. HEAVEN'S GATE - How and When the door to the Physical Kingdom Level Above Human ...
3186/19/96 by heavens
319
320~~~~~
321
322HEAVENSGATE - IS IT TIME? Group: alt.religion.christian
323HEAVENSGATE - IS IT TIME? In article <31...@netnews.worldnet.att.net>, (watcher) wrote: > On Sun, 30 Jun 1996 08:02:58 GMT, (watcher) ...
3247/1/96 by Mr. John
325HEAVENSGATE - IS IT TIME? Group: a.bsu.religion
326HEAVENSGATE - IS IT TIME? In article <31...@netnews.worldnet.att.net>, (watcher) wrote: > On Sun, 30 Jun 1996 08:02:58 GMT, (watcher) ...
3277/4/96 by Alan B. Mac Farlane
328HEAVENSGATE - IS IT TIME? Group: alt.religion.christian.last-days
329HEAVENSGATE - IS IT TIME? AMEN!
3307/5/96 by TMaher2424
331HEAVENSGATE - IS IT TIME Group: alt.alien.research
332HEAVENSGATE - IS IT TIME. watcher wrote: > > On Sun, 30 Jun 1996 08:02:58 GMT, (watcher) wrote: > > >Work Quickly.... your time is short.
3337/5/96 by James E. Mays III
334We need more people like this. Group: uiuc.test
335heavensgate.com (Rep) Subject: THE JEWS AND CHRISTIANS PROMOTE LIES - UNKNOWINGLY Date: Thu, 01 Aug 1996 15:33:17 GMT ...
3368/1/96 by smith kathryn carter
337HEAVEN's GATE -- IS IT TIME? Group: alt.alien.visitors
338... of Souls >>>- UFO's & Space Aliens - Sorting Good from Bad >>>- Final Warning for Possible Survivors >>> >>> www.heavensgate.com >> >Tell us, ...
3397/4/96 by Chuck
340THE JEWS AND CHRISTIANS PROMOTE LIES - UNKNOWINGLY Group: alt.buddha.short.fat.guy
341heavensgate.com wrote: : >THE JEWS AND CHRISTIANS PROMOTE LIES - UNKNOWINGLY : > : >(THE JEWS SAY THEY LOVE MY FATHER - THE ...
3428/8/96 by Diane Brodson
343
344
345~~~~~~
346
347Anatomy of the Religion. CREATIONISTS. Start your engines! Group: alt.politics.usa.congress
348I guess these sites must all be true, too: http://members.aol.com/truwell/fk_book.htm http://www.heavensgate.com/ http://www.cts.com/~unarius/ So I ...
34911/21/96 by Psycho Dave
350Thanks for Actions Against CAN Group: alt.religion.scientology
351heavensgate.com wrote: > Here's a round of applause to the Church of Scientology for their > courageous action against the Cult Awareness Network.
35212/22/96 by Mike O'Connor
353
354~~~~
355
356
357alt.religion.scientology ›
358Thanks for Actions Against CAN
3596 posts by 6 authors 
360
361lah	
36212/21/96
363
364Here's a round of applause to the Church of Scientology for their
365courageous action against the Cult Awareness Network.
366From our point of view, no group was as "off" in their judgment of
367others as was CAN.  No group was as out of place in their
368condemnation of the innocent as was CAN.
369
370They accused our group of "cult activities" promoting all sort of
371lies about us.  When we asked to speak with them to correct some of
372their false accusations, they refused to listen.  Their only desire
373was to see our financial records and ironically, we really have no
374finances to speak of at all.  They exerted no effort to determine
375the facts even when those who could most accurately provide those
376facts were literally at their doorstep.
377
378We hope you will continue to advertise on behalf of freedom of
379thinking for all.
380
381History proves that nearly every conceptual milestone now considered
382"good" was at one time considered a "cult."  In the early/inception
383stages of any significantly updated thinking, it seems that some
384embodiment of narrow- minded opposition takes it upon themselves to
385threaten its right to exist.
386
387So thanks again from all of us determined to continue the search for
388Truth through alternate paths.  And thanks from those who support
389the right of others to do so as well.
390
391
392In Service to the Next Level,
393
394The so-called "UFO Cult"
395
396
397
398Click here to Reply
399
400Tilman Hausherr	
40112/22/96
402
403In <199612220630.AAA19074@Spacestar.Net>, "lah" <l...@heavensgatetoo.com>
404wrote:
405>The so-called "UFO Cult"
406
407*Which* UFO cult ? Scientology is itself an UFO cult !!
408
409Tilman
410
411
412
413
414Mike O'Connor	
41512/22/96
416
417In article <199612220630.AAA19074@Spacestar.Net>, r...@heavensgate.com wrote:
418> Here's a round of applause to the Church of Scientology for their
419> courageous action against the Cult Awareness Network.
420>
421> From our point of view, no group was as "off" in their judgment of
422> others as was CAN.  No group was as out of place in their
423> condemnation of the innocent as was CAN.
424"our" and "our group"? Well then in the first paragraph, don't you mean
425"here's a round of applause from us to us for what we did"?
426
427[...]
428
429
430> We hope you will continue to advertise on behalf of freedom of
431> thinking for all.
432Don't you mean "we hope we will continue to advertise ourselves"?
433
434[...]
435
436
437> So thanks again from all of us
438[...]
439Do you mean "from all of us to all of us"? -Mike
440
441
442seaorg	
44312/22/96
444
445In article <199612220630.AAA19074@Spacestar.Net>, l...@heavensgatetoo.com
446says...
447
448>
449>Here's a round of applause to the Church of Scientology for their
450>courageous action against the Cult Awareness Network.
451{cut}
452
453>They accused our group of "cult activities" promoting all sort of
454>lies about us.  When we asked to speak with them to correct some of
455>their false accusations, they refused to listen.  Their only desire
456>was to see our financial records and ironically, we really have no
457>finances to speak of at all.  
458{cut}
459
460>In Service to the Next Level,
461>
462>The so-called "UFO Cult"
463
464Would you mind posting your financial records?
465
466
467Matthew Bell	
46812/24/96
469
470Here is an even greater round  of applause for CAN who had the courage to
471stand up against the Crutch of Scientology.
472If you are so keen to set the record straight and allege that CAN was
473unprepared to listen to you then I will most happily do what they allegedly
474did not - though I would suggest that perhaps a good starting place for the
475COS is by answering some of  the statements/questions posted by people who
476have a greater knowledge of the subject than myself.
477
478The CoS is considered to be a  cult today and with the work of groups like
479CAN and newsgroups like this will continue to  be so - until of course they
480clear themselves of the manipulative, deceptive etc etc which they employ
481to gain recruits and dupe the public.
482
483
484Look forward to  hearing from you
485
486Matthew Bell
487
488ea...@aapi.co.uk
489
490
491Steve A	
49212/24/96
493
494On Sat, 21 Dec 1996 22:29:52 +0000, "lah" <l...@heavensgatetoo.com>
495wrote:
496> Here's a round of applause to the Church of Scientology for their
497> courageous action against the Cult Awareness Network.
498>
499> From our point of view, no group was as "off" in their judgment of
500> others as was CAN.  No group was as out of place in their
501> condemnation of the innocent as was CAN.
502Are you then suggesting that no action is too low to stoop to in
503beating your adversary?
504
505Is the fact that Kendrick Moxon, Jason Scott's former attorney, was
506dismissed by his client because he did not appear to be serving his
507interests, but rather those of an organisation of which he (Moxon) was
508a member, not something that you consider to be morally repugnant?
509
510Or is it that whatever organisation you claim to represent another
511that considers that the means justify the end, no matter what those
512means may be?
513
514> They accused our group of "cult activities" promoting all sort of
515> lies about us.  When we asked to speak with them to correct some of
516> their false accusations, they refused to listen.  Their only desire
517> was to see our financial records and ironically, we really have no
518> finances to speak of at all.  They exerted no effort to determine
519> the facts even when those who could most accurately provide those
520> facts were literally at their doorstep.
521I find your coyness about who "us" is somewhat suspicious.
522
523I am also familiar with these sorts of allegations regarding opponents
524of cults who "won't find the facts", where in fact the "facts" turn
525out to be whatever acceptable truths the cult sees fit to manufacture,
526and their opponent's only sin is that they failed to swallow this PR
527whole.
528
529> We hope you will continue to advertise on behalf of freedom of
530> thinking for all.
531>
532> History proves that nearly every conceptual milestone now considered
533> "good" was at one time considered a "cult."  In the early/inception
534> stages of any significantly updated thinking, it seems that some
535> embodiment of narrow- minded opposition takes it upon themselves to
536> threaten its right to exist.
537History has also proven that many organisations that make such claims
538(such as the National Socialists in Germany, the Order of the Solar
539Temple, Jim Jones' mob, Scientology, and the Moonies, to name but a
540handful) are capable of causing a considerable amount of damage to
541both their own members, and innocent third parties.
542
543Are you seriously suggesting that organisations such as these should
544be given carte blanche to lie, steal, kill, drive to suicide? Do you
545honestly consider that an organisation to which family members of cult
546victims can go voluntarily for independent support, in the absence of
547any other form of assistance, should not be allowed to exist?
548
549And, before you even think about suggesting it, no: this is not a case
550for self-regulation. We on a.r.s. have already seen the depths to
551which Scientology is prepared to sink in order to suppress open
552debate, and there is no place for their form of social control in
553society at large.
554
555> So thanks again from all of us determined to continue the search for
556> Truth through alternate paths.  And thanks from those who support
557> the right of others to do so as well.
558What about the right of former cult victims and families of current
559cult members to have an organisation to provide mutual support and
560information? Do they not have the same rights, too?
561
562
563--
564Steve A, SP4, GGBC, KBM, Unsalvageable PTS/SP #12
565ObDenial: I am not Arthur Stevens of Crawley.
566ObURLS: Beginners:  http://www.tiac.net/users/modemac/cos.html
567        In-depth:   http://www.cybercom.net/~rnewman/scientology/home.html
568        Harassment: http://www.cybercom.net/~rnewman/scientology/harass/timeline-95.html
569        Fools, losers, and mugs: http://www.scientology.org
570
571Child molesters! Join Scientology and grope with impunity! Why?
572
573Donald Strawn raped a 13 year old girl, and attempted to rape
574her 12 year old sister. The "Church" of Scientology in Clear-
575water attempted to blackmail the girls' mother into silence.
576
577
578~~~~
579
580Recent Activity
581User
582lah
583Email
584Recent Posts
585(alt.religion.scientology - 1 posts)
586Thanks for Actions Against CAN	alt.religion.scientology	12/21/96
587Post History
588(alt.religion.scientology - 1 posts)
5891996
590Dec
5911
592
593
594~~~~
595
596
597Sorted by relevanceSort by date	
598Posts: 372, groups: 0
599HEAVENSGATE MIRROR URL: Group: mn.general
600http://www5.zdnet.com/yil/higher/heavensgate/index.html Sorry I forgot the heavensgate mirror, there it is. Censored Girls Anonymous wrote: > > Now ...
6013/28/97 by Censored Girls Anonymous
602HeavensGate: When the internet is the newsman's source and competitor Group: alt.journalism
603HeavensGate: When the internet is the newsman's source and competitor. It didn't take long for the denizens of the internet to prod the search engines, ...
6043/28/97 by Jerry Trowbridge
605HEAVENSGATE!!!!!!!!! Group: soc.culture.indonesia
606Hallo Eh ada yang tau heavensgate tuh apaan sih!!! katanya Ada makhluk yang INtelligent diatas manusia ya!!! www.heavensgate.com Aja selalu ...
6073/28/97 by GIMBAL
608Mirror of Heavensgate Group: alt.ufo.reports
609Mirror of Heavensgate. Pathfinder.com has a mirror of the heavensgate.com web site. Larry-bob la...@io.com.
6103/28/97 by Laurence Roberts
611Mirror of Heavensgate (cult website) Group: alt.slack
612Pathfinder.com has put up a mirror of the cult's website heavensgate.com. This is the stuff about their philosophy, not their business stuff like the other ...
6133/28/97 by Laurence Roberts
614heavensgate Group: alt.atheism
615heavensgate. Did anyone check that web sight?I was horrified,myself. Yet when I think about it, this occult does have a lot incommon with our ...
6163/28/97 by bra...@mscomm.com
617Heavensgate purple. Is the purple pestilence involved? Group: alt.barney.dinosaur.die.die.die
618Heavensgate purple. Is the purple pestilence involved? An interesting detail about the mass-suicide of web-page programmers was that they all had ...
6193/28/97 by greg lang
620Lah, Ti, Do Heavensgate Group: alt.alien.visitors
621Lah, Ti, Do Heavensgate. Have you noticed that the world they refered to transending to was called Leavel Above Human or LAH. Now recolect the ...
6223/28/97 by someone
623More Heavensgate Postings Group: sci.skeptic
624More Heavensgate Postings. One of the guys who started the Hale-Bop "Aliens & End of World" story was late night radio talk show host Art Bell.
6253/28/97 by NoSpamPlease
626Heavensgate member wearing X-Files hat. Group: alt.tv.x-files
627Heavensgate member wearing X-Files hat. My local news reported this evening that one of the 39 persons was wearing a X-Files hat when he ...
6283/28/97 by Steve
629
630More Heavensgate Postings Group: sci.skeptic
631More Heavensgate Postings. One of the guys who started the Hale-Bop "Aliens & End of World" story was late night radio talk show host Art Bell.
6323/28/97 by NoSpamPlease
633Heavensgate member wearing X-Files hat. Group: alt.tv.x-files
634Heavensgate member wearing X-Files hat. My local news reported this evening that one of the 39 persons was wearing a X-Files hat when he ...
6353/28/97 by Steve
636"Heavensgate" cheeseheads? Group: alt.conspiracy
637"Heavensgate" cheeseheads? And the Packers were the team who beat the _Patriots_! Obviously these people were highly unpatriotic!
6383/28/97 by Horrigan
639The Concord Coalition and Heavensgate Group: soc.retirement
640The Concord Coalition and Heavensgate. We've been wondering what the motivation is for the Concord Coalition's vendetta against social security.
6413/28/97 by John K. Taber
642
643
644~~~~~
645
646From: r...@heavensgate.com (Rep)
647Newsgroups: alt.conspiracy
648Subject: TIME TO DIE FOR GOD?  OR ARMAGEDDON -- WHICH SIDE ARE YOU ON?
649Date: Fri, 20 Sep 1996 03:30:02 GMT
650Organization: Spacestar Communications, Minneapolis, MN, USA
651Lines: 172
652Message-ID: <3242044e...@news.spacestar.com>
653                       TIME TO DIE FOR GOD?
654                                        or
655         ARMAGEDDON -- WHICH SIDE ARE YOU ON?
656
657We are at the end of an Age, or the end of another civilization.  As
658was prophesied, this is the "judgment time" for all living creatures
659on or related to this planet -- in other words, the time when "where
660we find ourselves," as a result of our accumulated choices during our
661time here, determines our Judgment.
662
663~~~~
664
665Paleospeleology Group: sci.archaeology
666An approximate square of four stars, or half a square of three stars, which exists visually in the heavens from our point of view, has an objective existence
667... Legends say that knowledge had once led to the downfall > >of Man assisted by the fiery sword controlling the traffic at > >the gates to Paradise.
6683/29/97 by Jiri Mruzek
669
670~~
671
672[list] The Simpsons Cast List 2.4 Group: alt.tv.simpsons
673Later Cousin Francene, then joined a cult and became Mother Shabooboo. [9F08] Gladys Bouvier Aunt to Marge, Patty and ... Ralph Works at Springfield
674Public Library. [7F08] M!pa Exchange student. [8F16] Rex Fellow ... [3F14] Has limited capacities. All she can do is dial and yell. Emma Bumblebee ...
6753/31/97 by Dave Hall
676REPORT: Claytons Report 11 Group: aus.tv.x-files
677The driver yells angrily at the Finn, before slamming a floppy disc down on the desk and charging out. ... to the kitchen down hall to kitchen> Mr Boddy (
678who we thought was dead but he was >actually just pretending to be so that we all wouldn't kill him) slipped >down the secret passage to the Library .
6794/4/97 by Steve Leahy
680
681
682~~~~~~
683
684my kids do their chores Group: alt.parents-teens
685and it must be rated G, If > you have a video store or library (I know our library has it), you might > want to check it out for the family. I loved the advice that
686the human > kid gave the robot kid about being too perfect. And when the robot kid > yelled at his 'parent', I loved the reaction and results. A different ...
6874/20/97 by Adrienne or Phil
688Dirty film effect? Group: rec.video.desktop
689>>"When I die I want to pass on peacefully in my sleep like my grandfather did, not screaming and yelling like the passengers riding in his car. ... fix.net
690http://www.fix.net/~wjohn - Phone Dialer and Logger - CD Player and Library - Win3.1 / Win95 - CD Player imports from GIANT internet library - - FREE ...
6914/6/97 by Wolfgang John
692Things walking off. Was: Needles and remote controls WAS Re: flinging other stuff Group: rec.crafts.textiles.needlework
693I yell "Tessa - drop it" and she ducks her head and starts to > walk. I yell 'drop it' again and this time she does. ... After a long day of fulfilling volunteerism
694type obligations, I had gotten a video from the library and was settling in for a nice, long evening of stitching. Just as the movie began, I suddenly ...
6954/21/97 by TheBlues
696Re : new idea Group: rec.skydiving
697Thank You and I am sory for yelling So for implying that you're a hypocrit. -- Subtle __ I've deduced that it was Professor Plum, in the Library, with the ...
6983/28/97 by no_mor...@primeline.net
699Warner VHS ads for DVD Group: alt.video.dvd
700In a conversation with my local video store rental owner, he said that the manufacturers want to market DVD's directly to consumers, like CD's, and
701bypass ... I don't have any desire to own a library of movies-- I only watch a movie once or twice, and would prefer the convenience of renting or trading
702in.
7034/14/97 by Bob M
704Re : new idea Group: rec.pets
705... rec.video,rec.windsurfing,rec.woodworking Look familiar? So... What was this about "...CROSSPOSTING THIS CRAP!!!!!"??? > Thank You and I am
706sory for yelling So for implying that you're a hypocrit. -- Subtle __ I've deduced that it was Professor Plum, in the Library, with the pillow. -- Due to large ...
7073/28/97 by Subtle
708
709~~~~
710
711The Cult Of The Two (1) Group: alt.alien.visitors
712mailmasher.com wrote: > : X-No-Archive:yes > : From: Yellowrose > : Newsgroups: alt.alien.visitors > : Subject: The Cult Of The Two (1) > : Date: Sun, 30
713Mar 1997 > > : Yellowrose wrote: > : > > : > The Cult Of The ... For the first time, he > : > reacted with intense emotion and yelled, "HOW DARE YOU!
7144/12/97 by JP
715Cult - UL is its middle name Group: alt.folklore.urban
716I thought about this for a while and decided to ignore them from now on. When they yell "Sir, sir!" I ignore it. When they yell, "I have to check your bag!
7174/7/97 by Bif
718Staging of play vs. movie Group: alt.cult-movies.rocky-horror
719Audience: "Your children turn you on!" Frank: "Not often enough." Well, the first night there, I yelled to Frank during his drawn-out death, "Go for Oscar!
7204/9/97 by Arthur Levesque
721~~~~
722
723
724alt.alien.visitors ›
725The Cult Of The Two (1)
7265 posts by 4 authors 
727
728Garry Bryan	
7294/5/97
730
731lang...@mailmasher.com wrote:
732: X-No-Archive:yes
733: From: Yellowrose
734: Newsgroups: alt.alien.visitors
735: Subject: The Cult Of The Two (1)
736: Date: Sun, 30 Mar 1997
737: Yellowrose wrote:
738: >
739: > The Cult Of The Two
740: >
741: >                                   Part I
742: >
743: > I first heard about the Heaven's Gate cult in January, 1994, only back
744: > then they were calling themselves "The Total Overcomers" or "The
745: > Overcomers".  It was during a board meeting for the UFO organization I
746: > chaired that one member presented a flyer she had gotten from a friend
747: > about a group of people who were giving presentations about a "level
748: > above humanness" and UFOs.  The board member also said she had seen them
749: > interviewed on the ten o'clock news by a local TV station.
750
751: <s>
752
753: > ....  At one point, the male
754: > Overcomer said most people of the world had been programmed or
755: > "brainwashed" to believe Luciferian lies.  I asked him how he knew his
756: > "Elders" had not brainwashed THEM into believing in the "Level Above
757: > Human" as mind control is a very subtle process.  For the first time, he
758: > reacted with intense emotion and yelled, "HOW DARE YOU!!" A very visible
759: > "ripple" could be seen flowing through all four speakers and they all
760: > looked very pointedly at the male.  He seemed to blush for a second then
761: > sat back in his chair while the female speaker to his left calmly resumed
762: > the conversation with me.  He had reacted as a "human" and they all
763: > seemed to disapprove of this. ...
764: >
765
766: I remember hearing about them in the 70s. Dr. Jacques Vallee mentions
767: them in his "Messengers of Deception". This outcome seemed inevitable.
768
769:      At what psychological "point" does a subscribed belief in "bodily
770: ascension" transform into fully denying one's own body in order to "ascend"?
771
772: 39?
773: 3 + 9 = 12 [1 + 2 = 3]
774: 3 x 9 = 27 [2 + 7 = 9]
775: 9/3 = 3
776: 3/9 = .333
777
778: Why 39?
779
780Try 3+9=12
781    3*9=27
782    12+27=39!!!!!!!!
783   
784    Garry (%^{>
785   
786
787Click here to Reply
788
789ETS	
7904/10/97
791>
792> : 39?
793> : 3 + 9 = 12 [1 + 2 = 3]
794> : 3 x 9 = 27 [2 + 7 = 9]
795> : 9/3 = 3
796> : 3/9 = .333
797>
798> : Why 39?
799>
800> Try 3+9=12
801>     3*9=27
802>     12+27=39!!!!!!!!
803>    
804>     Garry (%^{>
805That is because you are counting in decimals. It's logical.
8063 x 3 = 9
80710 - 1 - 0 = 9
808
8091 1 1
8102 4 8
8113 9 18
812
8136 14 27
814
8151 x 7-1 (1 x 6),  (2 x 7),  4 x 7 - 1 (3 x 9), ...
816
817It's not magic, it's maths (match)
818
819
820Bruce Daniel Kettler	
8214/11/97
822
823ga...@sr.hp.com (Garry Bryan) wrote:
824>lang...@mailmasher.com wrote:
825
826>: X-No-Archive:yes
827>: From: Yellowrose
828>: Newsgroups: alt.alien.visitors
829>: Subject: The Cult Of The Two (1)
830>: Date: Sun, 30 Mar 1997
831>: Yellowrose wrote:
832
833>: > The Cult Of The Two
834>: >
835>: >                                   Part I
836>: >
837>: > I first heard about the Heaven's Gate cult in January, 1994, only back
838>: > then they were calling themselves "The Total Overcomers" or "The
839>: > Overcomers".  
840<snip>
841
842>:      At what psychological "point" does a subscribed belief in "bodily
843>: ascension" transform into fully denying one's own body in order
844>: to "ascend"?
845<snip>
846
847My question is where are their souls, or
848have they scattered in different directions after their soul
849departure?
850
851I don't believe they went to a spaceship, but I do wonder what
852their place, now, is?
853
854Anyone have ideas, channellings, etc.?
855
856
857E-mail: d...@psicounsel.com
858http://www.psicounsel.com/webmaster
859
860ART BELL CLUB URL: /artbellclub after "com"                
861
862
863JP	
8644/12/97
865Other recipients: ga...@sr.hp.com
866
867I'm editor of What's HOT! an UNDERGROUND news source on the www.
868We've posted on our site PROOF that the government is involved in the
869altering of the Heavens Gate web site to misinform the pubic about the
870group and possibly proof of UFO's..
871
872Here's the site
873
874http://www.whatshotin.com/Features/heavensgate8.shtml
875
876email your thoughts to me at
877
878J...@whatshotin.com
879
880or
881
882Edi...@whatshotin.com
883
884
885Garry Bryan wrote:
886>
887> lang...@mailmasher.com wrote:
888> : X-No-Archive:yes
889> : From: Yellowrose
890> : Newsgroups: alt.alien.visitors
891> : Subject: The Cult Of The Two (1)
892> : Date: Sun, 30 Mar 1997
893>
894> : Yellowrose wrote:
895> : >
896> : > The Cult Of The Two
897> : >
898> : >                                   Part I
899> : >
900> : > I first heard about the Heaven's Gate cult in January, 1994, only back
901> : > then they were calling themselves "The Total Overcomers" or "The
902> : > Overcomers".  It was during a board meeting for the UFO organization I
903> : > chaired that one member presented a flyer she had gotten from a friend
904> : > about a group of people who were giving presentations about a "level
905> : > above humanness" and UFOs.  The board member also said she had seen them
906> : > interviewed on the ten o'clock news by a local TV station.
907>
908> : <s>
909>
910> : > ....  At one point, the male
911> : > Overcomer said most people of the world had been programmed or
912> : > "brainwashed" to believe Luciferian lies.  I asked him how he knew his
913> : > "Elders" had not brainwashed THEM into believing in the "Level Above
914> : > Human" as mind control is a very subtle process.  For the first time, he
915> : > reacted with intense emotion and yelled, "HOW DARE YOU!!" A very visible
916> : > "ripple" could be seen flowing through all four speakers and they all
917> : > looked very pointedly at the male.  He seemed to blush for a second then
918> : > sat back in his chair while the female speaker to his left calmly resumed
919> : > the conversation with me.  He had reacted as a "human" and they all
920> : > seemed to disapprove of this. ...
921> : >
922>
923> : I remember hearing about them in the 70s. Dr. Jacques Vallee mentions
924> : them in his "Messengers of Deception". This outcome seemed inevitable.
925>
926> :      At what psychological "point" does a subscribed belief in "bodily
927> : ascension" transform into fully denying one's own body in order to "ascend"?
928>
929> : 39?
930> : 3 + 9 = 12 [1 + 2 = 3]
931> : 3 x 9 = 27 [2 + 7 = 9]
932> : 9/3 = 3
933> : 3/9 = .333
934>
935> : Why 39?
936>
937> Try 3+9=12
938>     3*9=27
939>     12+27=39!!!!!!!!
940>
941>     Garry (%^{>
942>
943
944ETS	
9454/13/97
946ridiCult of two
947Their physical place is now in history. Their impact lives on in people who
948are talking about them.
949
950Incredible how people allow other people to fool around with them.
951
952Go to the beach, enjoy the sunset, the wind and the waves, and then wonder
953how it's possible that you can experience those things, how you can enjoy
954them.
955That's happiness. Believing (being affraid of) in conspiracy is called
956paranoia. Do you realy think your government is covering things up? If that
957would be the case.. the do a great job, for never in history did anybody
958succeed in covering things up.
959
960Get real.. they can hardly assure healthcare or education, and you are
961thinking that they are part of this big, big evil plan? nature in man
962doesn't allow those things to happen, because that would be in
963contradiction with the survival-instincts of our species. That certain
964people believe things is just another part of this survival-instinct.
965
966Be honoust to yourself: can you rely on yourself? I bet you can.
967
968ETS
969
970~~~~
971
972Steven Hill on Mission Impossible Group: alt.tv.mission-imposs
973aol.com wrote: > > In article <1997...@ladder01.news.aol.com>, > b...@aol.com (BCH66) wrote: > > > > Bruce Geller had Steven Hill in mind ...
9744/7/97 by Collin Freeman
975Steven Hill "the best" Group: alt.tv.mission-imposs
976Steven Hill "the best". Yes, after reading some of the articles here in this group, I must agree, mr. Hill was the best ! some years ago i saw the episodes ...
9774/7/97 by Eric-Jan
978OCI's opinit function Group: comp.databases.oracle.misc
979You just need to link ociw32.lib Steven Hill wrote in article <01bc7d2e$e481a300$53962581@steven-hill>... > I believe it's either ocidfn.h or ocikpr.h ...
9806/25/97 by Fernando Pereira
981Question about David J. Howe Books Group: rec.arts.drwho
982... visisted Steven Hill's Doctor Who: The Reference Library home page > (http://shill.simplenet.com/howe/howe.htm) and have a question about some ...
9837/22/97 by Steven Hill
984[ANN] 4D -> Oracle Group: comp.databases.oracle.misc
985... subscribe to each check out www.fsti.com and www.asg.com). I'm sure users in those groups would be interested in your offerings as well. Steven Hill.
9863/28/97 by Steven Hill
987Best Toupee in H'wood Group: alt.tv.mission-imposs
988In article <1997...@ladder01.news.aol.com>, br...@aol.com (Briggs1999) wrote: > Did anyone know that Steven Hill wore a toupee when ...
9894/25/97 by Susan Walter
990The best and worst TV drama Group: alt.showbiz.gossip
991Only Steven Hill remains from > the original cast, (snip) Funny thing about Steven Hill. Even the media has cited him as the only original cast member ...
9925/11/97 by Stephen Wellington
993New Cast: Same Cast Group: alt.tv.law-and-order
994>>(Some nitpicker might note that the pilot had a different DA than Steven >>Hill: Old News.) > >Some other nitpicker might note that in the transition ...
9957/23/97 by Phil Oliver
996
997~~~~
998
999Are there Reds within the Libertarian Party? Group: alt.society.civil-liberty
1000... a more substantive response: William Redpath-Libertarian http://www.igc.apc.org/enVISION/about.html About Steven Hill Steven Hill is a journalist.
10014/24/97 by LIB_NW
1002Info on Det. Profacci, please. Group: alt.tv.law-and-order
1003Profacci, please. The question was posed about Profaci: : > Besides Steven Hill, he's the only cast member who's been : > there since season 1, right?
10046/26/97 by Chris Crandall
1005Design your favorite IMF team Group: alt.tv.mission-imposs
1006Hill was o.k. but >Graves was more believable. You could get more into the show with his >character than you could with Steven Hill's character.
10077/25/97 by BCH66
1008Leading man switch Group: alt.tv.mission-imposs
1009I've always liked Hunter as an actor, and I noticed other comparisons between this switch and the Steven Hill/Peter Graves switch: 1. Both of the ...
10104/25/97 by COLLIN FREEMAN
1011WTB: "Sacrifice" Group: alt.video.laserdisc
10127/28/97 by Steven Hill
1013Clarification Group: alt.tv.mission-imposs
1014Steven Hill > is still alive and can handle the role beautifully.And that's a movie I > will see on opening day. Absolutely, bring back Briggs! The only ...
10156/3/97 by Rod Edgar
1016[Fwd: Re: Rite-wing Gossip on Libertarians] Group: talk.politics.libertarian
1017... >Steven Hill of LaborNet:http://www.igc.apc.org/cvd/board.htm >Here's Hill's business card: >http://www.capital.net/users/monitor/igchill.jpg > >Yes, ...
10185/25/97 by America First
1019[Fwd: Re: Rite-wing Gossip on Libertarians] Group: alt.politics.usa.republican
1020... >Steven Hill of LaborNet:http://www.igc.apc.org/cvd/board.htm >Here's Hill's business card: >http://www.capital.net/users/monitor/igchill.jpg > >Yes, ...
10215/25/97 by America First
1022Telemovie CD available in US? Group: rec.arts.drwho
10237/28/97 by Steven Hill
1024MISSION IMPOSSIBLE disguise Group: alt.tv.mission-imposs
1025STEVEN HILL plays both parts but it is interesting to note that when HILL is playing Rollin Hand disguised as Dan Briggs he looks physically different ...
10267/22/97 by BCH66
1027Doctor Who just for fun Group: rec.arts.drwho
10287/22/97 by Steven Hill
1029BBC vote underway! Group: rec.arts.drwho
10307/28/97 by Steven Hill
1031DR.WHO TV-GUIDE VOTE Group: rec.arts.drwho
10327/30/97 by Steven Hill
1033Season Finale (SPOILER!) Group: alt.tv.law-and-order
1034(I'm a Steven Hill fan from WAY back.) I thought it was a WONDERFUL touch to have Roy Thinnes play the Assistant AG who takes over the case (so ...
10355/22/97 by Ed Dravecky III
1036Time Meddler question Group: rec.arts.drwho
10377/22/97 by Steven Hill
1038YOUR CHANCE TO APPEAR ON BBC1 TALKING ABOUT DOCTOR WHO Group: rec.arts.drwho
10397/29/97 by Steven Hill
1040Watching DW for fun Group: rec.arts.drwho
1041Steven Hill wrote: >In another one of those popular threads in which people >list their top n stories, I bring you: > >What are the three (or five or ...
10427/20/97 by BFElliott
1043FILE SPLITTING Group: comp.soft-sys.sas
10446/2/97 by Steven Hill
1045Determining Multicolinearity Group: comp.soft-sys.sas
1046On Mon, 21 Apr 1997 17:17:13 -0400, Steven Hill wrote: >SAS-Ler's: > >Does anyone understand how to interpret the output of the SAS Proc Reg ...
10474/21/97 by Alan Neustadtl
1048What's that robot ? Group: rec.arts.drwho
10497/19/97 by Steven Hill
1050Glaze additives -Reply Group: bit.listserv.clayart
1051Even with some of our glazes that have a tendency to really cake up at the bottom of the bucket like Woo Blue Brown and Steven Hill 232 Clear.
10526/10/97 by Rafael Molina-Rodriguez (Rafael Molina-Rodriguez)
1053Strange thread Group: uk.people.teens
1054dcs.ed.ac.uk (Steven Hill) 1 te...@tickling.com (Terri DiSisto) 1 Chris Dudley 1 A*I*D*A*N 1 Daniel 1 "Jonathan E Low" -- Tim Bray simple .sig :) If ...
10555/31/97 by Tim Bray
1056International Call for Slides for Book Group: bit.listserv.clayart
1057The book will include the work of such notables as Michael Simon, Linda Arbuckle, Chris Staley, Steven Hill, Pete Pinnell, etc, etc, The bulk of the book ...
10586/19/97 by Coakes, Michelle
1059Clay in Kansas City??? Group: bit.listserv.clayart
1060KC Studio Potters Lynn Smiser Bowers: (816) 561-1755 Tricia & Ron Gerard: (913) 764-6031(in Olathe) Steven Hill: (816) 523-7316 Rebecca Koop: ...
10617/29/97 by Micheal Smith
1062WTB: Sacrifice (Tarkovsky) Group: alt.video.laserdisc
10637/22/97 by Steven Hill
1064Real Audio Group: rec.music.newage
1065All, The question about Real Audio has prompted me to ask if there are Public Radio Stations broadcasting Steven Hill's Heart's of Space radio show ...
10666/7/97 by Jim Yahnke
1067Novelization archive Group: rec.arts.drwho
10687/19/97 by Steven Hill
1069Androids of Tara? Group: rec.arts.drwho
10707/22/97 by Steven Hill
1071<title>What's German for ?</title> wibble > > Actually, it's "bustenhalter", which I think is funnier!. > ...and there is no truth to the rumor that the inventor of the bra was > named "Titsling" just as much as ... Group: alt.tasteless.jokes
10724/17/97 by Steven Hill
1073
1074~~~
1075Plagiarism? -Reply Group: bit.listserv.clayart
1076... Larry Bush, Brian Kemp, Adelaide Paul, > Walter Keeler, Marie Woo, Tom Coleman, Bernard Leach, Kurt Weiser, > Steven Hill, Daniel Rhodes, and ...
10775/2/97 by Hluch - Kevin A.
1078Hanegraaff Called me on the phone Group: alt.religion.christian.calvary-chapel
1079Or it may have been Steven Hill, the no-longer-itinerant evangelist) who prophesied that CRI would be gone by July 4th? The prophecy says that CRI ...
10805/2/97 by Scott Pierce
1081LAW & ORDER: Jack McCoy (Sam Waterston) Group: rec.arts.tv
1082Adam has been on the show since the first episode -- played by Steven Hill -- but the character was not in the pilot. [Have I confused you enough?]
10835/23/97 by Tina S
1084"Courtney is the greatest", said Andrew Shue to EW Group: alt.showbiz.gossip
1085Maybe she means > >Steven Hill on Law and Order. I'm guessing, but those would be good > >ones. > Jeff replied: > Nah. I think she meant Winsor ...
10865/25/97 by Sarah Weinman
1087
1088~~~
1089
1090
1091"Athemysst" <kalu...@jetlink.net> wrote:
1092
1093>My take on these surgeries is not that Do thought sex was "wrong," but
1094>rather that one was better off without sexual impulses.  He also thought
1095>(and explained on the web page) that sexuality was a "mammalian"
1096>characteristics that the group was going to evolve beyond.  They really
1097>believed they were transcending the human condition and the mammalian
1098>condition at the same time.  The one member who spoke about his castration
1099>on tape said it was the best decision of his life and such a relief,
1100>because he could focus on spiritual things.  
1101<snip>
1102Paraphrasing Time magazine.... The Washington Post reported that in
11031971 - Applewhite checked into a psychiatric hospital to be cured of
1104his homosexuality after an affair with a student which led to his
1105being fired from the university. He had also been fired from another
1106job for similar reasons in l964. Castration obviously (I don't know)
1107cured those sexual impulses.  In their credo (if one can call it a
1108credo) - sexual thoughts were a no-no and interfered. Why some
1109of the others were castrated...who knows. The ex-member who
1110has appeared on Larry King's - "Dick Joslyn" stated that he was
1111a gay man. Maybe those who were admittedly gay - opted for
1112castration.   He didn't mention being castrated.  All too strange -
1113and so were they.
1114
1115~~~
1116
1117Heaven's Gate Castrations Group: alt.true-crime
1118Why some of the others were castrated...who knows. The ex-member who has appeared on Larry King's - "Dick Joslyn" stated that he was a gay man.
11194/3/97 by gaetz
1120Quote in Time Magazine Group: rec.boats.paddle
1121----Former Heaven's Gate cult member Dick Joslyn during an interview on CBS News' This Morning show. Anyone disagree? Riviera Ratt.
11224/13/97 by Witness002
1123Castration, alien worship among practices of California cult Group: alt.misc.forteana
1124Each one did this of their own volition even though they were in a cult," said Dick Joslyn of Tampa, Fla., who was a member of Heaven's Gate for 15 ...
11253/29/97 by rep...@mic.dundee.ac.uk
1126
1127~~~
1128
1129 Search results for "Volk Han" after:1997/03/02 before:1997/05/31 (includes private results when you are logged in)
1130Sorted by relevanceSort by date	
1131Posts: 9, groups: 0
1132[WCW vs. The World] OK... let's Americanize this sucker!!! Group: rec.sport.pro-wrestling.fantasy
1133... Volk Han (Pancrase Wrestling) * Sherlock = Ken Shamrock (Pancrase Wrestling) * Kaiji = Yoshiaka Fujiwara (Professional Wrestling Fujiwara Gumi) ...
11344/9/97 by Dainja
1135WCW Vs. The World Character List Group: rec.sport.pro-wrestling
1136... Funaki Masakatsu Uraki Pancrease Yoji Anjoh 200 Wins UWFI Ken Shamrock Sherlock WWF/UFC Volk Han Konaka Pancrease Scott Norton Gaijin ...
11374/3/97 by Michael Sisler
1138
1139~~~~~~
1140
1141~~~~~~
1142May 6, 2019 
1143Wrestling Observer Newsletter
1144
1145PO Box 1228, Campbell, CA 95009-1228 ISSN10839593 May 6, 2019
1146
1147 
1148
1149IMPACT REBELLION POLL RESULTS
1150
1151Thumbs up 72 (100.0%)
1152
1153Thumbs down 0 (00.0%)
1154
1155In the middle 0 (00.0%)
1156
1157 
1158
1159BEST MATCH POLL
1160
1161LAX vs. Pentagon Jr. & Fenix 45
1162
1163Tessa Blanchard vs. Gail Kim 27
1164
1165 
1166
1167WORST MATCH POLL
1168
1169Scarlett Bordeaux vs. Rohit Raju 55
1170
1171Brian Cage vs. Johnny Impact 12
1172
1173Based on e-mails and phone calls to the Observer as of Tuesday, 4/30.
1174
1175 
1176
1177Before the 4/25 WWE earnings report, analysts who, for average, pegged the stock value at $105 or greater per share, noted that the company would likely lose money in the first quarter and it was nothing to worry about given the new TV contracts and huge profits coming in October.
1178
1179So what happened?
1180
1181First, the company greatly missed on analysts predictions, falling $15 million to $17 million short on revenue, and losing about $8.4 million during the quarter as opposed to the $700,000 to $800,000 loss number that was projected.
1182
1183The stock, which earlier in the week topped the magic $100 per share mark, closed on 5/1 at $82.63 per share. It had a big decline after the telling results of the quarter, which continued for a few days. It started coming back but then fell another $1.22 per share on 5/1 after the announcement of the Saudi Arabia show. It left the company with a market value of $6.449 billion.
1184
1185Still, the company’s long-term economics are no different today than they were a few weeks ago. But for the first time, the stock market analysts did start to notice what fans have noted for years, that the real economic engagement metrics and metrics of paying popularity are declining at a significant rate, and getting worse.
1186
1187The problem is that, while fans know there are issues with the company, when it comes to creative, creating stars and connecting with a very unique audience, many others have been buffaloed for years with the fake stats that, quite frankly, a lot of investors are buffaloed by. But in this case reality hit. All those billions of social media followers and trillions of YouTube views, yet all that does is expose how meaningless those numbers are when every single aspect of consumer spending on business was way down even without figures in those categories comparing favorably to even people like the NFL and NBA.
1188
1189To some, WWE’s explanation that it was an unusual quarter due to so many injuries, but that everyone is now back, holds little water. Injuries are common and there will always be them. Largely because, with the absence of John Cena, who has largely moved on, nobody else who is a significant player wasn’t there this quarter. Roman Reigns returned late in the quarter and business fell further behind last year after his very brief return. Seth Rollins was injured but the audience was never told, he was still featured on all but a few TV shows and advertised for all the house shows. They put over that things are changing because they’ve brought up so many new people from NXT who are just starting, except they’ve already squandered almost all of them. The only two they’ve gotten behind were Lars Sullivan and Lacey Evans, which says where the mentality about new stars is, exactly like 30 years ago, a freakish body in guys and below average work and above average looks for women. And to Evans’ credit, she does carry herself like a star, but with the quality of the consistent in-ring level so high (by WWE standards, not world standards obviously), is there an audience that wants to see nice looking woman do average or below average wrestling matches in spotlight positions?
1190
1191The company, due to the TV deals that start paying off in October, is still completely idiot proof . Despite confidently saying they knew the answer of how to fix the problems, this quarter showed the opposite, with significant declines in ratings, attendance and merchandise sales, and for the first time, a small decline in network subscriptions.
1192
1193The key is the biggest time period of the year, the lead to WrestleMania, resulted in far less interest across the board than any year in recent memory. Even some artificial things, such as running a stadium instead of an arena for Royal Rumble, and doing less house shows, so the better attended television should make for a higher average, still couldn’t come close to camouflaging the decline.
1194
1195The declines were such that the company had to address it. The previous story was that they were down, but they were going to redo the arena business, knew the problems and knew the solutions.
1196
1197Here we are, and the arena business hasn’t improved, even its most favorable time of the year, and the declines in all aspects were the most significant to date.
1198
1199If you throw out the Rumble, live events were down to a 4,422 per show average. The Raws leading to WrestleMania, even in markets like Boston and Chicago, failed to sell out.
1200
1201Vince McMahon opened the call getting right to the subject everyone wanted answers for, but his answer should have been far more concerning.
1202
1203“We had a very unusual situation in terms of top talents as well as mid-card talent being out, some 15 talents, of course, in that period. When you don’t have talent, you don’t have storylines, you’re not going to do that well in terms of live events , in terms of television ratings, it was like a cascade of things that happened. I’m happy to say, we have all those challenges. But in addition to that, we have new challenges coming in.
1204
1205“And during that period of time, when top talent was out, we made new talent, and just to belabor the point in terms of where we are with the quarter, but the future, and when you look at that and I’m not trying to pull the future for you guys, except to tell you what it’s going t be like. We’ve hired new people on the writing team that are going to help us out in terms of television ratings and digital, social, all that sort of stuff. We’ve got a new team in terms of live events that have just started now. So we’ll see the live events are going to continue on an upward trend.”
1206
1207Co-President George Barrios also used the injury excuse to explain the first quarter declines.
1208
1209“As Vince mentioned last quarter, we discussed the absence of several talent and our belief is these absences had a negative impact on our engagement metrics. Q1 saw a continuation of these trends, as domestic ratings for Raw and Smackdown declined approximately 14 percent and 13 percent respectively and average attendance at our North American events declined 11 percent. On a positive note, network average paid subscribers increased two percent and digital video consumption increased 23 percent. Looking to the future, we believe our engagement metrics will improve with the return of our talent, the emergence of new storylines and new superstars and as well as launch our new season following a successful WrestleMania.”
1210
1211The network average number for the quarter being up is misleading, because it was up above last year in December and January, but declined from last year in February and March to the point the end number was down.
1212
1213So the excuse for the decline was injuries. This has been, at least the ticket sales and merchandise end of the business, one that is star driven. But who was really out? John Cena was gone, and it’s clear that hurts a lot, particularly to swing fans. But he’s largely moved on and can’t be the face of the company any longer. And that’s not something they can tell investors, who think all the money they spend on developmental should lead to all kinds of new superstars and that you can handpick the next Cena, which isn’t the case.
1214
1215Roman Reigns has been pushed as the new top star, and he was out of action until 2/25, but he was back for nearly half the quarter, and the important half. Braun Strowman was injured, but he also returned. The reality is the declines increased after Reigns, Rollins, Strowman, Owens and Zayn returned. Becky Lynch did an injury angle and didn’t wrestle on house shows, but he was front and center on television on both brands, and only missed a few shows in selling injuries and a suspension. But that was all storyline, so the company can’t use the excuse of bad luck with her since they scripted it all themselves.
1216
1217----
1218
1219
1220WWE officially announced its third show in Saudi Arabia on 6/7 in Jeddah, the same city the second show was held at.
1221
1222The shows, the company’s biggest of the year as far as dollar value goes, will feature the highest paid talent, in this case returns of Bill Goldberg, The Undertaker and Brock Lesnar.
1223
1224Undertaker and Lesnar were known to be returning but Goldberg came out of the blue. It’s an announcement that to me, personally, is highly disappointing. Yet, in a sense, to say that, it would be hypocritical because there were no qualms in the past about anyone else, whether it be Chris Jericho or Shawn Michaels or Kane, who have all done similar shows, in the case of Michaels professing to be highly religious and with Kane being an elected mayor, who did the show with virtually no backlash.
1225
1226Those in WWE say the company approached Goldberg, figuring he was the one guy left who could go to AEW and perhaps bring back lapsed fans, similar to how Vince McMahon, without the benefit of hindsight, left the door open to WCW for Hulk Hogan, Roddy Piper and Randy Savage in the 90s.
1227
1228Only two performers, John Cena and Daniel Bryan, have refused to do shows. Both did the first show and then refused to do the second, even though both were advertised in key positions for those shows until the last week.
1229
1230Sami Zayn was pulled from the first show because the government of Saudi Arabia didn’t want him in due to his Syrian ancestry. He was injured prior to the second show. It will be interesting to see if he’s allowed to be on this show. The entire deal is troublesome for obvious reasons, and the killing of Jamal Khashoggi is only a small but important one of them. Besides clearly establishing the promotion as incredibly sleazy for continuing to do business, it’s worse because while the money is significant, in the big picture, given the revenues from the new television deals, the company is in strong financial position without them. Many companies from the U.S. have pulled out of doing business, and Endeavor, the parent company of UFC, returned a $400 million investment by the Saudi government, a deal that required them to take out financing to do. Worse, the company has prided itself on being open minded, with the idea they are leaders in a so-called women’s revolution, as well as the idea they are open minded to other minority groups, whether they be race, sexual persuasion or ethnicity. But this deal clearly speaks that their money isn’t where their mouth is, because they are doing business with people who not only don’t share those beliefs, and every business does have to deal with that, but also don’t allow them, on their own show, to bring certain stars.
1231
1232Obviously, there are going to be many active wrestlers who don’t want to go, just as there will be many who don’t care. There will be some who will just keep quiet, and those who won’t trying to play up the party line. That’s the nature of the beast. But realistically, none have the power except for the top few, to make the decision to not go without repercussions.
1233
1234Cena obviously does. He has never talked about why he decided against going to the second show. Part of the deal with both he and Bryan was being asked not to publicly talk about it, or acknowledge not going before the show took place, because doing so would create a media story that would be unfavorable to the company. Even after the fact neither talked publicly about it.
1235
1236Where Goldberg is different is that he’s not a company regular. Obviously he’ll be getting giant money on his new deal. A few performers have gotten seven figures for these shows and the fact Goldberg wrestles to sparingly tells you he’s not doing anything cheap, let alone this.
1237
1238I guess the difference is Goldberg is, regardless of what you think of him as a performer, a good guy who does a lot of stuff wanting no credit for it. And unlike a performer on the main roster, he’s not in a position where there is pressure on him to do anything he doesn’t want to. Granted, there may be no single day paydays in his future at this level, and ultimately that’s the decision, but high school textbooks in Saudi Arabia promote anti-Semitism and doing the bidding of that kind of government is a real moral dilemma. This isn’t Paul Heyman who is under contract to the company and, like all but a few people, could be fired at whim for good or bad reasons at any time.
1239
1240And it isn’t as if Goldberg couldn’t get huge money for limited appearances doing pro wrestling elsewhere should he want to go that route. Could he make seven figures in a day elsewhere? No. And at the end of the day, that’s your answer to the question. And there are people who would turn that, and more, down, in this circumstance. But they are the exceptions to the rule. He just happens not to be one of those exceptions.
1241
1242Because of the show, the 6/8 Takeover in San Jose is off. At the 5/1 NXT taping, the wrestlers talked about Takeover, but never mentioned a location. The plan right now is for the show to be moved to 6/1. No location has been announced but cities thrown out have included Bridgeport, CT and Atlanta.
1243
1244The WWE has firmed up most of the card for its next PPV, Money in the Bank, on 5/19 in Hartford.
1245
1246The top matches are Seth Rollins vs. A.J. Styles for the Universal title and Kofi Kingston vs. Kevin Owens for the WWE championship.
1247
1248
1249
1250
1251~~~~~~~
1252
1253May 27, 2019
1254
1255Wrestling Observer Newsletter
1256
1257PO Box 1228, Campbell, CA 95009-1228 ISSN10839593 May 27, 2019
1258
1259 
1260
1261WWE MONEY IN THE BANK POLL RESULTS
1262
1263Thumbs up 167 (58.8%)
1264
1265Thumbs down 45 (15.8%)
1266
1267In the middle 72 (25.4%)
1268
1269 
1270
1271BEST MATCH POLL
1272
1273Seth Rollins vs. A.J. Styles 244
1274
1275Men’s MITB match 25
1276
1277Bayley vs. Charlotte 13
1278
1279 
1280
1281WORST MATCH POLL
1282
1283Shane McMahon vs. The Miz 69
1284
1285Roman Reigns vs. Elias 67
1286
1287Becky Lynch vs. Lacey Evans 32
1288
1289Rey Mysterio vs. Samoa Joe 28
1290
1291Tony Nese vs. Ariya Daivari 13
1292
1293Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte 9
1294
1295Based on phone calls and e-mails to the Observer as of Tuesday, 5/21.
1296---------
1297Still, even with WWE’s live attendance being down in most of the larger arenas on the last two tours, just the value of the name, the history, and perceived star power and depth of the roster still will keep it viewed as the major league brand, even if less visible. For a similar situation, Bellator has had some of its bigger shows and U.K. shows on far wider-reaching platforms than BT Sports, and even runs far more often in the U.K. But UFC events at the O2 Arena in London and other venues are usually instant sellouts, and Bellator events are not. UFC is still considered by MMA fans as the major league group, even if, due to time slots and channel penetration, more television viewers watch Bellator.
1298
1299Ric Flair, 70, underwent heart surgery on 5/20, which was deemed a success after significant health issues led to him being rushed to the hospital for days earlier.
1300
1301Flair was first diagnosed with heart issues in 2002, at the age of 53, which at the time his doctor attributed to his drinking and steroid use. He himself has publicly attributed it to the drinking but said it was not due to steroids, which while he admitted usage of, said he was never a heavy user. After several months off, he was cleared and returned to in-ring action and continued to wrestle regularly for years.
1302
1303Flair had a major health scare in August 2017, when he was placed in an medically induced coma for 11 days after rupturing his intestine. He underwent emergency surgery and was given a 20 percent chance of surviving the surgery, because of the complications he had that included his kidneys shutting down, heart issues and pneumonia. He needed dialysis for a period of time after surgery and has had multiple surgeries related to issues from that time period.
1304
1305Flair was scheduled to undergo heart surgery last week, with the idea he would recover in time to appear at Starrcast this coming weekend in Las Vegas. But he ended up with a health scare that rushed him to the Gwinnett Medical Center in Duluth, GA, just outside of Atlanta, where he lives. Complications delayed his surgery until 5/20.
1306
1307The family reported that the surgery went well. However, due to the timing, he was unable to go to Las Vegas this weekend. Son-in-law Conrad Thompson had promoted Flair as probably the biggest name for Starrcast, held in conjunction with AEW’s debut show, once WWE pulled Undertaker off the event.
1308
1309Flair was back home on 5/22.
1310
1311Her was scheduled for a panel discussion with Ricky Steamboat covering their feud, and in particular the 30th anniversary of a series of four different five-star matches the two had in a program over the NWA world heavyweight championship in 1989. The two, who wrestled regularly starting in the late 70s, had what is generally considered the greatest in-ring rivalry of that era.
1312
1313He was also scheduled for a celebrity roast, which was going to appear as a television pay-per-view event as well as was the key event as part of the Starrcast iPPV package on Fite TV.
1314
1315It was announced that the roast was being postponed and would take place at a later date.
1316
1317Flair has said he hopes to be back on the road doing appearances in ten to 14 days.
1318
1319Brock Lesnar and Bayley were the winners of the Money in the Bank matches on a generally well regarded WWE PPV show on 5/19.
1320
1321The show featured a Seth Rollins Universal title defense over A.J. Styles that may have been WWE’s best main roster match so far this year. The show featured a lot of short matches, most by design, one not by design, and a show-long angle culminating with the Lesnar win.
1322
1323Lesnar, who was not advertised for the show, was kept away from everyone. There were people in the company aware Lesnar was there and would be part of the show, but most were not. Backstage, those who needed to know, were told that Ali was winning the Money in the Bank match, a change from Drew McIntyre, who had been said was the planned winner earlier in the week.
1324
1325As noted last week, the angle where Sami Zayn defeated Braun Strowman to take his spot in the match was part of the storyline that paid off during the show. Zayn appeared early, going to HHH and fearing an attack by Strowman that night. HHH said that Strowman would be banned from the building. Later, Strowman was shown throwing things around backstage and looking for Zayn. After that, Zayn was found attacked, injured, and hung upside down. After the next match, HHH confronted Strowman, who denied doing it. HHH said that he wouldn’t allow Strowman in the match for taking out Zayn and told him to leave the building. HHH said he wasn’t going to call the police and just asked him to leave. He then said he was leaving. They said Zayn was injured and taken to a local medical facility.
1326
1327The wrestlers in the match were all told that Ali was not winning, but that Ali would be on top when an eighth wrestler would arrive and he’d knock Ali off and be the winner. They were not told who the wrestler would be, but the idea was that they would believe it to be Strowman.
1328
1329Right before the match started, Ali was told it was Lesnar, but told to keep it quiet.
1330
1331The timing was silly, but it kind of had to be. Ali was at the top of the ladder. Everyone else was taken out. He was about to take down the briefcase when Lesnar’s music played. Ali had plenty of time at this point to unhook the briefcase and win. Instead, he just froze. Lesnar came down fast, with no care about human life, taking two cameramen out in the process. He then got in the ring, climbed the ladder, destroyed Ali and pulled the briefcase down to win. Ali was bleeding badly although the cameras were instructed not to shoot him.
1332
1333The heat was that seven guys destroyed their bodies in a long match and then Lesnar just walked in and won. The entire scripting of that was designed to get the reaction that Lesnar was handed another thing again without working for it while the rest of the roster is out there killing themselves.
1334
1335The finish was a great surprise pop, and the crowd went crazy for it, even with Lesnar as a heel, because they want surprises and happenings.
1336
1337On the flip side, it was all about a momentary pop and surprise, as well as two weeks of television ratings. The feeling was that the Lesnar surprise would help ratings based on curiosity the next night, which it did. It was also used in an attempt to keep the audience into the third hour, by teasing Lesnar would cash in against either Rollins or Kofi Kingston. Lesnar came out, teased cashing in, backed out, but Paul Heyman said that next week on Raw, from Kansas City (what a weird coincidence that the Raw 20 years to the week of Owen Hart’s death in Kemper Arena would be booked for Kansas City, which is probably something that won’t be addressed on the show), Lesnar would say who he is cashing it in against.
1338
1339At first, I thought the surprise of Lesnar winning made for a cool moment and it did get a huge reaction and helped the TV ratings. One could argue that it could have been used for a longer cash-in story given Rollins vs. Lesnar, if that’s the direction, was logically going to happen in Saudi Arabia anyway and didn’t need the briefcase to take place. The idea is it could have been used to help someone get over. However, with the nature of Vince McMahon’s booking, it was noted that if someone like Andrade or Ricochet or Ali would have won, Vince McMahon would see it as having done something for them and then would have beaten them regularly on television, thinking he could at that point having given them that big win, and it would within weeks negate the win and perhaps end up hurting them more than helping, particularly if McMahon decided against them winning the title.
1340
1341It had been the plan since before WrestleMania for Lesnar to get his rematch with Rollins at the May Saudi Arabia show, which, of course, was then moved to 6/7. But on 5/21, they shot an angle to set up Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler on that show, so in theory that would mean Lesnar’s decision almost has to be Rollins. There’s always the possibility of a swerve.
1342
1343Ziggler was a late change from Kevin Owens, who refused to go to Saudi Arabia. The feeling is that they had nobody ready, since they didn’t want a Raw wrestler in the spot and since HHH vs. Randy Orton was already booked on the show, as was Finn Balor vs. Andrade, the only names were Owens, Elias, or Daniel Bryan (who has been moved into a tag team program and also isn’t going to Saudi Arabia). The decision was just made, since Ziggler was booked by WWE to be in Australia that weekend. WWE just pulled him from that appearance and is sending Carmella to Australia in his place.
1344
1345Bayley cashed in her briefcase immediately and ended up as Smackdown champion. It was a scenario that started when Becky Lynch retained her Raw women’s title over Lacey Evans. Evans then punched Ly ch to set up Charlotte Flair winning the Smackdown over Lynch. Flair and Evans were beating down Lynch when Bayley made the save. In the brawl, Bayley threw Flair into the turnbuckles which stunned her. Bayley cashed it in and used an elbow drop off the top rope to beat Flair and win the title in 20 seconds. In doing so, Flair captured her ninth world title in the quest for 17. The crowd went nuts for Bayley winning.
1346
1347Rey Mysterio won the U.S. title from Samoa Joe. Joe seemed to have broken his nose in the first minute from a Thesz press with Mysterio landing on his face. Joe was bleeding badly and they were told to go home. So Joe went for a power bomb and Mysterio reversed it and got the pin. Whether this was planned or not, Joe’s left shoulder was way off the mat when the ref counted three. They called attention to it like it was a planned spot. After the match, Joe gave Mysterio two uranages and Mysterio legit separated his shoulder.
1348
1349On the 5/28 Smackdown show they will make an announcement regarding the U.S. title with Mysterio ‘s injury. Mysterio was examined this week in Birmingham, AL, about possible surgery. Probably based on the diagnosis and how long he’ll be out will determine the next step with the championship.
1350
1351The show at the XL Center in Hartford drew a sellout of 10,500 fans.
1352
1353The next WWE PPV is Super Showdown on 6/7 in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia. There is less controversy because time has passed since the murder of Jamal Khashoggi.
1354
1355At press time, it has been confirmed that four performers will not be appearing on the show, Owens, Bryan, Aleister Black and Sami Zayn. It is believed they are the only four. John Cena refused to do the last show and to the best of our knowledge isn’t booked on this show. There were reports that Roman Reigns was not going to do the last show, but it never came out because he was diagnosed with a form of leukemia before the show and was out of action. Whether that was accurate at the time, Reigns, in fact, is both billed for the show and nobody internally, who knew of the other names out, were aware that anything is going to change to keep the Reigns vs. Shane McMahon match from happening.
1356
1357The reason for Bryan not going are likely the same reasons why he didn’t go to the second show, after going the first time, a decision he had made before the Khashoggi killing based on what happened at the first show.
1358
1359With Owens, company sources have said he was asked by his family not to go. Others have said there are a number of reasons, and all of the reasons speculated on were accurate. The only reason I’ve seen speculated on had to do with his close friend Sami Zayn not being allowed to go. We were told Owens asked off the show and that when he did so, they never even asked him why, gave him the show off and indicated there was no pressure on him to change his mind.
1360
1361Zayn won’t be appearing, like on the first show (he was injured for the second show), because of his Syrian ancestry, as the Saudis hate Syrians. Black not going, like with Zayn, was not his decision. We were told it had to do with tattoos he had that were religious in nature. It wasn’t made clear where the Saudis told WWE he couldn’t appear due to those tattoos, or WWE made the decision thinking the tattoos would offend the hosts.
1362
1363WWE did promote the show coming from Jeddah’s King Abdullah International Stadium, the 62,000 capacity stadium that the first major Saudi Arabia show took place in. In promoting the PPV show in the U.S., they have banned any mention of the word Saudi Arabia. Still, when the commercial for the show have aired live, they are booed.
1364
1365They are promoting the show by constantly saying it will be as big or bigger than WrestleMania.
1366
1367There are seven matches announced, which are Undertaker vs. Bill Goldberg in what is being pushed as the biggest match on the show, HHH vs. Randy Orton in a non-sanctioned match, which got a long video package this week promoting based on their long background with Evolution and various feuds in the years after, Kingston vs. Ziggler for the WWE title, Reigns vs. Shane McMahon, The Demon Finn Balor vs. Andrade for the IC title, Strowman vs. Bobby Lashley and a 50 man Battle Royal. Rollins vs. Lesnar is expected to be announced next week.
1368
13691. The Usos beat Smackdown tag champs Daniel Bryan & Rowan in a non-title match in 11:10. A good pre-show match. The finish saw Jimmy and then Jey both hit topes on Rowan. Then they started giving Rowan superkicks. Then they did a double tope on Rowan. Bryan went for a tope on all of them, but ended up hit as he went to dive by a double superkick. Then both Usos came off opposite corner with a double splash to pin Bryan. The impression was that this would lead to a title match, but with Bryan not going to the next PPV, that will likely be on television or on the Stomping Grounds show in Tacoma, where Bryan & Rowan would likely be cheered. ***1/4
1370
13712. Bayley won the Women’s Money in the Bank match over Naomi, Carmella, Natalya, Ember Moon, Mandy Rose, Nikki Cross and Dana Brooke in 13:50. Cross was a late sub for Alexa Bliss, who was pulled from the match for medical reasons. Bliss’ injury was officially not listed. Officially not listed these days usually means concussion and there have been reports that was the case. The symptoms described, having thrown up after taking a bump, is consistent with concussions. What’s concerning is that it’s at least the second one she’s had in a short period of time. This did get out as there was a late betting rush on Bayley to win. The match was sloppy and choreographed but not in a smooth choreographed way. All the women were brought back from Europe early to practice this match. Some of the stunts got over big and the second half of the match was good. The biggest spot was Moon coming off a ladder on the floor, jumping into the ring and hitting Natalya with the eclipse. Carmella did a knee injury angle early working with Mandy Rose. Carmella then came back out for the finish. Carmella seemingly had it won, climbing slowly to sell her knee, but Sonya Deville came out and pulled her down and Carmella was selling the knee again. Deville then speared Carmella. Deville put Rose on her shoulders and was climbing to the top of the ladder. When they got to the top, Bayley recovered, ran up the ladder, knocked Deville and Rose off the grabbed the briefcase to win. ***1/4
1372
1373Bayley, in her interview, brought up Sasha Banks and Banks being no Raw. Still, there’s no sign of Banks.
1374
1375The first Sami Zayn segment, with HHH was here.
1376
1377
1378---
1379
1380The next WWE PPV is Super Showdown on 6/7 in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia. There is less controversy because time has passed since the murder of Jamal Khashoggi.
1381
1382At press time, it has been confirmed that four performers will not be appearing on the show, Owens, Bryan, Aleister Black and Sami Zayn. It is believed they are the only four. John Cena refused to do the last show and to the best of our knowledge isn’t booked on this show. There were reports that Roman Reigns was not going to do the last show, but it never came out because he was diagnosed with a form of leukemia before the show and was out of action. Whether that was accurate at the time, Reigns, in fact, is both billed for the show and nobody internally, who knew of the other names out, were aware that anything is going to change to keep the Reigns vs. Shane McMahon match from happening.
1383
1384The reason for Bryan not going are likely the same reasons why he didn’t go to the second show, after going the first time, a decision he had made before the Khashoggi killing based on what happened at the first show.
1385
1386With Owens, company sources have said he was asked by his family not to go. Others have said there are a number of reasons, and all of the reasons speculated on were accurate. The only reason I’ve seen speculated on had to do with his close friend Sami Zayn not being allowed to go. We were told Owens asked off the show and that when he did so, they never even asked him why, gave him the show off and indicated there was no pressure on him to change his mind.
1387
1388Zayn won’t be appearing, like on the first show (he was injured for the second show), because of his Syrian ancestry, as the Saudis hate Syrians. Black not going, like with Zayn, was not his decision. We were told it had to do with tattoos he had that were religious in nature. It wasn’t made clear where the Saudis told WWE he couldn’t appear due to those tattoos, or WWE made the decision thinking the tattoos would offend the hosts.
1389
1390WWE did promote the show coming from Jeddah’s King Abdullah International Stadium, the 62,000 capacity stadium that the first major Saudi Arabia show took place in. In promoting the PPV show in the U.S., they have banned any mention of the word Saudi Arabia. Still, when the commercial for the show have aired live, they are booed.
1391
1392They are promoting the show by constantly saying it will be as big or bigger than WrestleMania.
1393
1394There are seven matches announced, which are Undertaker vs. Bill Goldberg in what is being pushed as the biggest match on the show, HHH vs. Randy Orton in a non-sanctioned match, which got a long video package this week promoting based on their long background with Evolution and various feuds in the years after, Kingston vs. Ziggler for the WWE title, Reigns vs. Shane McMahon, The Demon Finn Balor vs. Andrade for the IC title, Strowman vs. Bobby Lashley and a 50 man Battle Royal. Rollins vs. Lesnar is expected to be announced next week.
1395~~~~~~
13969. Chris Jericho pinned Kenny Omega in 26:35. Jericho’s ring entrance had a guy pretending to be Jericho doing a number of Jericho’s old characters like Lionheart, the list of Jericho and things like that. They had a wild brawl. Omega slammed Jericho on a desk. Omega came off the barricade with a springboard dropkick on the floor. Omega did You Can’t Escape and another missile dropkick. Omega looked to have broken his nose about seven minutes in. Omega did a snap rana and a Terminator dive into a table, landing on his tailbone on the floor. He then did a springboard double foot stomp onto the table that Jericho was buried under. Omega did a V trigger to the back of the head. He teased a full nelson superplex and ended up doing a backwards superplex. Jericho went for the lionsault but Omega got his knees up and ht a V trigger. Omega went for the One Winged Angel but Jericho escaped, used a German suplex and a lionsault to the back of the head and a second lionsault. Jericho backdropped Omega over the top rope through a table on the floor and followed with a Silver King dropkick. Omega took a great bump on the apron. Jericho tried a superplex but Omega punched him off the ropes. Omega came off the top into a codebreaker by Jericho. Omega did a series of snap dragon suplexes. He used a double arm power bomb for a near fall. Jericho blocked a V trigger and turned it into a Boston crab and then used the old verison of the liontamer. Omega escaped and threw some up kicks. He went for the One winged angel and Jericho went to counter into a DDT but it was botched. They set up going right back to the same spot, which this time went smoothly. Jericho then hit the codebreaker and a spinning elbow, called the Judas effect, for the pin. After the match, Jericho demanded that Omega tell him “Thank you” for the company and getting the TV deal which he claimed was all because of him. Moxley came out. The whole place loudly chanted “Moxley” rather than Ambrose, which tells you that this is a total and complete social media crowd with almost no WWE only fans. Moxley hit the Dirty Deeds on Jericho and then on referee Paul Turner. Omega tackled Moxley through the ropes in the Frank Shamrock/Bas Rutten fight spot. Both brawled with Moxley throwing him over the barricade. They brawled to the poker chips and Moxley hit the Dirty Deeds on top of the poker chips and gave Omega an Attitude Adjustment off the top of the poker chips onto the stage. ****1/4
1397
1398Jon Moxley, the former Dean Ambrose, will be working AEW, New Japan and some independent shows over the summer.
1399
1400Moxley’s first actual match since leaving WWE, will be against Juice Robinson for the IWGP United States Heavyweight Championship at the Best of the Super Juniors finals on 6/5 at Sumo Hall in Tokyo.
1401
1402The match will air in the U.S. on AXS TV on 6/7 in the regular Friday night New Japan time slot.
1403
1404Moxley was the mystery man being built up for a few weeks on New Japan shows as Robinson's opponent, was revealed right after Double or Nothing. It was later announced that Moxley will have other matches with New Japan as well as several matches for Northeast Wrestling over the summer.
1405
1406At this point Moxley's other NJPW matches haven't been announced. He will be able to work some dates with New Japan even after AEW starts on weekly television but AEW will have first dibs on his dates.
1407
1408Moxley, 33, will next appear for AEW at Fyter Fest on 6/29 in Daytona Beach, where he’ll face Joey Janela in his first AEW match. Tickets for that show went on sale for a second time (they had a password on sale a few weeks ago) and moved quickly. Alex Jebailey, the co-promoter of the show as part of the CEO game convention, noted that they already passed the ticket number of last year’s show they did with New Japan (about 2,500). It was unique as they only opened up a portion of the Ocean Center for the show, and sold it out instantly. Then they started opening up new sections and would sell that out, but a lot of people trying to buy tickets were told the place had sold out when there were actually thousands of seats left but not opened up. There have been more than 3,000 tickets sold, which is not an out of this world number, but it’ll probably pick up with those attending the CEO convention, which the show is aimed at, and that’s probably a gauge of what a non-traveling AEW show is going to draw before television.
1409
1410AEW officials have also confirmed Chris Jericho will be wrestling on Fight for the Fallen on 7/13 in Jacksonville.
1411
1412B/R Live, which carried Double or Nothing, is listing both events on its live sports schedule, but with no details. It is known that PPV providers, who are looking for new content with UFC pulling out of the television PPV business, as well as fighters like Canelo Alvarez and Gennady Golovkin out, and WWE still available but not doing big numbers due to the content being available cheaper on the network, is looking for more content and the Double or Nothing numbers had to shock everyone in that business. But the AEW plan was to do four PPVs per year, making them major quarterly shows that would be five hours, while the other shows would be considerably shorter. There is also no word at this point on U.K. distribution, but one would suspect Fite TV will have something to do with international iPPV distribution of those events.
1413
1414Tony Khan of AEW when noting that Moxley, the former Dean Ambrose, real name Jonathan Good, had signed a multi-year contract with the promotion, said after Double or Nothing that he would be working international dates and some independent dates. He is also doing an MMA-based movie this summer.
1415
1416Moxley's first known U.S. independent date will be against Darby Allin on 6/14 in Waterbury, CT, for Northeast Wrestling. He will also appear on June 15 in Jackson, New Jersey for the promotion at Six Flags. His major match with Pentagon Jr. will be on 8/16 in Poughkeepsie, New York on the company’s biggest show of the year, that also includes Fenix, Dustin Rhodes, LA Park, and Jerry Lawler.
1417
1418Moxley also has NEW dates on 8/17 in Norwich, CT and 8/18 in Scranton, PA. The latter date will be a singles match against Sami Callihan. That may be the extent of his matches with the promotion since we’re told there is a time line coming up when he would no longer be working independent dates, which coincides with AEW working a television schedule.
1419
1420Khan said that Moxley would be a regular with the promotion once they started television. It is believed he will only be working U.S. independent dates until AEW starts television, but would continue to work some New Japan big shows.
1421
1422It’s not confirmed whether he’ll be in the G-1 Climax tournament, but it is notable that none of his dates known at this point coincide with the G-1 schedule. On his podcast interview with Chris Jericho he talked about hitting the ground running and testing himself with different styles which felt like a hint he was doing so.
1423
1424As Moxley, Good did a lengthy podcast with Chris Jericho that was released on 5/29 which became largely the talk of the wrestling industry. Within ten hours of its release, it was the most listened to episode of Talk Is Jericho in history and was the third most listened to podcast in the country on its day of release.
1425
1426He talked for about 90 minutes mostly on his frustrations with what he believed was a broken creative process. What he said wasn’t a surprise to anyone that follows the process or talks with those in the company.
1427
1428From those in WWE, Ambrose, who often complained about his creative, was viewed as a talented guy who could get over, not the top guy, but also someone who could never be happy. Even though there were constant rumors that he really wasn’t leaving because of how hard they pushed he was leaving at certain points on television and PPV, we’d been assured that he was gone at the end of his contract. He was given a new more lucrative offer to stay, but he claimed that he never even looked at the contract or the number because he was wanting out and it wasn’t about money. He said that he’s got his truck paid for, his house paid for, his mother’s house paid for, and money isn’t what motivates him, and he wanted to be happy and creatively fulfilled.
1429
1430He did note that he’s very grateful for his eight years with the company and six plus years on the main roster. He noted he came in as a boy and left as man, came in with almost no money to his name and left with financial security. He noted that most importantly, he met his wife (Renee Young) while working for WWE.
1431
1432“I never looked at it,” he said about the contract offer to stay. “I didn’t want to. What if they offered me $10 million? What am I going to do with $10 million? My truck is paid off. My house is paid off. My mom’s house is paid off. What do I need? There is no number they could put to make me stay.”
1433
1434Jericho actually used the term Stockholm Syndrome for some of the talent there.
1435
1436He said he knew he was leaving in July 2018, while he was out of action with a torn triceps, which required surgery, and then a second surgery due to a staph infection that he called “a very miserable time” that threatened his career.
1437
1438He said at times he almost walked out, but decided he wasn’t going to quit, he wasn’t going to ask for his release and he wasn’t going to outright try and get fired. He said he wanted to do business the right way, fulfill his commitments, not make things awkward for his wife and as long as he did nothing wrong before 4/30, the last day of his contract, he would be free to work anywhere and still get all his future royalties.
1439
1440He talked about one situation after another where he’d fight to get things changed, but Vince McMahon would then put things back. He said he hated his heel run where he was making fun of the audience and doing things like putting on the gas mask and saying people smelled, he was particularly upset at them scripting him saying bad things about Roman Reigns and his leukemia to get heat. He said the trying to get heat off Reigns’ cancer was “clearly a mistake,” and blamed himself for eventually agreeing to do it, “but as soon as I said it I knew it was wrong.”
1441
1442“But Roman’s part of the story, we’ve got to make sure he’s still included,” he said McMahon told him. “He says it in a kind of innocuous way where it kind of didn’t seem so bad. Basically, he gave me the Vince Jedi mind trick.”
1443
1444“As soon as that line left my mouth, I thought, ‘Oh my God, I can’t believe I just said that.”
1445
1446In this case, he blamed himself for letting Vince convince him.
1447
1448He said there was one line about Reigns that they scripted for him that he refused to say on the air, and wouldn’t say on the air to Jericho either. He said the person who wrote the line should be ashamed, the line was so bad you can’t imagine and that the criticism would have been on him, not on Vince, if he said it.
1449
1450“I don’t know who wrote it,” he said. “I don’t know if it was Vince himself. If it was a writer and you’re listening right now, you should be ashamed of yourself. If I’d said it, it would have been on me, not Vince.”
1451
1452He said the line was so bad that in the end, if he said it, somebody would have had to have been fired and WWE could have lost sponsors.
1453
1454He said he hated the goofy character he portrayed. He said it was Royal Rumble weekend when he told Vince McMahon that he wasn’t going to sign a new deal, and the next thing you know he’s taking a bump for Nia Jax on television.
1455
1456There was a plan at first to have Ambrose wrestle Jax on a house show as an experiment, which Jax would likely win since Ambrose was leaving. The company had a policy that men could get no offense on women in physical conflict, but they changed that rule for Jax, when Randy Orton hit her with an RKO, likely with the idea that Jax, like Chyna in the past, was so big that it wasn’t the same as a 220 pound man punching a 120 pound woman. According to someone familiar with the process, there was a plan at one point to do Jax vs Ambrose on a major show. But there was the argument made that a traditional burying of a guy leaving that they would have done would have turned him into a martyr and made him a bigger star after leaving. So while he did lose over-and-over to Drew McIntyre on television, it was not the traditional burial and they even pushed a few last matches of The Shield on PPV, television and the last house show run.
1457
1458One person noted that if he had to work with Jax and put her over, it would give him great sympathy for promos he could get once leaving WWE and eventually the decision was made to have him leave while being honest ahead of time that he was leaving and not demeaning him too badly on his exit. Ambrose was also told directly that they weren’t going to bury him on the way out.
1459
1460He said that Vince McMahon takes great satisfaction is his ability to buy people and “that’s why he pays Brock Lesnar billions of dollars to ruin his company.”
1461
1462He said that he now gets to start over, like an 18-year-old in the business, except he has a name and he has experience.
1463
1464“I’m starting ahead of the game now,” he said. “It’s very exciting to be able to be a difference maker.”
1465
1466“I want to prove that your (WWE) creative process sucks. It doesn’t work. It’s absolutely terrible. I’ve said it to Vince. said it to Hunter, said it to Michael Hayes.”
1467
1468He said that the bureaucratic tape to get anything approved is crazy.
1469
1470“It doesn’t work. It’s killing the company I think and Vince is the problem. I think not so much Vince, but Vince and the structure he’s built around himself.”
1471
1472“The product sucks. Great talent, none of this is their fault. If I go with AEW we can prove Vince’s way sucks.”
1473
1474“Your creative process sucks. Change it.”
1475
1476He noted that he likes EC 3 and when EC 3 debuted, since he was leaving, they brought EC 3 in as a face and beat him quickly. The fans saw it as wrong, and at the house shows the next weekend, cheered him and booed EC 3 and got mad that he lost. So they went in reverse, turned both of them without a story, and had him beat EC 3, which pretty much killed EC 3 dead.
1477
1478He also complained that in his last match, in Moline, where they did a network special based on it being the last match of The Shield, that he main evented the show and got a $500 payoff.
1479
1480“I don’t give a shit about WWE, they’re in the past,” he said. “I hope they become good. If a byproduct of this is that they change their creative process, I’ll be happy. But I don’t care about them. I want to be the best version of myself.”
1481
1482Moxley said that he has a bunch of bucket list stuff do to before the end of the year. As noted, he never said anything about G-1, but comments indicated putting himself in the most challenging thing he could, and G-1 is considered the most challenging thing in wrestling these days.
1483
1484“I’ll put myself in uncomfortable situations and try to rise to the occasion. There are new styles to learn, new opponents to work with. I can’t wait.”
1485
1486He said he sees Tony Khan as the opposite of Vince McMahon.
1487
1488“He’s more of a wrestling fan than Vince. Vince loves sports entertainment and loves promoting. Tony is a fan of wrestling and loves to talk about it.”
1489
1490He said he was leaving whether AEW had come along or not and figured when he left at first he would wrestle in Japan and CZW, and if there were no other promotions, he still would have left, started his own wrestling school and run his own shows with his students.
1491
1492He worked with Nick Mondo to put together the “Mox” video after his contract expired and having it be released the moment he was officially a free agent. He noted that while filming it, Vince McMahon texted him at 4 a.m. Eastern time and asked him to stay an extra month and do the European tour as he wanted to build the tour around a Shield farewell.
1493
1494“I told him to call Dave (Bautista), call HHH, call Lesnar, I’m committed to a film project.”
1495
1496He said it was actually the video that he posted the moment his contract expired that became a big thing on the Internet, to reinvent himself as “Mox,” and noted he spent two days in Los Angeles putting it together at a cost of $8,000.
1497
1498“I’m a wild animal who has been domesticated for too long,” saying that he told Seth Rollins on the way out that he feels like this is the final scene of Harry and the Hendersons.
1499
1500“Nothing I do is motivated by money
1501
1502Anything I do, any project I do, I’m chasing and directed by passion, creativity, artistic satisfaction and fun. I think the rewards, monetary or otherwise, will come. It’s about becoming the best version of me.”
1503
1504WWE’s unique Super Showdown card on 6/7 in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia, is a show with a unique dream match from 20 years ago, a grudge match from 15 years ago in a country outdated by about 100 years.
1505
1506The company is pushing the show with the tag line that it will be “as big if not bigger than WrestleMania.”
1507
1508While the show will put far more money into the company’s coffers than WrestleMania, the as big or bigger likely ends there. With a show scheduled from 2-6 p.m. on a Friday afternoon, the audience watching will be minuscule in comparison and the overall interest level will likely fall well below Double or Nothing from a group that has no television.
1509
1510Currently there are nine matches announced for the show that pretty much exposes that whatever principles WWE has regarding women and minorities are for sale, admittedly, for a high price.
1511
1512There was talk in certain media places last year that Roman Reigns was not going to do the Saudi Arabia show like John Cena and Daniel Bryan in November. He ended up getting leukemia so he had bigger things on his plate and it was a decision he never had to make.’
1513
1514Based on his doing this show and comments on it, that doesn’t add up.
1515
1516For one, all along we were told the only men off the show were Bryan and Cena, who decided against going, and Zayn, who the Saudi Arabian government told WWE they didn’t want him on the show due to his ethnicity.
1517
1518By the way, you can say whatever you want about empowering women and being against racism but at the end of the day, real stands involve putting your money where your mouth is. Prejudice against ethnicity is just like skin color or any other banning of someone without any actions they have done.
1519
1520It can’t be justified and that’s the end.
1521
1522As for Reigns, he told Newsweek, “It gets a lot of mixed and negative reactions. The bottom line for me is, if we’re going to help promote change, if we’re going to set out to make an impact, then I have to be a part of it. I’m not going to sit on the sideline and talk about how we can get there. I want to be part of the action. I look at it a being part of the solution while still respecting cultures, but it’s a big world and I want to experience all of it. So if we can help make a positive impact that’s what we’re here to do. We’re here to put smiles on everyone’s faces. We don’t discriminate, that’s our goal to help and promote positivity and take that to every inch of the world.”
1523
1524I’m sorry, but yes, WWE doesn’t discriminate on their own, but based on the situation with Zayn and Black, it’s more than just doing business with people who do, which is one question and quite frankly a lot of companies do, but this is one step farther.
1525
1526It’s one to do business with those people, but this is different. This is being paid by people who are telling you that for what they pay you, you can’t hire people we don’t like, based on gender, religion or where they come from.
1527
1528This is allowing discrimination to be part of your own company and product on your own show, and you can make all the excuses you want for it, but I can’t believe that deep down people can’t see that. Anyone can talk the talk when they don’t have a hard decision to make. The test of if you’re real is if you walk the walk when you have a hard decision to make.
1529
1530They didn’t want Syrians in. They didn’t want women in. They could have easily said they didn’t want African-Americans, Canadians, Jews, Mexicans or Samoans because the principle we’re talking about is the same.
1531
1532If you really want to make change, the company should put its foot down and do what so many athletes and entertainers did a generation ago in South Africa. That’s what led to change, not taking money and going there while professing the company is behind women and against discrimination and racism.
1533
1534The lack of women proves their much-pushed Women’s Revolution, itself 50 years behind the times, is a buzzword that they won’t back up with actions. Freedom of religious thought was for sale, given Aleister Black not being allowed to go. Racism, well their Martin Luther King tributes are exposed as being convenient, but money means more, with Sami Zayn being held back.
1535
1536Or, the reality, that they have no beliefs, but profess to have them because it’s a nice marketing gimmick.
1537
1538What we’ve got instead is a show where they have banned mentions of the country it is taking place on their broadcasts. They’ll probably ban it during the show as well.
1539
1540And the biggest recipient of all this is Brock Lesnar, the highest paid pro wrestler in the history of the industry. It’s the money from Saudi Arabia that has helped pay his salary prior to the windfall coming in the fall in television money. He’s not even listed on the show, but, given he’s been on TV in recent weeks and his TV dates are planned to precede his PPV appearances, he should be there in some form.
1541
1542Instead of Seth Rollins vs. Lesnar, the official match is Rollins vs. Baron Corbin as the Universal title match with Kofi Kingston vs. Dolph Ziggler as the WWE title match.
1543
1544The remainder of the show is the largest Battle Royal in company history, with 50 men, Undertaker vs. Goldberg, HHH vs. Randy Orton, Braun Strowman vs. Bobby Lashley, Demon Finn Balor defends the IC title against Andrade, Reigns vs. Shane McMahon, and Lars Sullivan in a 1-on-3 handicap match against the Lucha House Party.
1545
1546The 2019 Best of the Super Juniors tournament comes down to undefeated Shingo Takagi vs. Taiji Ishimori in the A block championship and Will Ospreay vs. Ryusuke Taguchi in the B block championship.
1547
1548The A block finals take place on 5/31 in Ehime in a 6 a.m. Eastern time start on New Japan World. The B block finals are 6/3 in Okayama with a 5:30 a.m. start.
1549
1550Takagi, with just his match with Ishimori left in the tournament, is 8-0, while Ishimori is 7-1, with his only loss coming at the hands of Yoshinobu Kanemaru. The winner will advance to the finals, because a tie would go to Ishimori. If the match goes to a 30:00 draw, Takagi would advance.
1551
1552In the B block, Ospreay and Taguchi both go into the final night with 6-2 records. Ospreay, who has pretty much proven to be the best singles wrestler in the world based on having nightly incredible matches here, has lost to El Phantasmo and Robbie Eagles. Taguchi’s losses have come to Bandido and Eagles.
1553
1554A draw with Ospreay and Taguchi would necessitate some sort of a sudden death type match because there would have to be a winner, unless they’d do a three-way final.
1555
1556Eagles and Phantasmo were both alive, and Eagles had the tiebreaker advantage on both Ospreay and Taguchi, but lost to Bandido on 5/30 in Osaka to eliminate himself. Phantasmo was eliminated by Taguchi in the main event of that show.
1557
1558Takagi and Ishimori clinched going to the finals in matches on 5/29 in Nagoya. Takagi already clinched his berth before the last day, but Ishimori needed a win over Tiger Mask.
1559
1560The tournament final takes place on 6/5 at Sumo Hall in Tokyo at 5:30 a.m. on a show that also includes the return of Hiroshi Tanahashi, facing Jay White, and the debut of Jon Moxley, facing Juice Robinson in a U.S. title match.
1561
1562Dragon Lee will then face the tournament winner at Dominion on 6/9 at Osaka Jo Hall in a 3 a.m. Eastern start for what is traditionally New Japan’s second biggest event of the year. Tickets are expected to sell out for the show even though only three matches are official, which are Kazuchika Okada vs Chris Jericho for the IWGP heavyweight title, Kota Ibushi vs. Tetsuya Naito for the IC title and Taichi vs. Tomohiro Ishii for the Never title.
1563
1564
1565
1566
1567~~~~~
1568June 10, 2019 
1569Wrestling Observer Newsletter
1570
1571PO Box 1228, Campbell, CA 95009-1228 ISSN10839593 May 27, 2019
1572
1573 
1574
1575WWE MONEY IN THE BANK POLL RESULTS
1576
1577Thumbs up 167 (58.8%)
1578
1579Thumbs down 45 (15.8%)
1580
1581In the middle 72 (25.4%)
1582
1583 
1584
1585BEST MATCH POLL
1586
1587Seth Rollins vs. A.J. Styles 244
1588
1589Men’s MITB match 25
1590
1591Bayley vs. Charlotte 13
1592
1593 
1594
1595WORST MATCH POLL
1596
1597Shane McMahon vs. The Miz 69
1598
1599Roman Reigns vs. Elias 67
1600
1601Becky Lynch vs. Lacey Evans 32
1602
1603Rey Mysterio vs. Samoa Joe 28
1604
1605Tony Nese vs. Ariya Daivari 13
1606
1607Becky Lynch vs. Charlotte 9
1608
1609Based on phone calls and e-mails to the Observer as of Tuesday, 5/21.
1610
1611
1612----
1613
1614With less than a day to go before WWE’s Super Showdown in Jeddah, Saudi Arabia, there is a story which for long-term news and propaganda purposes makes the first and probably last Undertaker vs. Bill Goldberg mach seem like nothing.
1615
1616Last year, WWE embarked on the ten-year deal with Saudi Arabia, which. At the time, was, with the exception of U.S. television deals over the last half dozen years, it was the biggest money deal the company had ever signed for anything. The WWE announced one show a year, which became two both of which generate more money each for the company than the biggest WrestleMania in history.
1617
1618Of course in doing so, there were ugly truths and got uglier. WWE has tried to promote women as equal to men and as legitimate in-ring competitors after generations of them being either a side show, or a T&A product masquerading as wrestling. WWE has tried to get rid of the ugly stereotypes that the industry had until the recent generation, from savage Islanders to German Nazis to bald-headed Russians, salt throwing Japanese and other foreigner who are there to put down Americans. And don’t get us started with Mexican landscapers and the wonderful track record with pretty much any ethnicity that be exploited by ugly stereotypes.
1619
1620The company clung to Martin Luther King. Made the broadcast desk this weird affirmative action platform with a steady stream of bad commentators put there because of gender or race as opposed to ability. But with so much money in their face, they, without even debating, threw it away. Well, actually, they didn’t. The goal was to have their cake and eat it to. They still build one Raw a year around Martin Luther King Jr., spout on about being at the forefront of a women’s cultural evolution that they’re actually more than 50 years behind tennis, basketball, skating and pretty much every sport on.
1621
1622While at the same time, they made this deal. Worse, last year, the same government they made the deal with lured in a reporter for the Washington Post in a planned out murder. Now, the reporter wouldn’t come to their country after they kept trying to entice him. But they got him to their embassy in Turkey, and then not just killed him, but dismembered him first.
1623
1624This was, of course, inconvenient timing for WWE. It wasn’t fair. Why should we suffer on a deal we already made just because it was a deal with murderers who culture goes against pretty much everything we cling to in our home market propaganda.
1625
1626Granted, the second show was no longer the paid for propaganda piece of the first. Things are a little more calm now.
1627
1628No senators are telling them they shouldn’t go. The murder was months ago. While some companies pulled out of doing business with them, most didn’t. Although its laughable the idea that Starbucks opening stores in a country is compared with a deal by the guy who from all evidence plotted and then attempted to cover up the murder. Did Starbucks, in exchange, have Saudi Arabian propaganda all over their U.S. stores and having signs everywhere telling people how progressive the new leadership in Saudi Arabia is?
1629
1630Sometime in the ten-year deal, WWE was going to get another bragging point. At some point in the next ten years, women would be allowed to wrestle on a show. WWE has already promoted hard having this breakthrough in Abu Dhabi as being of some cultural significance, touting a very light chant of “this is hope” as a key line for years in company speeches. Keep in mind that TNA had a women’s match years earlier, so it wasn’t a breakthrough at all. And it’s hardly a culture change.
1631
1632But, for real, there will be a time, and it may even be on 6/7, that WWE does host the first women’s pro wrestling match in Saudi Arabia. Natalya and Alexa Bliss are in Saudi Arabia as of this writing.
1633
1634WWE will take credit for changing culture. Of course, that’s silly. There are women competing in sports at schools (only in private schools, so rich has its privilege but two years ago women in public schools were allowed to at least take P.E. classes). Until last year, women were prohibited from attending any events in most stadiums. Last year that changed, although they are allowed at shows like this, although it is segregated seating. Somehow I don’t think the female Sputnik Monroe is coming from WWE to modernize this and change society, but we shall see.
1635
1636Women’s basketball competition dates back to 2003.
1637
1638By the way, it was outside forces that have led to changes for women in Saudi Arabia.
1639
1640It wasn’t WWE, it was the IOC. You know how they did it? Before the 2012 Olympics, they told Saudi Arabia that if you don’t have a women’s team, your men’s team is banned from competing. Suddenly, there were women, at least in certain social circles, allowed to compete in sports, private school were allowed sports teams and they’ve sent women to the last two Olympics.
1641
1642Going there, taking the money, and waiting as is going on at this writing for the government to decide what it’s going to do hardly qualifies. Still, will WWE at some pont, maybe next week, talk about its influence more than you ever heard watching the last two Olympics? Yes.
1643
1644So here’s the situation. At one point, evidently the government told WWE that they would allow them to have a women’s bout on the 6/7 show in Jeddah, which is a more progressive city than Riyadh, likely the home of the November show.
1645
1646That may explain why there is no All-women’s PPV show on the 2019 schedule after how successful, at least aesthetically, the first show was.
1647
1648But it’s gone back-and-forth. WWE never spoke a word about it, because it would be an embarrassment if they promoted it and then got the thumbs down when they arrived. But now, it’s still going to be tough. The news is out that Natalya and Bliss are in Saudi Arabia with the idea of doing a match. There is no confirmation such a match will or won’t take place. The company has hinted about it in case it doesn’t. But if it doesn’t, the company does look bad because at that point they would have been strung along, and then told no. For that reason, if Saudi Arabia looks at the big picture and doesn’t want to embarrass WWE, they need to allow it. They care enough about not embarrassing WWE that they allowed them to do the second show without spouting the propaganda that the relationship was built on in the first place.
1649
1650Even now, WWE has promoted the show, constantly talking about how it is as big or bigger than WrestleMania, using the city “Jeddah,” but banning the term Saudi Arabia from its own television. Of course that term isn’t banned with all the localized promos the wrestlers have done for that market.
1651
1652Really, there’s no reason women shouldn’t be allowed on the show. The IOC forced them to allow women to compete in sports. The Russian circus came to town and for whatever reason, they were allowed to have their women perform in tight outfits. Of course, that led to a conservative backlash and the people who okayed that ended up it hot water over it. Mariah Carey performed there on 1/31, and was heavily criticized for doing so, more covered up than se would be at a U.S. concert, but still flashingly dressed. Actually most of the criticism of her came from Saudi Arabian women, who felt a star of her stature shouldn’t endorse and do the bidding of a government that treats women the way they do. Unlike Carey, WWE is way below the line that people in the U.S., or Saudi Arabia, would care. And it was believed the government brought in Carey specifically to rebuild its image after the Khashoggi murder.
1653
1654It will be a ten or 11 match show, with Natalya vs. Bliss as the question mark.
1655
1656While the show is listed for a 2 p.m. Eastern start, the first match, the Usos vs. The Revival, will likely go into the ring about 30 minutes earlier, during the pre-show, so it’s likely a four-and-a-half hour show.
1657
1658~~~~
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1679Transcript of AVGN episode Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles
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1685MV5BZTRiY2U0YWEtNTE2ZC00OGJiLThlNmEtODRjZjVkMmM1ZTZiXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMTQzMjU1NjE@. V1 
1686Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - NES - Angry Video Game Nerd - Episode 5
1687Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - NES - Angry Video Game Nerd - Episode 5
1688
1689The original Ninja Turtles is one of the most annoying games I've ever played. You first play it and think: "Well, this can't be too bad. The control's decent, it's fun killing things, the sound effects are cool." You may even think I'm tryin' to compare it to the sequels, which are far superior. Two-player, arcade action, beat up a bunch of Foot Soldiers. Good stuff. But, this first one is garbage. And you may be like, you know, "Come on, it's the first of its kind, be easy on it." But, no. It sucks. It sucks ass from a straw. And you wanna know why? Well... where do I begin?
1690
1691That beeping sound when you're low on energy? I mean, that's so annoying! Now look at that! Now, how the hell am I supposed to get up there? That's impossible! And who is that guy with the chainsaw anyway? Remember him from Ninja Turtles? I sure don't. The only way I can get up there is with Donatello, the turtle with the longest weapon.
1692
1693(The Nerd sighs.)
1694
1695C'mon, get over here, you fuck nut. Alright. Okay, all of that just for a pizza? Pizza shit!
1696
1697Okay, here's a trick I think everybody knows. When you're fighting Rocksteady, you jump up onto these crates with Donatello and you just keep hitting him with your bo. Now what's really weird is the timing. I mean, you have to hit him when he's sorta ducking, not when he's standing up. I guess that would make too much sense, so it's obviously a game flaw.
1698
1699Then there's that level where you have to save the dam. April O'Neil says: "You have my support." Okay. What the Hell did she ever do for you? Stupid banana raincoat wearin' bitch. So you have to swim around and deactivate all these bombs. And there's so many things out there to kill you, and you have a time limit, so, naturally, you're rushing to make it through as fast as you can. And all these electric plants hurt you, so you need a lot of patience. But how could you have patience when you're in a fuckin' hurry? FUCK!
1700
1701Level 3 is like a maze. You're in the Turtle Van goin' around, and there's steamrollers comin' at you from everywhere. And you know what I always thought was really weird? Why does the Turtle Van have the same energy bar as the turtle that you have selected? Like, shouldn't it have its own since it's, like, the vehicle and not... you know, the turtle? Never mind.
1702
1703So here's a pop quiz: Who were the target audience for this game? Kids. Kids who were fans of Ninja Turtles. Now, you think they would've actually have put more Ninja Turtle characters in the game? Like, uh, Baxter Stockman, the Rat King, Krang?
1704
1705I mean, it's not like Krang was, like, a minor character that came in the fifth season of the show. Krang was right there from the beginning. So, like, there's no excuse. There was no excuse not to have him there. I mean, instead, make way for, uh, the missile balloons, flying robot heads, those little butterfly things, Mr. Fire Man.
1706
1707(The Nerd takes a sip of Rolling Rock.)
1708
1709And... why don't you hear the Ninja Turtles theme song anywhere in the game? What a piece of shit.
1710
1711You know what I hate? The fuckin' jumps in the sewer. If your accuracy is slightly off, you're goin' down. So you really gotta take your time and watch what's comin' up. Ughhh, you son of a fuck! And you know what pisses me off? They're turtles, for fuck's sakes! They can't even swim?
1712
1713Now look at this shit right here! These spike walls come out at you like an Indiana Jones booby trap, and some game designer who's laughin' their ass off just decided to put a pizza down there. Okay, well, what's the point? I mean, are you gonna be suicidal enough to go and try to get that pizza? I mean, who's gonna do that? It's impossible. What a joke!
1714
1715And speakin' of hard-to-reach pizzas, look at this! Come on! Augh, you fuck rat! This is just a bunch of cock-a-dookie, this is bullfuck. Jesus Christ Almighty. Holy shit! Fuck! Oh my god. Oh, man. Why is this game so hard? It's for kids! Have mercy!
1716
1717And why does this jump have to be so close to the ceiling? Fuck this game! And you know what pisses me off? Every time you fall down, you have to walk through the entire room all over again. All the enemies come back, so you have to fight everybody all over again. Now, if you get the pizza, the pizza doesn't come back, only the bad guys. What a shitload of fuck!
1718
1719I mean, you can't even develop a strategy because the enemies keep changing. It's completely random. I can't get over this fucking jump. If only those two extra platforms weren't there, it wouldn't be a problem. God! Can I get up? Can I get up? No! God-fuckin'-damn, get the fuck up there! Get up there! Fuck! Whoa dude, this game's, like, a total bummer. What a joke! Fuck! (walks over the small gap) Wait, you can just walk over it? You can just... walk over it.
1720
1721(The Nerd sighs.)
1722
1723You are scum.
1724
1725(The Nerd starts drinking a bottle of Rolling Rock.)
1726
1727Cowabunga... Cow-a-FUCKIN' PIECE OF DOGSHIT! This game is diarrhea comin' outta my dick! This game is as appealing as a fuckin' ooze-infested dirty fuckin' sewer rat shit! I've had more fun playing with dog turds! Shredder's my ass and Splinter's my balls! This game is an inside-out asshole regurgitating putrid anal fecal matter! I'd rather fuckin' yank all the hairs out of my scrotum! I'd rather drink diarrhea vomited out of a buffalo's anus! It suckin' fucks, it fuckin' sucks, IT FUCKIN' BLOWS, IT'S A PIECE OF SHIT... and I don't like it.
1728
1729Categories:
1730TranscriptsTranscripts of 2006 Angry Video Game Nerd episodes
1731Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.
1732Recent Wiki Activity
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1734Gokucock • 2 days ago
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1738FrankRTWiw • 4 days ago
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1791
1792And speakin' of hard-to-reach pizzas, look at this! Come on! Augh, you fuck rat! This is just a bunch of cock-a-dookie, this is bullfuck. Jesus Christ Almighty. Holy shit! Fuck! Oh my god. Oh, man. Why is this game so hard? It's for kids! Have mercy!
1793
1794
1795(The Nerd starts drinking a bottle of Rolling Rock.)
1796
1797Cowabunga... Cow-a-FUCKIN' PIECE OF DOGSHIT! This game is diarrhea comin' outta my dick! This game is as appealing as a fuckin' ooze-infested dirty fuckin' sewer rat shit! I've had more fun playing with dog turds! Shredder's my ass and Splinter's my balls! This game is an inside-out asshole regurgitating putrid anal fecal matter! I'd rather fuckin' yank all the hairs out of my scrotum! I'd rather drink diarrhea vomited out of a buffalo's anus! It suckin' fucks, it fuckin' sucks, IT FUCKIN' BLOWS, IT'S A PIECE OF SHIT... and I don't like it.
1798
1799
1800~~~~~~
1801
1802The Nerd: (sighs) Wow. It's like you get to play the games on a CD! Check out the graphics! Full motion video, opposed to video that isn't full motion! 64 simultaneous colors! 12.5 MHz processor! Holy shit! This thing is total FUCKIN' GARBAGE! How would you like it if I conduct the rest of the video like this? (Screen becomes smaller and the video choppier, like the Sega CD's "FMV.") "Full motion video", my ass! I'd rather be full fuckin' screen!
1803
1804he Nerd: Now we got Sol-Feace. More like Sol-Feces! Well, holy shit, I gotta be honest. It reminds me of R-Type or LifeForce, and that's pretty cool, so all I gotta say is, this one's not bad.
1805
1806The Nerd: The Terminator. This one's okay, too. I mean, there were some flaws. For example, the enemies are too strong, which is fine, but it's annoying when every single thing you try to blow up takes so much gunfire. Even when you're in the present time, there's no bad guys that die with one shot. And I understand when you're shootin' the Terminators; they're made of metal, but these are human beings. Another thing really annoying is how difficult it can be to shoot things sometimes. I can't stand still when I'm on the stairs. You can't aim your gun without moving all around. One thing I have to say, the music's awesome. Overall, this game's okay.
1807
1808~~~~
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1829Transcript of AVGN episode Silver Surfer
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1835MV5BOTVhMWY1ZDAtYmY5YS00ODE1LThjMWMtM2YzMGM2N2FmNzI4XkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMTQzMjU1NjE@. V1 
1836Silver Surfer - NES - Angry Video Game Nerd - Episode 27
1837Silver Surfer - NES - Angry Video Game Nerd - Episode 27
1838
1839The Nerd: Alright, this is Silver Surfer. Silver SHIT! (inserts game into NES and turns it on) He looks so stupid! I mean, what the Hell's wrong with him? He's just like... like... (The Nerd tries to imitate Silver Surfer's pose.)
1840
1841(Stage select screen appears)
1842
1843The Nerd: Alright, so you get this stage select thing, kinda like in Mega Man, which is good for the sake of this review, so I don't really have to beat anything to show you all the stages in the game.
1844
1845(Game starts)
1846
1847The Nerd: So it's just like one of those fly-and-shoot games, kinda like Defender or LifeForce, you know. Nothin' too special, but, not bad, actually. Your weapon's kinda lame, but there's power-ups which let you shoot double. (Silver Surfer dies from touching the wall) ...the fuck? I can't touch the walls? That's right. You can't touch anything in this game, so don't fuck around.
1848
1849The Nerd: Anyway, what was I saying about the weapons? Oh yeah, th-there's-there's not much else I think you can get. I mean, you can shoot backwards, like if somebody's comin' behind you, and that's always a real shit-sucker 'cause you wanna concentrate on what's ahead. It's kinda clumsy to switch back, because you press the B button to change direction, but use A to shoot. (Silver Surfer falls) Ah, fuck! I guess that wasn't a good time to demonstrate.
1850
1851The Nerd: So there you go, shootin' the rubber ducky, which doesn't die. (Silver Surfer dies) OH, FUCK! If you play this game, one thing I can guarantee, is that your thumb is gonna get pretty damn sore from tapping that button. There's not one instant when you can take a break. You're constantly firing away, even when there's nothing in sight, because you don't know what's coming up. I mean there's no reason not to be shooting, and this wouldn't bother me so fuckin' much if you could just hold down the button and let it keep shooting, but no. Of course not. So what you need, is a turbo button. Whether it's an NES Advantage or an NES Max, put that other fuckin' controller away, press that turbo button, and never let go.
1852
1853The Nerd: So I beat the stage, though each stage consists of two or more sections. Now we're in the second section, and we got an overhead view which is equally as difficult as any of the rest. Actually I think they're worse, because you don't know what's supposed to be underneath you or blocking you. I'm assuming I can't touch these wooden parts. Uh-oh, now I'm probably fucked... (Silver Surfer goes through) Oh, never mind, I guess I can go through those. See, the graphics are so unclear as to what you're allowed to touch and what you're not. You don't know what the hazards are. (Silver Surfer gets killed by an almost-invisible bullet) Look at that. That's not fair. I couldn't see that tiny bullet comin' through the trees. It's like camouflaged. And the way those waves move, it's just like a bunch of flickering blue lines. It plays with your eyes and fucks you all up. What a cruel game.
1854
1855The Nerd: I give up. I'm tryin' another stage: Fire Lord. Alright, another overhead. (Silver Surfer dies from touching the ground) Ah, FUCK! I can't believe this. You can't touch the ground. That means that you have to stay in the brown area, which pretty much limits you to about 20% of the screen. This is ridiculous, just stayin' within this narrow range. It's like playing the game Operation, but with a bunch of shit flyin' around tryin' to kill you. You have such a tight space to maneuver if you wanna kill these things. Come on, come on! (exclaims and shakes head) Let's try again. Come on, come on! OH, FUCK! (Silver Surfer crashes into the side, killing him) If only his board wasn't so goddamn long! Or if you can go diagonally, like if you can go at an angle, but you're always pointing straight, which makes it impossible to squeeze through narrow spots like this.
1856
1857The Nerd: You know, it's so easy to die in this game, and every time you die, you have to see this. (Game over screen with Silver Surfer bent over and crying in sad surrender) This sad, pathetic image of Silver Surfer just trembling in defeat. If you play this game, this image will be burned into your retina. And how appropriate, because this picture expresses better than words my feelings on this game. Just look at it. That sums up the whole thing.
1858
1859The Nerd: What'd I say before? This game's not bad? Well, no. It isn't bad. It's FUCKIN' HORRIBLE! And I dare you to play it. Just because it's hard doesn't mean it's bad, but this game just went way, WAY too far. The difficulty is legendary. This is the grand champion of hard motherfuckin' games. It doesn't fuck around. Why couldn't there be a health bar, like three hits? Would that be okay? No. One fuckin' hit, and you're dead. Well, then couldn't you have extra lives? Which you do, but they don't matter because when ya die, you start back from the beginning of the stage. There's some checkpoints along the way, yeah, but that doesn't change the fact that when you die, you go back. Compare that to Contra or Super C. You get hit once and you're dead, but, you get to continue where you left off. You don't have to start at the beginning of the stage unless you lost all your lives. If that happened, even your 30-life code wouldn't help much. Silver Surfer, on the other hand, just says "Fuck all that! If you're gonna play, you gotta be hardcore!"
1860
1861The Nerd: So now we're in Fire Lord, section 2. Whoa, watch the fire, OH, SHIT! (Silver Surfer gets killed by a pumpkin) Fuckin'... jack-o'lanterns? Alright, let's try again. Dodge the fire, stay up and watch the jack-o'lanterns, oh, better watch that thing, oh God, I gotta go down! OH, FUCK! Your mother.
1862
1863The Nerd: Fire's comin' down. Got that part under control. Watch the jack-o'lanterns. (Silver Surfer crashes into the ceiling) Fuck! Touched the damn ceiling. Fire's comin' down. Jack-o'lanterns, oh, oh, ugh! ASS! Alright, this time, tryin' to shoot those fuckin' jack-o'lanterns. Stay back, back, back, ugh! Oh! God! Alright, gettin' into place, watch the walls, (Silver Surfer gets killed by another pumpkin) ah, you FUCKIN' PUMPKIN PIECE OF SHIT! OK, this time, stay at the top. Don't get hit, don't get hit. Get under that thing, here we go, get-yes! Yes! Yes! (He accidentally presses left, which leads to Silver Surfer getting killed by yet another pumpkin) (Yells) NO!
1864
1865The Nerd: I can't take it anymore. (Drinks some Yuengling) You know... there's really no point of going on. It's not like there's a reward, like there's a pot of gold sittin' on top of the TV. You know if you beat the game, it probably just says "The End", and that's it. So to keep playing it, you gotta be a fuckin' nerd. (Continues to play game)
1866
1867The Nerd: Alright, gotta watch out for these... statues puking lava. (Silver Surfer gets killed by a pumpkin) God! ANOTHER motherfuckin' pumpkin. There's so many obstacles, it's unbeliev- (touches red pot and dies) I CAN'T TOUCH THAT RED POT?! (it appears that he got hit by lava right at the moment he touched the pot) Alright, that's where I give up.
1868
1869The Nerd: Let's try another stage. I figure I gotta be able to beat at least one of 'em. Now this is really a bitch. I mean, all these ghouls comin' at me. They got bats, jack-o'lanterns, and now ghosts? It's like another Kindergarten Halloween game. They should've just called it: whatever. (BOO! HAUNTED HOUSE!) This is just insane, I mean, look at all this! Oh my God! So much shit, so much shit! Here we go! Oh yeah! (Silver Surfer crashes into a wooden log) Oh, God! I... touched the log?
1870
1871The Nerd: You fuckin' ghosts! You fuckin' motherfuckin' pieces of shit! UGH! God, I hate those gargoyles! They just... shit all over the place! I hate it. I just fuckin' hate it. Look at this. This pattern is just insane; it's basically just a bunch of lines wavin' across the screen. And if you go anywhere near those paths, you're dead.
1872
1873The Nerd: Once again, let's try another stage: Possessor. Well, it's... not any easier, especially when I'm losin' my patience. And look at this. There's so much stuff comin' at ya. Bullets are flyin' everywhere. Ugh! Let's pause this. Just look, look. (Red waves appear on the screen) Any of these areas are dead zones. You have stuff comin' at you every which way, which means there's not one safe spot because you need to keep moving forward. So you're in danger's way all the time. You just have to play the shit out of it until you know in advance exactly what's gonna happen.
1874
1875The Nerd: Unless you've played this game, you have no idea how hard it is. Let me try to explain it, okay? Imagine if I were to draw a maze on a sheet of paper. I'm asking you to draw a line from the beginning of this maze to the end. You can't run into any dead ends, and you can't touch any of the lines. Now, while you're tryin' to do this, I'm moving the maze to the left. It would drive you fuckin' nuts. And if that's a bit too theoretical to accept, then let me explain it this way: imagine playing Mega Man 2.
1876
1877(Shows game footage from "Mega Man 2")
1878
1879The Nerd: Imagine you have no health bar. Imagine if you get hit one single fucking time, you're dead. And is that fair? It's challenging, yes. But, it's not to say that unless you're a hardcore expert, you're gonna take a few hits sooner or later. Now, I'm not done. Imagine on top of that, multiply the number of enemies on the screen, and give them more hit points. (Shows game footage from "The Legend of Zelda" on NES) Imagine if you were playin' Zelda and you weren't allowed to get hit once, or touch any of the walls or blocks.
1880
1881The Nerd: I mean this game just pukes snot up my ass. (Silver Surfer dies repeatedly) It's like you touch the top of the building, you die, you touch the ceiling, you die, you touch the floor, you die, too far to the right, you die, too far to the left, you die, you die, you die, you die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, DIE! (lies on the floor, holds his eyes in anger, and mimics the game over screen) (upset voice) Oh, God, I can't fuckin' stand it.
1882
1883The Nerd: (Sighs) One last stage, and I'm sure it's no exception to the difficulty. You're just tryin' to avoid this stuff that's comin' sideways, and then this gun appears at the top of the screen with no warning and shoots in three directions. Instant death. If you try to blast it away as soon as it appears, you just end up getting yourself killed too, because you need to be in the line of fire in order to shoot at it. Sometimes, you come to like a blockade of enemies, just a flood of bullets comin' down the whole screen. It's just one big dead zone. If you're in that area, YOU'RE SIMPLY DEAD! So fuck it! I can't complete a single stage!
1884
1885The Nerd: This game is so hard, it would actually be easier to go outside in a thunderstorm and try to dodge rain. It would be easier to walk barefoot, without your toes or heels touching the floor. It'd be easier to pick fly shit out of pepper... while wearing boxing gloves! The fact you can get hit only once, pretty much means that you're weaker than every other enemy in the game. HOW DO YOU DIE FROM JUST TOUCHING A WALL?!
1886
1887The Nerd: I can understand if he's flying at like 200 miles per hour and he crashes into the wall, but the fact that he just touches the wall and dies, is just ridiculous. I never read any of the comics, so I don't know what Silver Surfer's powers are, but isn't he supposed to be pretty strong? So why'd they make him into a wimp?! Why is he fuckin' up rubber ducks and weepin' like a crybaby? It's like some sort of fuckin' joke! Like what if they had Bruce Lee tripping over his own shoelaces? It's a fuckin' insult! This game should've been classic! But instead, it's worthless! It's as worthless as this fuckin' LJN poster I have back here! Man, I would just piss and shit all over this fuckin' game! In fact, JUST THINKING ABOUT IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE HAVIN' AN ANAL EVACUATION! (Swigs some Yuengling) Fuck...! (Gets up, takes game out, and then throws it to the wall in rage.)
1888
1889(Credits roll, after which the GameTrailers logo appears)
1890
1891The Nerd: ASSSS!
1892
1893Trivia
1894Sometime after the Nerd uses the NES Max, it is revealed that he is using the normal NES controller again.
1895You can tell what scenery parts can kill you by shooting at them. Projectiles will be stopped by actual obstacles.
1896Categories:
1897TranscriptsTranscripts of 2007 Angry Video Game Nerd episodes
1898Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.
1899Recent Wiki Activity
1900Mike Matei
1901Gokucock • 2 days ago
1902List of Angry Video Game Nerd Adventures Hazards and Enemies
1903Prabowo Muhammad • 3 days ago
1904Transcript of AVGN Episode Universal Studios Theme Parks Adventure
1905FrankRTWiw • 4 days ago
1906James & Mike Mondays
1907HorrorFan01 • 4 days ago
1908
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1957Follow Fandom Wikis on TwitterJokeyPsychEndgameHonestGalaxyQuest
1958
1959~~~~
1960
1961ranscript of CD-i Part 2 | Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki ...avgn.fandom.com › wiki › Transcript_of_CD-i_Part_2
1962(The Nerd looks at the screen in utter horror.) ... The music's pretty cool, and the graphics are nice and colorful. ... But lemme tell ya what kinda mixed bag.
1963
1964Transcript of AVGN Episode Zelda II | Angry Video Game Nerd ...avgn.fandom.com › wiki › Transcript_of_AVGN_Episode_Zelda_II
1965But it's a mixed opinion kind of thing, some people love it, some people hate it. The Nerd: With ... Everything looks like a block, Link is so miniscule and looks like a little gnarled green turd. But also he ... That's right, Link's collects bags of piss.
1966
1967~~~~
1968
1969
1970GAMES
1971MOVIES
1972TV
1973VIDEO
1974WIKIS
1975Search
1976START A WIKI
1977Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki
1978Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki
1979592
1980PAGES
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1982POPULAR PAGES
1983COMMUNITY
1984EXPLORE
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1986in:
1987Transcripts of 2008 Angry Video Game Nerd episodes, Transcripts
1988Transcript of CD-i Part 2
1989EDIT
1990 
1991COMMENTS (7)
1992 
1993SHARE
1994(At the beginning of the video, a scene is shown of Omfak, a boss from “Zelda: The Wand of Gamelon”, exploding into a burst of gray birds)
1995
1996Zelda: Got ‘em!
1997
1998(The Nerd looks at the screen in utter horror.)
1999
2000639991
2001Title card for episode.
2002
2003CD-I (Part 2) Zelda Wand of Gamelon - Angry Video Game Nerd - Episode 60
2004CD-I (Part 2) Zelda Wand of Gamelon - Angry Video Game Nerd - Episode 60
2005
2006(The Nerd's theme song plays.)
2007
2008The Nerd: I have been dreading this day for a long time. It’s time to play the Zelda CD-i games. Now the first two, Link: The Faces of Evil and Zelda: [The] Wand of Gamelon, were both released on the same day: October 10, 1993. You can think of 'em as brother and sister game(s). I’m gonna try out Wand of Gamelon first.
2009
2010The Nerd: To begin with, I thought this might’ve been an interesting game, because ya actually play as Zelda. Y'know, the one who’s in the title of every Zelda game? (A selection of "Zelda" games are shown) Also it’s a side-scroller, much like in Zelda II: The Adventure of Link. I’ve always wondered why Nintendo never made any more Zelda games in this style. So going into this game, I couldn’t imagine how bad it would be. Link is seen only in these infamous cartoon cutscenes.
2011
2012Zelda: Link, go to Gamelon, and find my father.
2013
2014Link: Great! I can’t wait to bomb some Dodongos!
2015
2016The Nerd: God! Way more corny than the Link from the TV series. (The logo for the "Legend of Zelda" TV series is shown.) But these scenes are only the icing on the shitcake.
2017
2018Impa: (yawns) Alright, dear.
2019
2020The Nerd: The first thing I find kinda disappointing is the instruction manual. Countin' the English section, it’s only ten pages. All you get is a very brief storyline and bland descriptions. If ya look at the original Nintendo manual, look at how elaborate and colorful it is!
2021
2022The Nerd: Let’s talk about the controls. Regardless of which controller ya have, it seems the CD-i only uses two buttons. So to jump, ya have to press Up. Being that it’s a platform game and a lot of the jumps have to be done with perfect accuracy, it wears on your thumb real fast. And sometimes when I’m tryin' to press left or right, I end up jumping by accident.
2023
2024The Nerd: The first button is the sword. The second button is everything else: opening doors, bringing up the status screen, and using an item. It’s a fuckin' mess, and it causes nothing but problems. To bring up the status screen, you have to crouch down and hit the button. To begin with, that’s a pain in the ass. But if you’re in front of a door and push the button, you end up going through the door, regardless of whether you’re standing or crouching. So if you wanna bring up the status screen, you gotta stay away from the doors. Also, the status screen is the only way you can pause the game. Sometimes I forget or don’t realize I’m in front of a door, so I try to bring up the status screen and then I get up to take a piss only to realize that I’m in another room getting my ass handed to me! (Zelda gets hit by some enemies)
2025
2026The Nerd: The problem also works the other way around. If you’re tryin' to go in the door, you have to be certain that you’re standing right in the middle, or else ya end up using your item. I’ve wasted so many bombs just tryin' to go in the damn doors.
2027
2028The Nerd: And you wanna know what I fuckin' hate? To collect Rupees or anything, you have to stop and hit ‘em with your sword. And you can’t be standing in front of them either; you have to be in the right position. There’s no other way! You don’t have to do that in any other Zelda game! You see a Rupee, all you need to do is touch it. (Link picks up a Rupee.)
2029
2030The Nerd: But in this piece of shit, every single Rupee slows ya down. Most of the time I ignore them, but as it turns out, you NEED Rupees more than ever in this game! Many of the items that ya use take Rupees away when ya use them, and you constantly need to buy bombs, lantern oil and ropes. The bombs are for killing tough enemies and blowing your way into certain places ya need to go. (Zelda repeatedly throws bombs at a rock) Sometimes just to blow up one boulder, it takes ten bombs! Ya think that’s enough?!
2031
2032The Nerd: The lanterns are for lighting the dark areas, and let me tell ya, this game got really carried away with this. (Shows footage from the original "Zelda" game with Link going through a darkened dungeon.) It’s common in Zelda games that there’s always dark areas, usually in caves or dungeons in which ya need to light the way. But in this game, it seems every fuckin' place ya go it gets dark. Even in the treetops in broad daylight, it happens. And the lantern only lasts for a few seconds and then it goes dark again. Cut me a break! So you’re constantly switching back to the status screen to keep selecting the lantern oil. And when it runs out, being stuck in the dark is absolutely miserable. You can’t even see the fuckin' door to find your way back out!
2033
2034The Nerd: So, finding the door in the dark is a bitch, but other times the problem is tryin' to get your ass away from the door. Watch this situation. I go in the door, it’s dark. I need the lantern, so I crouch down and try to bring up the select screen, and I exit the door. What the fuck. So I go back in. This time I make more of an effort to step away from the door. I try the status screen again, and what happens? I go out the damn door. Again. So this time I go back in, I walk to the left, and finally I’m able to bring up the status screen and select the lantern.
2035
2036The Nerd: As the room illuminates, you can see how big that door was. Even if I know I’m about to step into a dark room and I select the lantern in advance, it still doesn’t make a difference because if I try to use the lantern while I’m touching the door, I’ll have the same problem. It would’ve really helped if all that shit didn’t have to be the same button.
2037
2038The Nerd: I know I’m digging deeper and deeper into the same topic, but it really is a continuous problem. It can even get ya killed! Say I go into a dark room. I step away from the door, and I fall. (Zelda dies, and a yellow arrow points to where she fell) How was I supposed to know there was a crevice there?! All because I can't use the lantern at the door! It's FUCKIN' BULLSHIT!
2039
2040The Nerd: But now that I’ve discussed all the problems with using the lantern in the dark rooms, let’s talk about the ropes. You use them for climbing all those tough-to-reach platforms. But why you can only use a rope one time makes no sense. Why does Zelda have to carry around 20 fuckin' ropes? Why can’t she use the same one?
2041
2042The Nerd: And if ya die, you go back to the beginning of the stage, so you’re constantly wasting your ropes. Lemme tell ya, there’s nothing more frustrating than making it to the end of the stage, then realizing you have no more ropes. So it’s back to the fuckin' store.
2043
2044The Nerd: But damn, I haven’t even started talkin' about how hard it is to maneuver. First of all, you can’t jump straight down. If you wanna go down, you have to keep following the walkway until you get to an area you can drop. This little blue guy? He’s too short to hit, and if I try to jump over him I end up back at the top. So I gotta keep walking side-to-side, just to go down.
2045
2046The Nerd: The graphics are so convoluted you can’t even tell where you can go. Look at this! What the fuck? I can’t go through! So I gotta go to the right, and then down, and then back to the left again. You just have to jump all around until you find which of the rocks you can land on. Alright, I found one right here, I just gotta... there we go. It’s hard to jump over gaps, even when it seems plain obvious. (Zelda dies by falling into the crevice) Oh, come ON! You gotta be kidding me!
2047
2048The Nerd: Sometimes a moving platform or crocodile will get in your way. (Zelda falls into the river and dies, and a yellow arrow points to the small gap in between the logs) What?! That little gap?! And sometimes if you jump on a platform, ya fall through! How in the holy mother of shit did I miss that branch?! It’s also strange to get people to talk, ya stab ‘em with your sword.
2049
2050Hungry Girl: I’d give anything for an Arpogos egg!
2051
2052Baker: My cakes will burn! (runs away)
2053
2054The Nerd: Just to hear stupid shit like that. It’s real annoying when you’re tryin' to fight enemies and there’s someone nearby, ya end up hitting 'em and making 'em talk!
2055
2056Impa: Oh, my-
2057
2058The Nerd: Constantly interrupting your fight.
2059
2060Impa: Oh, my-
2061
2062The Nerd: And why is everybody so twisted and scary?
2063
2064Fairy Dust Lady: Isn't it lovely? Bring some fairy dust and I’ll make it a magic cloak!
2065
2066(The Nerd flinches back from the screen)
2067
2068The Nerd: (uneasily) Wh-- Whoa, whoa...
2069
2070The Nerd: Attacking is awkward. It seems your sword never hits anything. Even if ya just keep swatting at the air, your enemies always seem to hit you first.
2071
2072The Nerd: You can only hit what’s directly in front of you, but it always seems enemies are comin' from high above you, or from too low. (He tries to kill ghosts that reach him from under the floor and animals that are in the floor, the latter dying at the same time as him.)
2073
2074The Nerd: I swear that more than half the enemies in this game are too short to hit. You always have to be at the precise altitude. Look at this! I can’t hit him below the branch, and I can’t hit him when I’m on the branch!
2075
2076The Nerd: How do I hit this thing?! (Grunts angrily) C'mon, you motherfucker, c'mon! (He finally kills the creature) Oh, man. Seriously, what is it with all these bats? All I’m tryin' to do is get outta the cave, but the bats keep on coming! (Zelda dies) Fuuuuuck!
2077
2078The Nerd: Then there’s this part where you walk into a room and there’s two assholes throwing spears. (Zelda dies) (Grunts) Gonna try again. If only I could get close enough...! (Zelda dies again) (Grunts angrily)
2079
2080The Nerd: As hard as it is to get close to your enemies, sometimes the problem is being too close. (A ghost chases Zelda and stays close to her, making it hard for her to kill it.) C’mon, you fuckin' piece of shit, GET OFF ME! And there’s no recovery time; they can drain all your energy in a second. (Zelda dies just by trying to escape from a Dodongo)
2081
2082The Nerd: Come on, jump over-- Fuck, I can’t believe that. And if you’re too close to the top of the screen, you can barely jump at all. (Zelda dies by being unable to jump over the tree creature on the top of the screen)
2083
2084The Nerd: Oh... my... God. Sometimes enemies don’t appear until you’re right next to them. (A knight suddenly appears and kills Zelda) Where the fuck did he come from? (A yellow arrow points towards the ceiling) Look, you can clearly see that nobody’s there, but as soon as I go up, BAM! I’m dead.
2085
2086Baker: It’s awful!
2087
2088The Nerd: But as difficult as it can be to slay the regular enemies, the boss battles are ridiculously easy if you know what weapon to use. They only take one hit! When ya kill 'em, you get these amusing cutscenes.
2089
2090(Zelda shoots a boss, Hectan, with her sword)
2091
2092Hectan: (while melting) You’ve killed me...!
2093
2094(Hectan exposes his heart)
2095
2096Zelda: (smugly) Good!
2097
2098(The Nerd laughs insanely while looking at the screen.)
2099
2100The Nerd: Good! (The Nerd laughs more insanely and gasps) You killed me! Good! (The Nerd laughs even more insanely and acts like a chicken, using his middle fingers for the wings) FUCK-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-FUCK-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-fuck-FUCK! Phew! Gotta calm down. (The Nerd drinks some Rolling Rock and inhales sharply.)
2101
2102The Nerd: Oh man, I’m goin' completely insane. But I can’t quit because I’m up to Ganon.
2103
2104Ganon: You dare bring light to my lair?! You must DIE!
2105
2106The Nerd: He looks like a joke. He makes the Ganon from the cartoon series look badass. And it’s very surreal comin' all this way to fight Ganon and then just throwin' the Wand of Gamelon at him. That’s it. One hit, he’s dead.
2107
2108Ganon: The chains! No! You haven’t seen the last of me!
2109
2110The Nerd: After you’ve killed him, they still have the nerve to have spikes falling from the ceiling. Wouldn’t that be a shame to kill Ganon, only to have a spike drop on your head? Then ya rescue the King and Link.
2111
2112Link: What happened?
2113
2114Zelda: (chuckles) Nothing Link. We were just about to have a feast.
2115
2116Link: Great!
2117
2118(The King and Zelda laugh)
2119
2120The Nerd: They all yuk it up, and everything’s fine.
2121
2122The Nerd: Well in conclusion, some might say that there are redeeming factors to this game. The music’s pretty cool, and the graphics are nice and colorful. Some might call it a mixed bag. But lemme tell ya what kinda mixed bag. It’s a trash bag that’s had a bad day. Like say your mom cleans out the cat litter. Fresh and stale doody pebbles go right in the bottom of the bag. And then your sister throws out her used tampons, and where do they go? In the same bag. And then your brother comes home, piss-ass drunk, just upchucks, pukes right into the bag!
2123
2124The Nerd: Now, I’m not tryin' to be disgusting, but that is a realistic situation, and what it all comes down to, that's a nasty bag! But I’d rather take that shit out to the garbage than deal with this piece of fuck! Fuck this game, get outta my face!
2125
2126(The Nerd tosses the game case)
2127
2128The Nerd: And you know what the worst part about it is? (He gets his bottle of Rolling Rock.) I still have two left! (He drinks the Rolling Rock.)
2129
2130See also
2131Transcript of CD-i Part 1
2132Transcript of CD-i Part 3
2133Categories:
2134Transcripts of 2008 Angry Video Game Nerd episodesTranscripts
2135Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.
2136Recent Wiki Activity
2137Mike Matei
2138Gokucock • 2 days ago
2139List of Angry Video Game Nerd Adventures Hazards and Enemies
2140Prabowo Muhammad • 4 days ago
2141Transcript of AVGN Episode Universal Studios Theme Parks Adventure
2142FrankRTWiw • 4 days ago
2143James & Mike Mondays
2144HorrorFan01 • 4 days ago
2145
2146
2147
2148
2149
2150Help us grow Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki!
2151GET STARTED
2152Popular Pages
2153
2154The Angry Video Game Nerd (character)
2155
2156List of Angry Video Game Nerd episodes
2157
2158
2159Nostalgia Critic
2160
2161
2162Mike Matei
2163
2164
2165Kyle Justin
2166
2167 
2168EXPLORE PROPERTIES
2169Fandom
2170Gamepedia
2171D&D Beyond
2172Muthead
2173Futhead
2174FOLLOW US
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2192Take your favorite fandoms with you and never miss a beat.
2193D&D Beyond
2194Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki is a FANDOM Movies Community.
2195Follow Fandom Wikis on TwitterJokeyPsychEndgameHonestGalaxyQuest
2196
2197~~~~~
2198
2199
2200GAMES
2201MOVIES
2202TV
2203VIDEO
2204WIKIS
2205Search
2206START A WIKI
2207Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki
2208Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki
2209592
2210PAGES
2211ADD NEW PAGE
2212POPULAR PAGES
2213COMMUNITY
2214EXPLORE
2215FORUM
2216in:
2217Transcripts, Transcripts of 2006 Angry Video Game Nerd episodes
2218Transcript of AVGN episode McKids
2219EDIT
2220 
2221COMMENTS (2)
2222 
2223SHARE
2224MV5BOGUwN2I5MTctNTk0OS00MjYxLWI3Y2EtNTY3NGFjNWE2ZjlmXkEyXkFqcGdeQXVyMTQzMjU1NjE@. V1 
2225['The Angry Nintendo Nerd' theme song and intro plays.]
2226
2227McKids is nothing more than an advertising vehicle, much like games such as Yo! Noid and 7-Eleven Spot. Now some people out there may actually like this game, and to be fair, it isn't one of the worst games in the NES library. There are definitely much crappier games such as Bugs Bunny's Birthday Blowout and Silver Surfer, for example. So anyway, let's check out McKids.
2228McKids - Angry Video Game Nerd - Episode 7
2229McKids - Angry Video Game Nerd - Episode 7
2230
2231So there's Ronald with his magic bag... bag of hallucinogenic drugs. I always thought that clown was one scary motherfucker. The Hamburglar stole his bag, apparently.
2232
2233Alright, this is the first level. Now, does it look familiar? So where have I seen this before? Jumpin' around, collecting M's. Oh, like coins in Mario Bros.? Like, yeah, that's where I've seen this! It's just like Super Mario Bros. 3. Let's check it out. I mean, the map looks similar, same idea; the stages are designed the same. Jumping on enemies, I mean... everything looks the same. Mario's controls are a lot better, though. Well, pretty much everything is better.
2234
2235So back to McKids. You know, I changed my mind. It actually is pretty original. I mean, walkin' upside-down, I mean, that's pretty creative.
2236
2237[The in-game character spins around and moves backwards in the level at high speed.]
2238
2239Whoa, makes me feel sick. They must have been on crack when they came up with this game. So you go around collecting cards that ya need to beat the level. So... there you go, into Ronald's magic zipper, runnin' around through Magic McDonald World.
2240
2241[The in-game character spins backwards through the level again.]
2242
2243God, that really makes me nauseous. And don't try to kill anything with those blocks; that really doesn't work too well. Collect some more useless M's that don't do anything. Alright, here's a shitty bonus game. You jump on these arrows that make ya go up. You gotta jump on the white ones until you get to the top, and then when you get to the top, you go into another zipper, and you collect some 1-ups which, aren't really that important because, there's a part where you can get a whole bunch of 'em.
2244
2245Then you go to Birdie's stage. Stupid feathered fuckin' bird bitch.
2246
2247[The in-game character collects some M's in the shape of a smile and two eyes.]
2248
2249Heh, cute smiley face. You know what's a big problem with this game? I mean, you never know what's below you. You just fall and die.
2250
2251[The in-game character falls down a bottomless pit.]
2252
2253Fuckballs! This game's so bad, they actually invented a way to end it by pushing Start and Select at the same time. So you get this block which makes ya heavier, so you can jump higher, well, lower, really. And now, you have another 1-up that you don't need, so that's just a waste of time. Oh, and look! I died anyway, so, what a waste. Oh, God! Look, a McFlurry man! Those guys are badass!
2254
2255So how do I get that card? Oh, every kid knows how to do this. Just get the secret passageway under the clouds. Yeah, that's easy to figure out. Kids will have the patience to figure that out, 'cause, you know, kids have a lot of patience... especially the ones with ADD, such as myself.
2256
2257Then you go to Grimace's board. Here's Grimace, the big purple fuck. Look at his house! It looks like Barney the Dinosaur's testicle. Okay, so here's the part where you can get a billion 1-ups. So ya get just two 1-ups here, and then you go back into the board again. You die here, but ya always get one extra, so if you have an hour to waste, then, there ya go. (chuckles) Have fun. You're completely wasting your time anyway if you're playing this game, as I am. Let alone make a fuckin' video about it.
2258
2259And some people like to call 1-ups "extra guys" or "free mans". I like to call 'em life insurance. Look how bad the jumps are. Look at this. What a shitload of fuck! All I wanna do is get down to that barrel, but it's such a pain in the ass! And it keeps bouncin' me back up! Fuckfarts! It never ends with this game. It's just like an infinite turd coming out of my ass, just like an endless rope. I mean, when the fuck's it gonna be over? I can't stand this shit!
2260
2261Watch the moose! Grab a block and try to kill him. Unfortunately, it just bounces and misses him. Now look at this. Would ya ever guess that you're supposed to jump off this cliff? And this ship really minds me of Super Mario Bros. 3 again. And also, why is this guy walkin' on water? Who does he think he is, Jesus Christ?
2262
2263Then you gotta talk to the Professor, another one of Ronald's stoner friends. And he tells you to get more cards, which makes me just wanna punch him. Even worse, you gotta go to the moon, where you meet CosMc. Now who the hell's CosMc? Did they run out of McDonalds characters? What about Captain Crook or Big Mac? No, CosMc. I never heard of him. I guess there's nothin' more you can expect but a shitty character like that. I mean I bet the people who designed the game were paid minimum wage.
2264
2265So anyway, you're on the moon, so you're floatin' around, and then there's these tentacles that come out and kill ya wherever you go. And ya really gotta bust your balls to find all those cards. Like, there's this one that's high up in the air, and even when you get it, you jump back down and somethin' kills you and you gotta start the whole level all over again. Assballs!
2266
2267So here you are at the last stage, Robble Robble. You gotta get the cards from Hamburglar. So, you gotta get across the lava by throwing these blocks in it while all this stuff is shootin' at ya. Fuck! So look at this: this is some kind track ya have to move on. But ya can't because the controls are so hard. So do ya hit A or B? I don't know; I have no idea how to control this. You'd think you can just hold the A button or something, but no, of-of course not. That would be too simple. They have to make it like, you do these little taps with the button to make it move. And the controls just... suck ass. What a piece of shit! A little kid could never figure this out.
2268
2269So finally, when you get through all these crazy obstacles, you get up here, you walk all the way to this lava pit, and you don't have any blocks to float over it; you can't go around it, so... what do you do? Guess you just gotta commit suicide.
2270
2271[An image of the Nerd pops up in the bottom-right corner of the screen, similar to Mortal Kombat 2.]
2272
2273Toasty!
2274
2275Categories:
2276TranscriptsTranscripts of 2006 Angry Video Game Nerd episodes
2277Community content is available under CC-BY-SA unless otherwise noted.
2278Recent Wiki Activity
2279Mike Matei
2280Gokucock • 2 days ago
2281List of Angry Video Game Nerd Adventures Hazards and Enemies
2282Prabowo Muhammad • 4 days ago
2283Transcript of AVGN Episode Universal Studios Theme Parks Adventure
2284FrankRTWiw • 4 days ago
2285James & Mike Mondays
2286HorrorFan01 • 4 days ago
2287
2288
2289
2290
2291
2292Help us grow Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki!
2293GET STARTED
2294Popular Pages
2295
2296The Angry Video Game Nerd (character)
2297
2298List of Angry Video Game Nerd episodes
2299
2300
2301Nostalgia Critic
2302
2303
2304Mike Matei
2305
2306
2307Kyle Justin
2308
2309EXPLORE PROPERTIES
2310Fandom
2311Gamepedia
2312D&D Beyond
2313Muthead
2314Futhead
2315FOLLOW US
2316OVERVIEW
2317About
2318Careers
2319Press
2320Contact
2321Terms of Use
2322Privacy Policy
2323Global Sitemap
2324Local Sitemap
2325COMMUNITY
2326Community Central
2327Support
2328Help
2329ADVERTISE
2330Media Kit
2331Contact
2332FANDOM APPS
2333Take your favorite fandoms with you and never miss a beat.
2334D&D Beyond
2335Angry Video Game Nerd Wiki is a FANDOM Movies Community.
2336Follow Fandom Wikis on TwitterJokeyPsychEndgameHonestGalaxyQuest
2337
2338
2339
2340
2341one player cactus joey 2.5 seconds ss written all over it hate mail sore thumb